Mortavia? Ok, I guess anyplace will work for 1480; even a Christian monk named Guru (Neil Flanagan). That worthy is into torturing and killing witches, and garden variety malefactors. An issue arises when nice guy Carl (Paul Lieber) takes a shine to Nadja (Judith Israel), whom is saved from death. There's a hunchback, Igor, named Igor (Jack Spencer). Guru talks to himself; he sorta has to, split personality and all. Then there's the in-house witch, Olga (Jacqueline Webb).
The earnestness of everyone here belies the fact that this is a nice horror spoof. There's breezy music, and Igor bobbing about. Anyway, Christine (Julia Wills) shows up at church to consult with Father Guru. Olga mesmerizes her, and then gives her a vampire bite. Carl chats up Nadja; they're in love. Guru greets Father Polanski and Bishop Kopel (Gerald Jacuzzo and Frank Echols).
Despite their formal language, they don't necessarily like each other. "I know how difficult things are on this beastly island" says The Bishop. He wants to take Nadja; Guru won't give up his mistress. Meanwhile, Polanski finds her, and wonders why she's kept there. Polanski is supposed to replace Guru. Olga offers Polanski a priest's severed head--that's the exotic island menu. Igor saves Nadja from the vampire's grasp. What a nutty cackle Olga lets out!
Now Guru approaches Nadja. igor hears her scream, and attempts to rescue her once again. Yuck! Igor is nailed to the wall and gets his tongue snipped off. Carl shows up in timely fashion. For some reason, Olga attacks Guru, but stabs herself. Then, a somewhat recovered Igor takes on Guru. Stabbed a bunch of times, Igor isn't deterred; he manages to lasso Guru, who's trying to get away down the stairs. A cunning ploy for Igor, as his nemesis is hanged. Carl whisks Nadja away--the end.
This is the definition of a fun movie. I think it's possible that the slip-ups are intentional (why else do we get such a clear view of the modern scissors?). Those bits stand out because the sets and costumes are mostly authentic. Making fun of the Church wouldn't have an edge if all the clergymen didn't look the part. On the other hand, Olga and Igor are absurd characters that fit in brilliantly. Actually, the only thing that isn't nutty here is the Nadja/Carl romance.
So, there is a plot; in fact two. Who gets Nadja is the question for both the romance and the unsavory clerics who desire her. The first part seems to hint at a grisly exploitation sort of horror. That aspect is supplanted, fir the most part, by the macabre, yet goofy maneuvers and exploits of the creeps and bad guys. Very entertaining, subversive, campy, and a bit surreal.
The earnestness of everyone here belies the fact that this is a nice horror spoof. There's breezy music, and Igor bobbing about. Anyway, Christine (Julia Wills) shows up at church to consult with Father Guru. Olga mesmerizes her, and then gives her a vampire bite. Carl chats up Nadja; they're in love. Guru greets Father Polanski and Bishop Kopel (Gerald Jacuzzo and Frank Echols).
Despite their formal language, they don't necessarily like each other. "I know how difficult things are on this beastly island" says The Bishop. He wants to take Nadja; Guru won't give up his mistress. Meanwhile, Polanski finds her, and wonders why she's kept there. Polanski is supposed to replace Guru. Olga offers Polanski a priest's severed head--that's the exotic island menu. Igor saves Nadja from the vampire's grasp. What a nutty cackle Olga lets out!
Now Guru approaches Nadja. igor hears her scream, and attempts to rescue her once again. Yuck! Igor is nailed to the wall and gets his tongue snipped off. Carl shows up in timely fashion. For some reason, Olga attacks Guru, but stabs herself. Then, a somewhat recovered Igor takes on Guru. Stabbed a bunch of times, Igor isn't deterred; he manages to lasso Guru, who's trying to get away down the stairs. A cunning ploy for Igor, as his nemesis is hanged. Carl whisks Nadja away--the end.
This is the definition of a fun movie. I think it's possible that the slip-ups are intentional (why else do we get such a clear view of the modern scissors?). Those bits stand out because the sets and costumes are mostly authentic. Making fun of the Church wouldn't have an edge if all the clergymen didn't look the part. On the other hand, Olga and Igor are absurd characters that fit in brilliantly. Actually, the only thing that isn't nutty here is the Nadja/Carl romance.
So, there is a plot; in fact two. Who gets Nadja is the question for both the romance and the unsavory clerics who desire her. The first part seems to hint at a grisly exploitation sort of horror. That aspect is supplanted, fir the most part, by the macabre, yet goofy maneuvers and exploits of the creeps and bad guys. Very entertaining, subversive, campy, and a bit surreal.