Review of Vincent

Vincent (2014)
2/10
This is NOT a superher movie...AT ALL. Really. I promise.
16 June 2019
Warning: Spoilers
"A superhero story you've never seen before: Vincent is a quiet man who happens to have secret superpowers. When Vincent falls for a woman, and she discovers his super secret, his life is changed forever." - Some IDIOT at Amazon Prime

The ONLY thing that the synopsis from Amazon Prime has to do with this movie is about how the quiet Vincent has superpowers and falls for a woman. This is NOT a superhero story. This is not a story of a man whose life is changed. This isn't even a story about a woman "discovering" Vincent's superpowers.

Here's what this movie ended up being about (whether intended or not): Vincent is a quiet man that gets by in life, but he has a secret- he's got superpowers! He tries not to reveal himself, but he meets a woman and he won't stand idly by while a friend is beaten, so he gets sloppy. Now Vincent is on the run. Will he get away? Yes. And he'll just have to start over from the beginning- which is exactly what it appears he was doing from the start of this movie as well.

I wasted 74 minutes of my life on this awful movie because I figured- well, if he's a super hero, it can't be ALL THAT BAD. IT WAS.

He wasn't a superhero. He was barely "super"... In fact, he was ONLY super when he was sopping wet. On the one hand, this is a great premise for a superhero character. On the other hand, they did an awful job of making it any kind of a decent movie. The story fall completely flat. The "woman" that he likes ends up being particularly boring. She barely registers in the film. I'm pretty sure I saw a nut sack at one point :shudder:. At least we get to see Vimala Pons nude.

If anything, Vincent is actually a criminal- excessive force, battery, assault? Definitely destruction of private property.
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