Blood Glacier (2013)
4/10
It ain't no Thing.
23 November 2018
Scientists collecting data on climate change in the Austrian Alps discover a strange organism that attacks the local fauna, resulting in vicious hybrids.

With its remote sub-zero setting and hideous genetic mash-ups, comparisons between Blood Glacier (AKA The Station) and John Carpenter's The Thing (1982) are inevitable, but really there is no contest: Carpenter's film isn't perfect, but it more than delivers with its amazing special effects; on the other hand, the extras on the DVD of Blood Glacier include a gallery of impressive pre-production sketches, but the film fails to make good on the promise of weird and wonderful creatures, most of its monsters only seen in fleeting glimpses (and what we do see isn't great, which is probably why they remain hidden for most of the movie).

Blood Glacier also suffers from a raft of thoroughly unlikable characters that are nigh impossible to care about: the only death that has any impact is that of Tinni the dog. The movie's mountainous scenery is great, but breath-taking vistas only count for so much - Blood Glacier's stunning cinematography cannot compensate for the weak script (they never explained why a girl was running down the mountain in shorts and a vest), dreary pacing, and a lack of memorable mutations.

3.5/10, generously rounded up to 4 for IMDb.
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