Judge Dredd (1995)
4/10
Big budget time waster
9 August 2016
Warning: Spoilers
More no-brain thrills and spills from Stallone, who found his popularity on the wane at around this period. On the strength of this film, I can't say I'm surprised, especially as scenes of Stallone walking around like a tree shouting "I am the LAW!" in a supposed-serious manner are frequently laughable and make you feel embarrassed for the actor. JUDGE DREDD is one of those movies that was possibly messed up in post-production, as the disjointed, fragmented narrative and frequently confusing action may testify to. Indeed in one scene we see a bloodless Stallone in action; in the next we see him running down a corridor bleeding profusely, suggesting that perhaps large chunks of the film were cut out due to negative audience reaction?

Whatever the reasons, JUDGE DREDD is a shallow, action-packed film totally lacking in any characterisation or deep plot. In this respect it may be a good approximation of a comic book, but as a film it's a failure and makes you wonder why on earth they bothered in the first place. The biggest insult is that the producers have gathered together an excellent cast of famous names and faces, only to mishandle them and let them sleepwalk through their respective roles on autopilot. Apart from the granite-jawed Stallone in the lead role, we have Diane Lane as the superfluous love interest who spends a large amount of screen time missing; Jurgen Prochnow (in his "do anything for the money" period) as the boring, ineffectual and forgettable bad guy; Max Von Sydow as Chief Justice, whose role amounts to little more than a cameo; and Joan Chen whose screen time is also minimal. The only people who seem to be trying are the not-too-irritating Rob Schneider as the comedy sidekick and Armand Assante as the crazed, ruthless villain.

It's a shame as this movie is so poor, because the special effects are marvellous. The evocation of a futuristic cityscape is something that is done often in the movies and here it is most impressive. Also impressive are two robot creations (one CGI, one makeup) which act as adversaries for Stallone. The first is a gigantic, ED-209 style bodyguard for Assante, which lumbers through scenes shooting and tearing people limb from limb! Cool stuff and some fantastic CGI work. The second is an equally impressive android-man called Mean Machine who has a metal head and arm; he's one of the evilest robots that I've seen in a film, and it's a shame that he only appears in one scene. Sadly, as a whole JUDGE DREDD is a mess which glamourises death and violence so much that it doesn't mean anything in the end (by the time Stallone finishes slaughtering his 100th bad guy in EXACTLY THE SAME WAY you end up getting sick and tired of it all). COMMANDO this ain't. Instead, it's a time wasting big-budget flick which is impossible to enjoy with the brain engaged.
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