Creep Van (2012)
5/10
Watch out, watch out, Lloyd Kaufman's about.
29 June 2014
When a film features a cameo from Troma head honcho Lloyd Kaufman there's a pretty high chance that it'll be very dumb, and it's almost as likely that it will be a low-budget crap-fest. Lloyd has a cameo in Creep Van. 'Nuff said.

But as dumb and as crap as this cheapo horror film undeniably is, I still had a reasonable amount of fun with it thanks to the inventive and rather graphic gore and a fair amount of female nudity (where there's Kaufman, there's usually a naked chick or three not very far away).

Creep Van stars Brian Kolodziej as Campbell Jackson, a loser who sorely needs a car of his own in order to improve his job prospects. For the time being, he takes work at a car wash, where he meets Amy (Amy Wehrell), whom he takes an instant shine to. Keen to get himself some wheels, Campbell rings and enquires about a van he sees for sale, unaware that the owner of said vehicle is a homicidal maniac who has fitted the van with all kinds of deadly booby traps.

Starting with a cool gore effect where a thief is bisected by the van's window, this film is loaded with enthusiastic splatter, making it a passable watch despite a terrible script and lots of lousy acting (Lloyd Kaufman gives one of the better performances, which should give you some idea of how bad everyone is).

Other juicy moments include a tough girl cut in half by the van, a chick in a bikini (played by porn-star Angelina Armani) having her head crushed, two of Campbell's friends being splattered while having sex, a guy's face mashed by an air bag full of nails, and a great death scene for the van's deranged owner.

I don't really want to make a habit of recommending Troma movies, but if you're in the mood for some seriously trashy entertainment then Creep Van might just about fit the bill.
0 out of 1 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

Recently Viewed