lanimae61 Review of Earth's Final Hours

Earth's Final Hours (2011 TV Movie)

silly plot for yet another disastrous disaster movie

[2/10 · 5 December 2011]

You know it's going to be bad when a bloke cops a bit of space debris which hurtles not only through his chest, but the the earth, and the unfortunate man survives long enough with no chest to reveal the location of secret base! Oh Please! How many words are you going to be able to get out with no lungs, and for that matter, a hole where your heart used to be. As usual, the disaster take place in the USA. The bit of space debris starts there and pops out after a speedy journey through the middle of our planet. The evil man from the government tries to stop the good man from the government from saving the world. The bad man has some deluded idea that he can shield just his little bit of the planet and all will be well. There good man of course kidnaps, er sorry, rescues a bloke who programmed a couple of huge satellites with floppy discs (as if that in itself is some kind of programming language). It was all part of a secret government experiment which was only there to explain how a few million bucks of hardware got into space. As standard these days, the good blokes kid sorts us all out because the teenager is a whiz at hacking which clearly qualifies him to speak to a 20 year old space computer. And together with the good blokes friend they all band together to restart the computers at the secret base, get them to talk to the satellites, and get those satellites to point themselves at earth, turn on, and form some kind of magnetic field which will start the earth turning before it has stopped! Oh yeah, there is lots of gunfire and punching. I'm sorry, this is just awful. The story is ludicrous and the script weedy and thin. The actors do their best but you never really bond with them. In fact by the end you find yourself wishing the whole planet is going to be eaten alive by the magnetic storm which runs amok throughout. The highlight was the FX which were OK for a low brow low budget telliemovie. If you are home on a cold wet winters day and there is nothing else on, read a book but whatever you do don't waste your time on this garbage. I rather feel like I have lost consciousness just writing about it. That's rather sad as I'd only just recovered from watching it. Honestly just don't bother.