6/10
"'Oh God, how old are you?"
26 May 2010
Bad Girls Dormitory is what you get when you put the director of gay porn in charge of a 'Women In Prison' exploitation flick: what is intended to be a gritty slice of sleaze regularly veers into 'camp trash' territory, and the standard of women is average at best, ranging from the downright ugly to the vaguely pretty, with most failing to fill their regulation tight white t-shirts in a satisfactory manner; in contrast, all the men look like gay porn stars, being either buff or blessed with impressive upper-lip facial hair.

Director Tim Kincaid does manage to tick off most of the standard elements one expects from such a film, including a protagonist that doesn't deserve her fate (Carey Zuris as Lori), a cat fight in the mess room, lesbian sex, rape by the more despicable male members of staff, gratuitous shower scenes, a couple of killings, and a riot that allows for a spot of bloody revenge, but his handling of the material is far from great: not one of his cast gives anything remotely resembling a convincing performance; the fight scenes are totally unrealistic; the dialogue is diabolical; and any attempts at pathos are totally botched.

Having said that, it is thanks to Kincaid's lousy film-making skills and his cast's total lack of acting ability—plus loads of hilarious mid-80s trappings—that the film proves to be quite a lot of fun. How could anyone fail to enjoy the drawn out brawl between tough prisoner Rebel (Donna Eskra) and a dyke guard in which neither person lands a convincing punch? Or a disco scene with male visitors dressed like members of Debarge? Or Lisa's stunning (ie. crap) display of grief when she hears of her mother's death? Or... well, the list could go on and on. Suffice to say that if terrible, trashy movies are your thing, you really must see Bad Girls Dormitory.
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