2/10
"We aren't in Germany." Another terrible 'Mockbuster' from The Asylum.
8 June 2009
Warning: Spoilers
Journey to the Center of the Earth starts as six hard as nails teenage female marines are selected for some top secret US Army experiment, using a particle transporter of some sort they are being beamed instantly from a location in California to Stuttgart in Germany through the center of the Earth for reasons never explained. Unfortunately things go wrong & instead of just passing through the center of the Earth the six feisty females are actually dumped there & find themselves in what looks like some woods where prehistoric creatures roam. With no weapons for protection, no beacon to get back home or even a radio to make contact & trapped 600Km underground being stalked by giant Spider's & T-Rex's things look bleak for our girls. That is unless project leader Joseph Harnet (Greg Evigan) can mount a daring rescue mission & save his girls...

Also known as Journey to Middle Earth here in the UK on DVD (to cash in on Lord of the Rings maybe?) this low budget 'Mockbuster' was directed by David Jones & Scott Wheeler & the only reason The Asylum made this production of Jules Verne's classic novel Journey to the Center of the Earth was because of the big budget rather fun & hugely successful (although the makers of this didn't know how successful it was going to be when they made this as both were released around the same time, in fact this Journey to the Center of the Earth was release about a week earlier than the Hollywood 3-D one) version made by Hollywood in 3-D staring Brendan Fraser that I can assure you is infinitely better than this sorry excuse for a rip-off. Out of the eleven comments on the IMDb so far (obviously the number will increase over time) only three rate Joureny to the Center of the Earth higher than either one or two stars & no-one has dared give it more than a paltry four so far which just about says it all really, I simply cannot see any normal sane person enjoying this film at all. It is that bad. Do you want to see a Dinosaur attack where you don't actually see the Dinosaur at all? Well, it happens here. Do you want to see a film where the might of the US military can only conjure up six feeble teenage girls to take part in an experiment that could literally change the way we live? Do you want to see a film where only one person dies on screen? Do you want to see a film that makes no logical sense? I mean if they are stuck 600Km under the Erath's surface where is the clear bright sunlight coming from? Why is there a mix of factual Dinosaur's like a T-Rex & the purely fictional like the giant Spider's? Do you want to see a film where it is possible to dig through 600Km of Earth in an hour or two? Seriously Journey to the Center of the Earth is a mess from start to finish with awful character's that feel out of place, terrible dialogue, a main plot which consists of these girly soldiers walking through what looks like a normal wood trying to avoid Dinosaur's which we barely even see & a horrible happily ever after sickly sweet style ending that just adds insult to injury & the final twist shot leaves the door open for a possible sequel which sends shivers down my spine just thinking about it. Terrible, simple as that.

Although there are barely any effect in it I must admit that the CGI work is the best I have seen in a film from The Asylum thus far with a reasonable looking T-Rex & a half decent giant Spider at the end. Don't get me wrong they still look poor but by the usual standards of The Asylum they are an improvement but that in itself really isn't saying much. There is one fairly gory shot at the end when someone's stomach explodes which really sticks out because apart from that one shot there isn't any blood, gore or violence elsewhere at all. The film looks cheap, the center of the Earth bits are supposed to hold a sense of wonder & look alien but here these scenes look like any old wood was used.

The budget was probably none existent, this has a really cheap made-for-telly look about that even the Sci-Fi Channel would be embarrassed about. The acting is generally poor, Greg Evigan is awful while his daughter Vanessa Lee Evigan plays one of the soldiers. The one bright spark in this terrible film is Dedee Pfeiffer (yes, Michelle Pfeiffer's sister) who puts in a fun performance & still looks quite good despite being the wrong side of forty.

Journey to the Center of the Earth is a terrible rip-off 'Mockbuster' made by rip-off specialists The Asylum to shamelessly cash-in on the big budget Hollywood version released around the same time. Definitely one to avoid. There has been at least nine filmed adaptations of Verne's novel Journey to the Center of the Earth & while I haven't seen them all I can quite confidently say this is probably the worst.
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