3/10
Zombie Island Massacre
26 February 2009
Warning: Spoilers
American tourists decide to take a Caribbean bus ride to attend a possibly authentic voodoo ceremony, afterward falling prey to predators cloaked in darkness attacking when they are at their most vulnerable. Who are these people? Are they the "voodoo people" with a hidden, hostile agenda? Or, are these monsters of a different kind? Are they in fact some sort of zombies that are terrorizing these foreigners for possibly invading their turf? Essentially a murder spree, as victims are picked off one or two at a time when separated from the group..by even the smallest distance. The killers are barely visible, entwined with leaves and barely shown on screen thanks to a camera which attempts to avoid the predators as much as possible. The mystery of who they are is VERY underwhelming, and a great many of the kills are rather lamely executed(..the decapitation is incredibly dopey as the head falls from the neck before the machete even touches it). Most of the violence is off screen, but when daggers penetrate victims, we see close-ups of the weapon inside the body with limited blood shed(..another scene has a couple landing in a pit layered with wooden spikes). There are some effective shot gun sequences where victims are blasted in the torso after releasing their spears. Paul(David Broadnax), is a black photographer who might be more than he appears, but another amongst the group is also hiding something as well. Steve(Tom Cantrell)is the other male of the group who takes a vital role in guiding them out of a difficult situation.

When their bus has been interfered with after the zombie ritual, the driver goes for help, vanishing leaving the group to fend for themselves. That is when Paul and Steve take charge, leading the group to a lavish unoccupied villa not too far away..the journey to get there has casualties. The premise has possibilities, but the pace is lethargic and the characters uninteresting. The death sequences never achieve a visceral thrill despite the opportunistic story-line of tourists trapped in a harrowing fight for survival in an unfamiliar place. The low budget obviously had something to do with the ineffectiveness of it all. It's obvious, due to her hideous performance as Sandy, that Rita Jenrette was hired for her breasts, which greet us in a shower sequence and a little later when her boyfriend, Joe(Ian McMillan)wants to make out in the lower deck of a yacht. Important character, Connie(Diane Clayre Holub), who conveniently saw the villa and communicated it's whereabouts to the rest of the group, has an important agenda that will play out at the end in the climactic showdown. The attempts at character development and the explanation for the events that transpire, fall positively flat. The tourists themselves as a collective unit(..other than the two men that lead when the going gets tough)nag and whine incessantly for the duration, not unusual in these types of films because when they are eventually killed you simply could care less.
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