City in Panic (1986)
1/10
M for Mundane
25 January 2008
I can't believe I'm going to do this, but I HAVE to write a comment for probably the worst movie I have ever seen. Don't get me wrong, I love trashy movies. However, CITY IN PANIC is just trash. I mean that in the most literal of senses. I found this VHS in a heap of trash while doing my annual "End of the Year Dorm Dumpster Dive." See, at my alma marta, the end to every hallway would be FULL of junk that residents would leave behind after the school year was over. A couple of friends and I would always peruse the mess for some hidden gems. Mostly it was all junk, but every once in a while you find something cool. Like a whiskey bible or a Wayne's World Dice Game. And sometimes you'd just find garbage, like a VHS copy of CITY IN PANIC. Man, I should have figured...

The movie seems to have been made by a group of high school freshmen who just found out what sexual discrimination is, and thought that they were really "pushing the envelope" by involving a taboo subject such as AIDS. Ugh. Nothing in this movie works, and the only reason why the ending is a surprise is because you stopped caring about figuring anything out. Halfway through the thing, you can't even hear it over the sounds of your own prayers for an end to the cruelty emanating from the television.

I would end this review with something along the lines of "Stay away from this movie at all cost," but just the simple fact that you are reading this means that it is too late. I can see no reason why anyone would search out this movie unless they had already had the misfortune of viewing it. Sorry guy. We've got meetings on Friday at 9pm over at the Rec Center. Punch and pie.
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