Dear God (1996)
1/10
Why can't we give a film zero?
29 March 2003
Wow. Sometimes you go into the cinema or turn on the TV and, two hours or so later, you realize that you've just seen one of the finest films ever made; the sheer joy of that experience stays with you for days. Films like LORD OF THE RINGS, SEVEN SAMURAI, LAWRENCE OF ARABIA.

This film manages to produce the opposite reaction however. It is, without a shadow of a doubt, the worst movie I have ever seen. Worse than the last entries in POLICE ACADEMY. Worse than MISSION TO MARS. Worse even than BATTLEFIELD EARTH. It is cloyingly horrible, with appalling performances and an even more terrible script and story -- I felt my brain rotting as I watched it.

The only explanation I can give for the IMDb rating of 4.9 (including 40 people who gave it 10/10 and an average vote in the US of 5.2!) is that, a la VIDEODROME, there must be usually some kind of signal broadcast with this film that removes all critical abilities (fortunately they seem to have forgotten to flick the right switch the time I saw it). Either that or everyone who has given it a high vote has been home-schooled and this is the most exciting film they've ever been allowed to watch as it features a modern-day criminal rather than just biblical characters....
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