Don't Watch Shortened Versions!
12 January 2004
Warning: Spoilers
At the brink of retirement, Sherlock Holmes (Christopher Lee) and Dr. Watson (Patrick Macnee) are sent by the King to deliver a precious jewel safely to England. This job is complicated when the jewel is stolen and an unknown man is found murdered at the site of the heist. The ensuing mystery inexplicably involves many famous people (and at least one other famous literary character) including former president Theodore Roosevelt.

The casting is superb. Lee, a well-read actor, who was acquainted with Arthur Conan Doyle's son Adrian, is a fine older Holmes, while Macnee seems born to play Watson -- the fumbling old codger who proves invaluable because of his iron nerve, courage under fire, and quick thinking (the fact that we know him as John Steed makes us know that under the bumbling exterior he'll show grit when it comes to a fight).

Where the movie fails is in the story. The longer versions entwines implausible story lines about Lily Langtree and her (absurd) lover, about the niece of the former president, about a wealthy Indian widow, and the precious stone. Even in the longer version, the story lines don't seem to make sense. On one viewing I'm not certain why they were at Victoria Falls at all. And it all leads up to a curious conclusion in the most inappropriate of places.

POSSIBLE SPOILER: why is the thief even there? Why didn't he jump ship long before the conclusion, drop his identity, and abscond with the jewel?

I'm not a fan of stories where Sherlock Holmes hobnobs with famous people of "his day" (remember, he never lived). Plots about the famous with Sherlock Holmes always come off as contrived. And Sherlock Holmes doesn't do much deducting. He stumbles accidentally into clues. He gives his adage of not making deductions ahead of the facts, then gives Watson an alternative version of an accepted story that's based on no facts at all, but solely on speculation. He seems to make what deductions he makes not so much on fact but on leaps of faith.

ANOTHER POSSIBLE SPOILER: Theodore Roosevelt must've had a film projector whose quality of detail was a century ahead of its time.

The cast, setting, design, costumes, and look of the show are superb. Where it fails is in the writing. It's an entertaining and even enjoyable romp, but it relies on cliches, unbelievable situations, unexplained happenings .. . and at the end of the day it doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Still, it's a fine Holmes and Watson combination and any Holmes lover will want to see it -- but never the short version.
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