If it were twice as good, it could be on MST3K
15 March 2004
Wow, where to start. I was excited to find this, as it looked like the type of ultra-cheesy sci-fi T&A flick I so enjoy. Was I wrong.

What's good:

Six breasts. A couple butts in thongs. I think the lead character's breasts are actually pixelated out in one scene towards the end, but it's hard to tell; maybe the video quality is just that bad.

Three girls run around in spandex bike shorts through most of the movie. Or should I say sit around.

There's a catfight at the end. I rate it a 1 out of 10.

What's bad:

The dialogue and acting. Stupendously awful. Take the first ten people you meet on the street, then get rid of the five most talented ones, and the remaining five could write and act better than this.

The video quality of the DVD - like something you'd record off TV on a really old VCR tape. I can only assume it was filmed using camcorders. Audio is center speaker only. Music is...words fail me.

The budget. If you drive a 10 year old Chevy Nova, and sold it to finance your moviemaking project, you could make this. There are actually a half dozen people listed in the credits under "stunts", but I can't imagine what stunts they did. Two people are listed as "fight choreographers", but c'mon, that's just laughable. Any pair of twelve-year-olds having a pretend fight in the back yard would be more convincing. Much more convincing.

The story. It looks like they drove around LA at night until they found a particularly deserted street or parking lot, then quickly filmed a scene there. If they would have just ad-libbed the dialogue and made up the story as they went, it could have only been an improvement. But it actually sounds as if they're reciting memorized lines.

T&A? Very little. The sexy picture on the box cover? Ain't in the movie. The catfight at the end is lame. Considering that a sexy catfight is the only thing this movie could have possibly aspired to deliver, and it wouldn't have cost any more to give us a good one, why do they only give us this crap?

By the end it left me with the impression that I'd just watched a home movie made by my neighbor. While he was on a three day drunk.
14 out of 19 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

Recently Viewed