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jmudra
Reviews
The Crucifier (2005)
bad bad movie. I mean REALLY bad.
I don't know if you can even rent this movie... it's definitely a low budget film. Looks like something someone made for some class in college. Actually, I was making better stuff when I was 13 w/ my dad's VHS camcorder!!! Just, Mine didn't have any hot girls with tits. And I don't think I would have included all these weird satanic references in it.
I don't know where this thing came from, but wow... after about 5 minutes into the movie I started to fast forward through it!!!
I think you have to be tripping on LSD to find this movie interesting at all.
It seemed more like a bad bondage film to me, there's lots of tits, lots of OK looking girls being tied up.
other than that, it truly seems like some dork got hold of some better film making equipment, and since he didn't have anything better to do with his time b/c he's a loser, he made this movie.
I can't believe I wasted 15 min trying to watch it, and all the bandwidth downloading it... AR, it's really painful...
not painful in a good way like Gummo either, painful in the having to watch your little cousins hour long film on his walk through the woods... actually THAT might be more entertaining!!!
Transporter 2 (2005)
Wow, was this bad!
This movie has nothing to do with the original other than the character Frank and his abilities to drive a car like whoa!
The number of impossibilities are endless... in fact, I found myself laughing at the outrageousness more than I was enthralled by the action. As the movie goes on, it gets WORSE and WORSE... HE EVEN DOGDGES BULLETS MATRIX STYLE! Considering this isn't the matrix, and Frank isn't Neo, I found the bullet dodging a bit hard to take.
If you liked the first movie... you will not like this one! If you liked the XXX movies, you might like this one!
I CAN't BELIEVE ROGER EBERT GAVE THIS A THUMBS UP! Just goes to show how much this idiot knows!!!