stevelivesey-37183 Reviews

Godzilla Minus One (2023)

Good movies like this are becoming a rarity

[8/10 · 23 June 2024]

Surely it shouldn't be that difficult. Surely it should simply be a case of choose a plot, give it some backstory, inject some characters with definite aspects to their being both positive and negative, give these characters some motivation that the audience will understand and empathise with and follow these building blocks to a logical conclusion that doesn't confuse said audience.

GM1 does this and it only cost 15 million to make. Compare that to the recent Marvels or Indiana Jones movie that cost twenty times that amount and it makes the achievement of the movie all the more amazing.

Yes, the CGI isn't the greatest but who cares, it is good enough for the story that they are trying to tell.

Highly recommended.

Road Wars: Max Fury (2024)

Apocalyptic LARPing with boss babes on a budget

[3/10 · 21 June 2024]

It's terrible. It's cheap. It's badly written. It's atrociously acted. It was was probably filmed in an afternoon.....in a desert......with an iPhone.

So it should deserve a 1 for being terrible, however, it does have the great Vernon Wells in it!! You know, Him from the MadMax 2 movie, the one with the Mohawk and the assless chaps."....ok maybe not that great.

I couldn't give this a 1 simply because, well, at least they tried. It can't be easy making a movie on a budget like this.

Actually, I just decided to give it another mark because at least music matched scenes and they were edited fairly competently. So there, a 3..... god save me.

I Used to Be Funny (2023)

Interestingly structured but draining and ultimately a chore to get through

[5/10 · 20 June 2024]

IUTBF is a tough movie to love. I guess you would have to live in the disillusioned LA Gen Z bubble to understand any of the characters or their motivations. Cinema is best defined as an empathy creating machine but this movie made me feel nothing.

The issue is mostly the awkward, stilted conversations in the screenplay. The opaque plot doesn't help. The flashback scenes provide some drama but also make the whole film seem like a Greek tragedy.

The direction is actually fairly effective, the acting, however, is not. Some of the characters will be grating to a 'normal' audience. Hence the need for the bubble.

I never thought that a movie about a stand up comic could be so laugh free.

The Mistress (II) (2022)

A mixed bag of ideas and execution, some good some terrible.

[5/10 · 20 June 2024]

The basic story of the movie is really good, couple move into haunted house.....he has had a stalker.....overbearing neighbour.......troubled writer, etc, etc.

John Magaro is excellent as the writer, the interplay between the dreams and real life is good enough and the direction leans heavily on Hitchcock, Giallo and, at times, Kubrick for inspiration.

However the issues come with the execution. The wife of our 'protagonist' is terrible. Absolutely no chemistry with her husband (she may get on well with the furniture as she is that wooden). Several scenes seem to have been created without consideration to the rest of the movie. The wife is angry one minute and cheerful the next, the angry neighbour is angry, errrr.......because? And the pacing is so off it feels like a waltz.....slow, slow, quick quick slow.

The Follower (II) (2017)

A decent stab at a horror but hamstrung by budget

[3/10 · 20 June 2024]

The set up is quite good. YouTuber films a haunted house type of thing.

However, the writing is a problem. The main female character is either badly acted or written or both. Kind and apologetic one minute whilst being angry and psychotic the next.

The structure of the movie is decent enough but there are several contrived parts to the story such as, we never find out what is in grandma's room and the ending gets air dropped from out of nowhere.

With more time and money and more structure to the plot this could hav3 been something. Unfortunately, it mostly comes across as a hobby movie for film graduates.

Greta (2018)

Huppert is wonderful but the rest descends into silliness

[5/10 · 17 June 2024]

I have So many questions after watching this thriller that starts brightly but then becomes silly.

As said, Huppert is fantastic as the deranged, manipulative stalker. Moretz is unconvincing as the protagonist. It is generally well made with decent production values.

However, like I said, I have questions. Why did the police not act? How did the father find out? How did everyone get hold of Rohypnol so easily? Why not use a gun? Why keep Moretz in a room near the front door when a basement is available?......like I said, silly.

Far too many convenices and contrivances in the plot but with regard to Huppert, class is class.

I Saw the TV Glow (2024)

This is what American film making has become

[2/10 · 17 June 2024]

Most people will detest this for the nonsensical plot, the glacial pace, the 'modern' messages or the bizarre casting choices. I just detest this for all four.

The direction is not that bad, it does have a little 'style' to it. It's just that the pace kills any momentum in any dramatic scene.

Justice Smith is 28 years old. In this we are led to believe he is in 9th grade. As if. Between fifteen and sixteen years old. He wanders though this film mumbling and stumbling through his lines having the acting range of a dead halibut.

Unfortunately there is far too much of the navel gazing, self insert, 'O woe is me' type of film making. It might be great for mopey teenagers at Sundance but says nothing to the rest of the world but then, it was never meant to.

The Idea of You (2024)

Anne Hathaway shines in Hallmark type movie

[5/10 · 15 June 2024]

It's always nice to see Anne Hathaway in anything but this is very mediocre fan fiction at best. It really reminded me of Notting Hill or that awful J-Lo and Owen Wilson movie a Few years back.

Nothing is especially bad, it's just that it tries very hard to be inoffensive and be kind to all the characters. Unfortunately, it also makes them a bit boring. I think some humour wouldn't have gone amiss.

I can't really believe that Hathaways character would have been single, or the pop star guy for that matter. Did he have a fetish for cougars?

I didn't find the breakup's believable. I can't believe that everyone was so naive.

Silent Hill: Revelation (2012)

A very mid sequel hampered by lack of budget and talent

[5/10 · 13 June 2024]

It's still watchable because it's a creepy Silent Hill movie, but compared to the first one, it's very meh.

The story isn't as good, the acting isn't as good and the fact that it was shot for a 3D cinema release doesn't help.

There are still some good, creepy scenes but overall, fairgrounds are not particularly scary.

Nice to see Sean Bean in this and a young Jon Snow. They will meet up in a years time to do Game of Thrones and Sean Bean will loose the terrible American accent he does.

Carrie Ann Moss really falls from grace. A fall that continues with the last Matrix movie and the appalling Acolyte.

Silent Hill (2006)

Makes almost no sense but really creepy.

[8/10 · 13 June 2024]

There are so many fanatastic set pieces in this wonderful horror film by Christophe Gans.

Wallow in the brilliance of the design of the movie, the creepy atmosphere, the unique monsters and the predicaments that that our protagonist finds herself in.

Consider the terrifying beauty of pyramid head and the elevator scene. The sound of the horn and what transpires in the school with barb wire guy. And the awful, creepy cult that burn people at the stake. Not too mention the bling psycho nurses.

I have never played the game, maybe it explains it all a little better but to me, I doesn't matter.

Well worth a watch.

The Primevals (2023)

Weird. A new movie from a director that died 25 years ago.

[4/10 · 13 June 2024]

A movie that is brand new and yet very dated.

I loved watching the original Jason and the Argonauts as a kid and this took me back in a good way to the stop motion genius of Ray Harryhausen.

It has be said that this is not of that quality. The plot is quite silly. The acting is generally weak from (apart from Judith Mills) a bunch of nobodies.

That being said, the film is rather light hearted, good natured and zips along without outstaying its welcome.

The film is worth seeing if only for the story attached to the making of it. Check out the trivia section.

Nice to see a movie that wasn't created for modern audiences again.

Wild Eyed and Wicked (2023)

Silly, boring and confusing

[2/10 · 12 June 2024]

A very strange film for sure. How would I describe it?

Part ghost story, part LBGTQIA story, part dungeons and dragons. I think that's got the main points down.

None of it made any sense. There were some good scenes at least. Those were the creepy ones. The lesbian relationship bit had no bearing on the rest of the story.

The main character was horribly written being the most unsympathetic protagonist I have ever seen in a motion picture. She is bratty, spoilt, ungrateful and generally unhappy with everyone.

Thankfully it's a tiny budget, so at least it won't be disappointing its bank manager too much. In short, avoid.

Maelstrom (2000)

A fledgling Villenueve gives us A strange film told in a unique way.

[6/10 · 9 June 2024]

How do you describe this? How do you review it?

The acting, direction, plot and cinematography are all top notch. Villenueve gives us glimpses of what he will become in movies such as Dune, Prisoners and Arrival.

Is it a bit arthouse? Possibly. Is it quirky? Definitely.

The story is one of a self obsessed woman who ploughs through life with no thought for anyone but herself. The consequences of her actions never really come back to haunt her.

The graphic depiction of an abortion in the opening scenes is particularly gruelling, the failed shop, the drunken nights, the drunken driving, etc etc.

The fish are strange but add to the strange tone the film takes.

The Legend of Tarzan (2016)

Rollicking good romp let down by overuse of the CGI

[5/10 · 8 June 2024]

In truth this is somewhere between a five and a six.

Stars hard is pretty good as the titular character, Margot Robbie is, well, Margot Robbie and Samuel L Jackson is badly cast for the first time in his career.

The story combines flashbacks to an origin story which work quite well and a kidnap and chase story which is ok, I guess.

My biggest problem is the awful overuse of CGI. Everything looks fake and I never feel any real peril for out protagonists. Don't get me wrong, I understand that without CGI, making a movie like this would have been impossible.

But here's the thing. How come I watch Jurassic Park now, thirty years after it came out and am still amazed at the quality of the effects and how they make me feel?

Kill Your Lover (2023)

An emotional, claustrophobic horror that shows promise.

[6/10 · 8 June 2024]

I decided to give this a watch because of the synopsis....a couple split up and turn into 'monsters/become infected by something repulsive' as a metaphor for the relationship and the toxic way in which they can end. Was it about that? Well, kind of.

This is a very low budget, claustrophobic horror that would seem to convey all the above whilst doing flashback cutaway scenes to show the story of the start of the relationship though to its zenith.

The direction in that respect is rather good, the central idea is really good, the execution however, can be a little hit and miss.

At its best, it's a grotesque emotional horror rather than a physical one. At its worst, it's a faux intellectual, faux arthouse, film school project.

The actors are mostly a miss. The characters are not very sympathetic and you will feel like you a chlorox bath after watching. Anything that makes feel all those things can't be half bad.

Planetarium (2016)

An interesting start that descends into pretentious twaddle.

[3/10 · 2 June 2024]

The half hour is quite interesting. Two sisters running a seance business in pre WW2 Paris. A man wants to get them into movies and get evidence of proof. So far, so good.

The movie then disappears up its own backside, loosing all structure or semblance of a plot or characters.

The film seems to become more important than the seance act. So, all that build up for nothing.

Characters drift in and out with no purpose or reason, and we are left to drift in a vain hope of what could have been.

The movie has wonderful production values that pay homage to Paris setting and is well lit with excellent set decoration.

But as for the rest ...no thanks.

Shrink (2009)

I miss Kevin Spacey in movies

[6/10 · 2 June 2024]

Ok, so this movie is barely a five but then I realised the Spacey was fantastic in The Usual Suspects, Swimming With Sharks and American Beauty to name but three, and I bumped it up a notch.

Shrink is one of those annoying LA based movies that centres around the movie making community that may work for people who live in it, but becomes boring if you live outside of Commiefornia.

The first hour is good stuff. Spacey is good, the multiple strands are built up quite well and I would happily drink Saffron Burrows' bath water.

The last forty minutes are a mess. Rather than let all the strands of the story resolve themselves like Requiem For A Dream, it tries to meld them all together in a mish mash of stupid ideas.

A Gentleman in Moscow (2024)

Some hits, some misses in an otherwise worthy drama.

[6/10 · 2 June 2024]

I found this quite difficult to assess. The are some moments that are very dramatic, quite heartfelt and nicely constructed. However, the series falls down in several of the broad strokes that the production has decided to make in order to fit the running time of this limited series.

Firstly, the creators have gone for a largely Disneyfied, PG 13 telling of the story, which juxtaposed with the horrors of of the communist regime in the early part of the twentieth century, is odd. In the book, the eternal cheerfulness of our protagonist is the juxtaposition.

Also, I have to say that the casting was a problem for me. I have no problem with casting for 'modern' audiences in modern movies but in period pieces it automatically pulls me out of the moment and dilutes the drama.

The ending is badly underplayed.

Overall, worth a watch.

Poolman (2023)

So this is what Hollywood has become

[1/10 · 1 June 2024]

Everything, and I mean everything about this movie is egregiously bad. An offensive waste of time and talent.

What it is a forensic examination of pool maintenance filmed in the style of Chinatown.....I am not kidding.

I dare anyone to not feel bored by this after half an hour and I double dare them to watch to the end.

Yes Chris, of course you can make a movie with Danny DeVito and Annette Benning and a bunch of your other friends. And, of course you can write it and direct it having done neither of those things before.

The writing, direction, plot, cinematography, acting and editing seek only to confuse and annoy in equal measure.

This may be the worst movie ever made. And I'm still not kidding.

Perpetrator (2023)

Preposterous nonsense

[2/10 · 31 May 2024]

So, how would I describe it? How about, A pretentious, feminist, faux arthouse movie about, ......errrr....nosebleeds.....periods.....I have no idea.....something vaguely witchcrafty?

It's a modern feminist movie, so all the men are either useless, inept or deluded two dimensional characters . The women are, of course, capable, driven and a little more fleshed out.

I have no idea what the plot was, what the characters motivations were or what the point of imagery or faces changes were. None. The montages were pointless. The direction was experimental film school drivel. Our protagonist is a thief at the start which has bearing on the rest of the movie.

An absolute car crash of a movie. Avoid.

The Gathering (2002)

Truly awful and instantly forgettable

[3/10 · 30 May 2024]

How does it do it? How does it take Cristina Ricci, Stephen Dillane and Iaon Griffod (all probably spelt wrong) and not only tell a silly story really badly but also laughable acting performances from this cast?

Seriously, how do you fall into a church?

The plot is a veritable orgy of contrivances and conveniences. The memory loss of a ghost...... Seriously.

The direction is awful and fit for TV only, it is not cinematic at all. The cinematography is non existent. There is no suspense, no drama and the action scenes are laughable.

This is apparently drawn from a book that I have not read. And now, I never will.

Blast from the Past (1999)

From a nostalgia point of view, it's OK, I suppose

[5/10 · 30 May 2024]

Ok, so I'm twenty odd years late to the party with this movie. Nevertheless, the characters are paper thin and the story is as light and fluffy as a light and fluffy thing.

If throwaway popcorn schmaltzy movies are your thing then look no further. There is nothing in the way of great drama or subtext here except, Our characters are Adam and Eve (geddit).

Brendan Fraser is pretty good and Alicia Silverstone is, well, Alicia Silverstone, all slightly grown up from Clueless and just before her career tanked.

There's nothing to hate here but not much to love either in this 'fish out of water' tale of love in 90's L. A.

The First Omen (2024)

The problem with prequels is that you know how things end.

[5/10 · 30 May 2024]

And if you know how things, there is no real suspense. No real drama.

The First Omen makes a half decent stab at an origin story for the first movie but the problems with it are in the conception rather than the execution.

There are some annoying 'member berry moments, some key jangling moments that remind us of the the first and far superior film. The burning nun replaces the hanged nun. The split head priest replaces the impaled priest. The car crash guy replaces the decapitated guy. Really guys, write your own stuff.

The ending contradicts the lore as does the handing out of 666 marks Willy nilly.

It's ok nothing more.

Into the Labyrinth (2019)

Surprisingly excellent suspense drama

[7/10 · 29 May 2024]

Almost everything here is top notch. Two of my favourite actors, Dustin Hoffman and Tony Servillo.

The direction is quite suspenseful and the cinematography is first class. The music is brilliant, really adding to the feelings throughout the runtime.

So why did I give it only seven? I was going to give it nine with about a hundred minutes gone, but, the director decided to tack on another twenty minutes that simply do not add anything to the overall experience of the movie. I won't give anything away but the movie answers all your questions at that time and then starts again, which only makes things more complicated.

That said, a fabulous watch.

Brian and Charles (2022)

Fantastic, low budget with a big heart movie.

[7/10 · 27 May 2024]

This film could really teach the Hollywood, big budget movies a thing or two.

It's the simple tale of a lonely inventor who invents a robot out of what is lying around his dilapidated Welsh farm.

Simply told in a documentary style, the dreariness off the weather and the landscape play alongside the loneliness and awkwardness of our protagonist.

The equally socially awkward love interest is excellently done as is all the acting in the movie. Brian Earl, who steals all the scenes alongside Ricky Gervais in Afterlife and Derek, essentially plays the same character but dialled back a little.

Highly recommended.