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Reviews
Dead or Alive: Hanzaisha (1999)
Some over the top action bookends a dull uninteresting middle.
I absolutely love the beginning action compilation it's really incredible. The end action of this film after the one hour mark are really fun. It's what is in between these parts that just left me kind of bored. I'm not someone who wants action all the time but if you're not doing action in an action film I need some sort of plot of character development that keeps me invested but this film just kind of lacks that. I love most of Takashi Miike's other work but this one just wasn't interesting enough for me.
Phenomena (1985)
Looks great and sounds great but still not great.
I love a lot of the visuals in this film they are stunning. The music is all great even though some of it doesn't really fit completely with the tone of the scene. Despite these things that are good, the story is an absolute mess. The killer has no reason as to why she kills anyone other than the doctor and even that one doesn't make sense because the others don't feel justified. She was attacked before and her son is deformed so she kills little girls? What?!
The Red Shoes (1948)
Great film that I feel takes a bit too long in the third act.
I was going to give this film a 9/10 for most of the film. I found the pacing to be immaculate until just a little bit after the ballet. I feel the final act could've been done in a way that flows a little bit better. The first two acts are so entertaining even without being a ballet fan, but that final act while interesting does kind of drag. This film is absolutely gorgeous especially in the ballet sequence. I still suggest it extremely highly despite my issues.
Ibara no O (2009)
Inconsistent but interesting.
I found the story to be pretty interesting the whole way through the film. Everything else was kinda inconsistent. Sometimes the audio was incredible and then another random time I'd notice a stock sound effect being used or a sound effect peaking. Visually there are some amazing shots but then there are the weird CGI visuals that don't quite work. This is definitely a film I enjoyed despite its pretty obvious flaws. Its definitely worth checking out and it seems like something I would watch Again despite my mixed feelings.
The Lion King (2019)
Why?
A remake that is worse on every single level. The music, worse. The acting, way worse. The choice to make it "like a documentary" is one of the most nonsensical decisions I've ever heard. The animation is dull and boring. Yes it looks life like but that doesn't matter when in a film that I'm supposed to be emotionally connected to the characters. I can't connect to the characters because they don't show any emotion in their expressions. Disney you suck and Jon Favro you suck (misspelled but I don't care). *Seth Rogan Laugh*
Born of Fire (1987)
Interesting but definitely not for me.
I really enjoyed a large amount of the imagery in this film. The lighting is great, the colors are gorgeous, the locations are beautiful and the framing is great. That's really all there was for me. I guess if you can connect more with the mythology a large amount of this film references this may be an enjoyable experience. For anyone else there's really only visuals because honestly just about everything else is kinda dull.
Who Killed Captain Alex? (2010)
Masterpiece
It is truly da best of da best movie!!!!! Remember to watch out for Super Mafias and Tiger Mafias!!!! And kids remember to stay protected when beating the rat!!!
Kotoko (2011)
Just wow!
After seeing many of Shinya Tsukamoto's films, I always found many of them interesting yet they always seemed a bit much. This film to me took all of the good from his previous work and left all the negatives behind. This felt like a collaboration made in heaven Cocco and Shinya made a great pairing. I felt genuine emotion from this film. Even though at times it may be over the top it always finds its way back to being grounded. This is a confusing film but in a good way. I don't throw 10/10 around Willy nilly but this film deserves it.
The House That Jack Built (2018)
Was this meant to be a comedy?
A lot of people are talking about this film and how it's disturbing and don't get me wrong there were definitely some unsettling parts, but I found everything so unbelievable and absurd that it was hilarious. No I'm not liking this movie and an ironic way. I genuinely thought it was hilarious. Do I have a problem? Idk tbh. My only real issues were some overly repetitive parts, certain unsatisfying sequences, and literally a part where Von Trier praises his own movies. Definitely not as good as some of Von Triers other work mainly due to this film feeling like 2.5 hours of him praising himself. Honestly didn't mind that until it was way too on the nose.
Dhar Mann (2018)
Buy my merch!
Hey kids being poor is ok and also by the way by my new Dhar Mann merch!
These are just dull, uninspired, disconnected, and cringe videos that claim to be inspirational. If you can enjoy this unironically you might be a serial killer.
Evil Dead (2013)
Solid remake that's worth the watch.
I enjoyed this remake. I was honestly surprised as I love the original films. The reason this remake works for me is because it never seems to look down upon the originals. It also never felt the need to do exactly the same thing as the originals. I enjoyed the gore and the way the story was still there but in a different way. I really enjoyed the performance from Jane Levy. The other performances didn't blow me away but eh. Biggest issues were the overuse of stock sound effects and music; this is not the case for every scene but when it comes up it was annoying and really disappointing. This film also lacks that charismatic lead aka 'Bruce Campbell.' Visuals were really interesting at times aswell. And of course this film lacks the significance that the original has but honestly that's not really this films fault it just shows how great the originals are.
Red Notice (2021)
It was fine
I mean nothing great. The cast obviously has a lot of charisma but that can only make up for only so much lack of talent. Thought maybe this could've been a 4/10 and then they brought in Ed Sheeran and that was the last straw for me.
Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021)
The literal worst!
If you want a film that gives you the experience of cancer watch this, but if not don't waste your time. No comedy just references to other properties.
Lake Mungo (2008)
Chilling and filled with dread.
While it does feel a bit too close to David Lynch's Twin Peaks Fire Walk With Me it still managed to make me feel something that I haven't felt from a movie since I was a kid and that's genuine fear. There are shots from this film that I will never forget and they chilled me to the core. It starts slow but by the end I was taken on a roller coaster that I fear riding again.
Ammonite (2020)
Eh.
Really thought this could've been something great with its spectacular cast and its period setting. Instead I was left with a film that was just so average and didn't do anything to excite me whatsoever.
Malignant (2021)
A very mixed experience.
The first 25 minutes of this film are extremely annoying to watch. Terrible and inappropriate use of music, way too much editing, and some really weird and cheesy dialogue that is said way too seriously. After that point the film just goes bat shit with gore, action and a twist straight from Brian De Palma's Sisters or Basket Case. This film is very cliche in its music, dialogue and its style of scares. That action choreography and that interesting practical and special effects stopped me from hating this movie. In my opinion it's flaws balance out with its praises. This film ends up being a fun while overall average slasher.
The Unholy (2021)
Horrendous
A cliche mess with nothing unique to add to the horror genre. Felt like a mainstream faith movie with some horror where none of it was well executed. Only positive I can say is that some scenes don't look that bad.
Sorry to Bother You (2018)
Not great
I understand why people like this film I just have to say I very much did not enjoy it. It came of as a film that really just shoved its themes down my throat and didn't give me time to take in anything. This film was bat (bad word) crazy which really could've worked well but it felt like it wanted to be this deep piece but everything is extremely surface level. Also some of the comedic elements were extremely repetitive and got to be very annoying. There are things this film does well but it's flaws are so frustrating and annoying that I couldn't even appreciate the good.
1917 (2019)
Pretty average war film with a big gimmick.
The film is pretty much average in every way. It overused its music. The makeup is really good except for some reason the main characters look clean while everyone else looks like they were in a war. The story was really shallow and it felt like the distance these characters had to travel was not very far due to the one take shooting style. One take cinematography can work really well (Ex. Birdman) if it feels like it adds to the film instead it just comes off as a gimmick for this film and doesn't add to an already shallow film with nothing new to say.
2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)
Great film!
I love this film except I did feel there were some pacing issues at the beginning and some disconnect between the first two chapters and the rest of the film still fantastic!