BToothe Reviews

Star Trek: Insurrection (1998)

Not Subject to the "Odd-Numbered Curse of the Bastard Trek"

[8/10 · 12 December 1998]

I was very pleased with this film. Star Trek IX was a rich and heady brew of humor, adventure, and romance featuring lustrous performances from Stewart, Spiner, and the rest of the Enterprise crew. Of course, the greatest thrill was to watch the dastardly, delightful, and ever delicious F. Murray Abraham sink his feral incisors into the role of Ru'afo. While I generally wasn't WOW!ed by the special effects/ship shots, they were certainly very good. The finale, however, was abundantly WOW!icious. The holo-ship whilst in the lake was also WOW!ful. The scenery grabbed my breath time and time ag'in. The shots of Picard, Data, and Anij on the lake b'neath the snowy peaks of Bak'u-backcountry where overwhelmingly stunning. Aye, 'twas "Oh boy! Oberto!" good. Don't walk, run -- no, ENERGIZE your way to the theater now! and "Bring me mo' horses!", or should I say: Go see Star Trek IX!!!

The Island of Dr. Moreau (1996)

An Unfortunate Waste of Potential

[1/10 · 7 December 1998]

During the opening credits, I was very excited and looked forward to a movie that delivered, if not on the potential of the original story, then at least on the excitement the credits promised. What I watched unfold before me was an embarrassing, haphazard botch-job. When Brando's character was killed, I was very upset (he was the only character I felt much interest in or sympathy for), and wondered how the rest of the movie could possibly hold up. But when the cat woman got killed, the idiomatic camel's back was broken. What followed was horrible maelstrom. Both my friend and I were very close to leaving early (which I have never voluntarily done), but we both stuck it out, in what in retrospect could only be described as pure masochistic fashion. Again, this was a very embarrassing film considering the talent involved. I traditionally love Brando and Kilmer; Balk was another wasted treasure. I would have to point out that the cinematography was superb. As far as our director is concerned, he quickly moved on to the masterful Ronin (I didn't see the George Wallace film). Try "Island" out for as long as you care to, then go watch Ronin.

Cool as Ice (1991)

The Best Robert Van Winkle Movie Ever!!!

[10/10 · 26 November 1998]

Mr. Ice has scored a veritable grand slam with this classic comedy of manners, mayhem, and mojo. His funky antics and turntable stylings are sure to pump up the jam upon viewing. Watch for the zany homoerotic tension between the two cops. I also loved the "Gay Dogs" dance move from the dance club scene at the end. Robert Van Winkle is a comedic genius and a hip-hop legend. May his legacy live on in infamy! And yes....the "gays are amazed!" (They've indicated so in various communiques marked "Just add ice" sent to my Irvine post office box.)

And Ice, if you are reading this, please contact me. Aha!

Krippendorf's Tribe (1998)

The Worst Movie of All Time?...Perhaps!

[1/10 · 5 August 1998]

Richard Dreyfuss himself said in an interview before the release of this flick: "(begging)Please go see this movie!...If this movie doesn't do well, it'll be the end of my career." Yes, he actually said this. Very disappointing behavior from an actor so many people once enjoyed watching on screen. I for one am not surprised. Mr. Dreyfuss has been heading down into disgrace for many years now. I would not be immediately opposed to changing my opinion of Mr. Dreyfuss, but for this to happen, he must make some kind of comeback!! But I will watch with anticipation, albeit slight, for this comeback. By the way, did you see how pitiful his expression was when the camera panned by him in the most recent Oscars' past-award-winners-lineup?? The shame he must have been feeling for the horrid Krippendorf's Tribe was very clearly seen (I believe it was in theatrical release at the time of the Oscars).

Well, see this flick if you are 1) into masochism, or 2) into laughing at the downfall of a once great actor (although his ever having reached that level of greatness is highly debatable). Thank you good sirs and madams for your time. Any one who reads this, please feel welcome to email me: [e-mail] I am interested in forming an Anti-Krippendorf's Tribe Group.