June Foray: Rocket J. Squirrel, Natasha Fatale, Blue Fairy, Princess, Wicked Witch, Forgetful Girl, Teacher, Additional Voices

Quotes 

• [first lines] 

  Narrator : Well, the Kirward Derby has really been an on-again, off-again proposition. The latest "on" was when Rocky said...

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Put it on, Bullwinkle. Maybe you can tell us what time we'll arrive in Washington.

  [Bullwinkle puts on the Kirward Derby] 

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Easy. We'll figure the circumference of the standard wheel disc, times the rate of speed, computed sigma times the inverse square of the logarithm of the cosine and tangent.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Sure we will...

  Narrator : And the latest "off" was when Boris hurled a boomerang which neatly lifted the derby from Bullwinkle's dome, and began to return it to the villain.

• Narrator : Well, just as Bullwinkle predicted, their freight train rolled into Washington at 7:32-and-a-half, and our boys dashed into town to deliver the Kirward Derby to a responsible government agency. Unfortunately, by now it was 7:40 PM.

  Government Guard : Go away, we're closed for the day.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : But this is important!

  Government Guard : What is?

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : What we got in this hatbox is!

  Government Guard : Lemme ask you, will it explode before 10 AM?

  Rocket J. Squirrel : No, but...

  Government Guard : Will it melt?

  Rocket J. Squirrel : No.

  Government Guard : Will it go flat?

  Rocket J. Squirrel : No, but - !

  Government Guard : Then come back in the morning!

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Will somebody see us?

  Government Guard : I don't know, but I'll be off-duty then.

• [Boris, in disguise, finds Rocky and Bullwinkle lying in an alley] 

  Boris Badenov : Say! I don't want to be a Nosy Parkoff, but aren't you Rocky and Bullwinkle?

  Rocket J. Squirrel : That's right, who are you?

  Boris Badenov : Allow me to introducing myself: Hailfellow J. Backslap, official Washington greeter.

• [Boris poses as Hailfellow J. Backslap, official Washington greeter, and gives Rocky and Bullwinkle an enthusiastic, cartwheeling welcome] 

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Say! That's a pretty good greeting, all right.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Sounds like his welcome is waggin'.

• [recapping the events of the previous installment] 

  Narrator : And as if that weren't enough, they were flimflammed by Boris Badenov, who pretended to be an official greeter.

  Boris Badenov : [singing and aping guitar-playing]  Hello, hello, my friends, hello! With my guitar I sing to you...

  Rocket J. Squirrel : You don't have a guitar!

  Boris Badenov : I don't have an entertainment license, either.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : It's okay. That wasn't entertainment.

• Narrator : And Boris had taken them to the Little White House, which happened to be neither little, nor particularly white.

  Boris Badenov : But it is a house, and inside is the President!

  Rocket J. Squirrel : The President!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Oh, boy!

  Narrator : Yes, the President... of the "Let's Liquidate Rocky and Bullwinkle Club".

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Gee, we can give *him* the Kirward Derby!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : I don't know if it'll fit over all that hair.