Big Money Rustlas (2010)
Shaggy 2 Dope: Sheriff Sugar Wolf
Photos
Quotes
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[from trailer]
Bartender : What brings you to these parts, stranger?
Sugar Wolf : [slaps the bartender] I ain't no stranger to these parts.
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[from trailer]
Sugar Wolf : There is a new sheriff in town.
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Sugar Wolf : Get to steppin'.
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Sugar Wolf : [after autographing an Indian's tomahawk] Don't eBay that.
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Sugar Wolf : Well, I'll be a porcupine's dickhole.
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Dirty Sanchez : [as Sugar is about to drink water from the well] I wouldn't do that if I was you.
Sugar Wolf : What's it to you, hombre?
Dirty Sanchez : Look, man.
[Sanchez tosses the cup of water on the ground, where it starts hissing and steaming from deluding acid]
Sugar Wolf : Oh, shit!
Dirty Sanchez : It's better to drink in the saloon. Years ago, acid from the goldmine polluted our water. I mean, it's as polluted as a fat chick's ass after running a marathon with no underwear, man.
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Sugar Wolf : Okay, Bucky, that's it, friend. You're hired, partner. Welcome aboard. You're gonna be on guard from dusk 'til dawn right here in the jailhouse.
Bucky : Oh, that's some great news, sheriff. Now I just have one question, all right, does that include not getting shot?
[Sugar pimpslaps him]
Bucky : Oh, crap!
Sugar Wolf : Why, of course not, Bucky. Don't be stupid. No deputy nighttime watchman of mine is ever gonna get shot.
Bucky : Oh, I'm not bein' stupid, I'm just wondering how do I know I'm not gonna get shot?
Sugar Wolf : Well, Bucky, I'll make you one simple promise: if you get shot and die, I'll double your paycheck.
Bucky : Oh, man, that is great, sheriff! You got yourself a deal!
[both stand and shake hands]
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Sugar Wolf : There's something running afoul here in Mud Bug... and I intend to get to the bottom of it... it smells like the bottom of Bigfoot's asshole...
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Sugar Wolf : I got some carpet to munch.
Dirty Sanchez : Hey, can I ask you a question? Does the carpet match the drapes?
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Sugar Wolf : It must be Friday 'cause you gettin' straight-up PAID!
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Dirty Sanchez : [after finding Bucky riddled with bullet wounds] Bucky! What happened?
Sugar Wolf : He got shot. They killed him.
Dirty Sanchez : Oh, crap.
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Dirty Sanchez : Okay, now that looks good. Oh, I like the way that looks a LOT.
Sugar Wolf : I can't wait to spread this across your buns...
Dirty Sanchez : Yeah, it's gonna be great, man. I can't wait to taste it.
Sugar Wolf : It's gonna be delicious, right across your lips...
Dirty Sanchez : Yeah. Oh, God, melt in your mouth, you know?
Sugar Wolf : Dripping down your chin across your glistening chest...
Dirty Sanchez : Yeah, naturally. I mean, that's what it does, you know? That's what happens when you make good, delicious butter. You know?
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Sugar Wolf : Well, I guess that about sums that shit up. My father was nothin' but a big money rustla.
[howls]