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Reviews
Taintlight (2009)
Still better than Twilight
If you are looking for a Mel Brooks quality spoof, just keep looking. This is not for you. This movie is filled with toilet humor, bad jokes, and terrible acting. That being said, it does accomplish it objective of spoofing even more terrible source material and I think some of the bad acting is actually a spoof of the cast of Twilight. I found it to be enjoyable if you are capable of overlooking the low budget limitations. It looks like a bunch of buddies shot it on their mom's camcorder, but there were some good laughs in there. If you don't have the patience for unpolished independent films, I would suggest Vampire's Suck instead. I would still much rather watch Taintlight a thousand more times than watch another Twilight movie.
Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011)
Bayus ex machina
I say that because the Transformers are less the focus of the movie and more of a plot device. I have felt since the beginning of the series that Shia LaBoeuf had too much screen time in what should be a clash of the titans robot melee. The problem has gotten worse with each installment. In this one, they cram so many characters in there (Turturro, Mcdormand, Malkovich, Tudyk, Gibson, Duhamel) and try to give them all equal screen time. Somewhere in between all of their quips, they try to fit in this robot apocalypse that is happening around them. The Deceptacons show up and destroy some things, then the Autobots fight back and the entire cast must relocate to resume their quirky banter. There are scenes showing the special ops teams in action for extended periods of time that really seemed unnecessary (Is this Transformers of G.I. Joe?). I was really annoyed that Optimus Prime is tangled up for more than a half hour of the movie while the humans are trying to save the day, but then Megatron had an even smaller part. At times it resembled Michael Bay's Pearl Harbor, but with the Autobots showing up from time to time to bail out the military when things got too tough. The actual Transformer battles were exciting and looked great. I wish they could have focused more on that instead of all the other junk in this 2 1/2 hour advertisement for Mercedes, Lenovo, the Army, etc.