rachelaemmons Reviews

Morbius (2022)

Not terrible

[7/10 · 31 December 2022]

I watched this after all of the hype and the memes died down, waiting for a terrible crap fest. It honestly wasn't bad. In fact, it was almost good. I'm no movie critic and I'm probably easier to please than some, but I enjoyed it for the most part.

Some things were rushed and confusing and I did start to check my watch towards the end cause I was starting to get bored, so I guess there's my criticism. Also, I didn't like the ugly vampire faces.

I've seen some people complaining about the lack of blood and violence and I guess I get that since it's a vampire movie and all, but that's not really my thing, so it didn't bother me.

All in all, it wasn't great, but it was entertaining.

Persuasion (I) (2022)

Would have been perfect if it was set in modern times

[5/10 · 4 September 2022]

I'm really torn on this one. I did actually enjoy this movie, but at the same time, it felt really off. I feel like almost everything in this movie could have been the same with modern clothes and a slightly different setting and it would have been delightful. The entire cast was great and there were lots of funny and cute moments, but it didn't feel like a period film. It felt like a modern adaptation. It was weird.

The sad thing is that I've been waiting for an updated version of this for years. I loved the 1995 version, but hated the 2007 version. I thought this was going to be the one, but sadly, this one is a one timer. Time to watch the Ciaran Hines version again.

Mischievous Kiss (2008)

Different than your typical high school anime romance

[7/10 · 13 December 2021]

Cute love story that starts out like a typical high school romance and moves through college, nursing school, marriage, pregnancy, and parenthood. The first 7-8 episodes were really frustrating for me because the main girl is hopelessly in love with an awful jerk, but I was pleasantly surprised by his growth throughout the series. He was still a jerk for about 80% of the show, even after marriage, but I guess that's just his personality. Haha Overall, really enjoyable, satisfying, and sweet.

Holly Star (2018)

Really strange

[5/10 · 23 November 2021]

It actually started well. I enjoyed the first hour, then it took a nose dive and then, just ended. It's hard to explain.

The love interest angle was really forced. They kissed when they were five, so that means they have to fall in love later in life? The entire movie minus maybe ten minutes at the end, the main girl just saw him as a childhood friend. Then she chokes on a peppermint and she's in love! And what about the puppets? The treasure? The car? Her parents? Anything?!?!?!? Sigh, what a weird movie.

A Princess for Christmas (2011 TV Movie)

You've absconded with my heart!

[5/10 · 22 November 2021]

I watch these types of movies to get a good giggle, so this was successful in that sense. The plot is ludicrous and the casting was odd in some places. The guy who played Milo was obviously a grown man, he's just short! That alone was the most distracting part of the entire movie. But everyone else did the best they could with the awful script they were given. It honestly seemed to me like the cast got the script the day before the movie was shot. Everything was rushed and awkward. People went from grumpy to overjoyed in seconds, it was slightly terrifying. But hey, this is what I came here for, so I'm satisfied. Haha.

The Way of the Househusband (2021– )

Really silly

[7/10 · 27 October 2021]

I didn't mind the animation style and I thought it was hilarious how dramatic they made everything. If there wasn't so much bad language, I'd let my kids watch it. I understand why it's there, but everything else is so light hearted and silly that the language seems out of place. Other than that, it's just good, silly fun.

Maid Sama! (2010–2011)

Guilty pleasure, despite its flaws

[8/10 · 6 September 2021]

The premise is great and the show is funny and cute. Usui is actually kind of creepy and possessive, though. I don't understand why they wrote him that way. He needed to be bad at something and not be amazing at everything, desired by all women, popular, etc. It was just too much. Despite all that, I enjoyed watching and rewatching the show. The romance is cute and satisfying. I'd watch a second season, but it looks like this is it.

Toradora! (2008–2009)

Good, but predictable

[7/10 · 5 September 2021]

I'm embarrassed to admit that I watched the entire series in less than 24 hours, so I did enjoy it very much. I might be in the minority here, but I was actually hoping that the main characters would end up with different people. They definitely loved each other, but it always felt more like a brotherly/sisterly kind of love. Plus, Taiga was too mean and ungrateful to Ryuuji. She never apologized for yelling at him or hitting him or thanked him for cooking all of her meals, cleaning her apartment, doing her laundry, and all of the other thoughtful things he did for her. He was just way too nice to her and I wish he would have stood up to her crap more. Even so, I don't mind that they ended up together because I knew it would happen from the moment they bumped into each other in the hall in the first five minutes of the first episode, but it was still a little weird to me when they finally did. It would have been very interesting if they had done something a little different and surprised everyone.

I would have liked to see a little bit more of the fate of the other students and a more satisfying ending, but overall, I enjoyed it.

There was a lot of "fan service" in this (giant boobs, cleavage, almost naked buff guys, etc.), which is was unnecessary and distracting.

Overall, worth the watch. It's light hearted and fun.

InuYasha: The Final Act (2009–2010)

Satisfying conclusion

[8/10 · 12 August 2021]

I could have done with a little less sword drama and a little more romance, but at least we finally got some kissing! While I'm happy with the nice ending, it doesn't actually make any sense, but that's okay.

Christmas Wedding Planner (2017 TV Movie)

The end had me ROLLING

[2/10 · 16 December 2020]

Look, I watch a lot of cheesy Christmas movies. They're not great. I know this. But this was uncomfortable to watch. The lead actress spends 75% of the movie texting the plot to us. If I hear "love you muchly" or "I'm a fierce warrior!" one more time, I might barf.

This movie is bizarre. Like, so so weird. But if you can hang in there until the end, get ready to laugh your head off at the sheer stupidity.

This is not a two star film. I'm adding a star for the ending. It was like watching a train wreck and then a bunch of naked clowns jumping out of the train and making balloon animals for everyone.

Christmas with a Prince (2018 TV Movie)

My eyes and ears are bleeding

[1/10 · 6 December 2020]

I watch a lot of cheesy Christmas movies. They're dumb. They're predictable. But they're fun to watch. Usually. I've seen plenty of stinkers, but this one takes the cake. It was so awful, I wanted to run away screaming, but by golly I finished it. First of all, no one stays in the hospital for weeks for a broken leg. The prince could have easily just flown home to recover and I could have been spared this torture. Everything was so awful. The plot, script, acting, costumes, music, just everything. By the end of the movie, I had lost the will to live.

Falling for Christmas (2016 TV Movie)

Geriatric gold medalist

[5/10 · 3 December 2020]

Decent love story, awful skating, weird casting choice. From the very start of the movie, it was obvious that the actress was way too old to be portraying a famous figure skater. Most retire in their mid to late twenties and she was definitely in her thirties. And if she's a gold medalist, she should be doing triples left and right along with spinning, jumping, etc. I'm no expert, but that was pathetic. The romance was sweet, the daughter with the French cereal name was sweet. The mom was sweet. The stuff with the coach was stupid, but I guess they had to throw some drama in there somehow. Anyway, decent Christmas movie.

The Christmas Chronicles: Part Two (2020)

Truly bizarre. The real Belsnickel would have been a more interesting villain.

[4/10 · 29 November 2020]

The first movie was weird, but pretty enjoyable. My kids loved it and I'd probably let them watch it again, but this one was psychotic. Why is the bad guy even named Belsnickel if he's just a normal looking human/elf? And why does he speak English with a kiwi accent when all the other elves just speak Elvish? I get it that the real Belsnickel would have been super creepy and not family friendly. I'm just so confused that they used that name. That aside, while the movie was obviously centered around Christmas and Santa lore, I forgot a few times that it was a Christmas movie or had anything to do with the first movie. It was just strange. And don't get me started on that musical number. 2 stars each for Kurt and Goldie, the only good thing about this movie.

The Spirit of Christmas (2015 TV Movie)

Good until the last five minutes... then beyond stupid.

[1/10 · 20 November 2020]

My husband and I have been on a cheesy Christmas binge just for kicks and giggles and they are all usually goofy, predictable, and badly acted. This one had a different premise, a little mysterious and spooky at times, and the acting was mostly decent. I could tell I was enjoying more than the others because I didn't get bored or uncomfortable by cringiness and start looking at my phone. It was actually quite good, but then the ending happened and ruined everything. I get that the main character had never been in love and I want her to be happy, but this was just nonsensical. He had a fiancée and a baby that he had just found out about. She was the one that gave him the curse, or miracle, or whatever it was so that he could "learn" something. Okay, that part didn't make any sense, either, but it was because she had faith in him and loved him. And he loved her, too. But then, rather than let him move on and be with her and the child he never knew, she somehow has the power to give him a choice to stay on earth and be with another woman that he just met. It's honestly insulting. A far superior ending would have been for there to be some guy in the cleaning crew that came to the house at the end that looked exactly like Daniel to meet Miss main character (I just watched it and anger has driven her name from my mind) and say that he's always loved that house since it belonged to his great uncle or whatever and she smiles and the movie ends. If that had been the case, I might have given this 7 or 8 stars. Instead, I'm angrily giving it a 1 and shaking my fist and whoever's idea it was to ruin the movie with that nonsense.

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year (2008 TV Movie)

Henry Winkler is the best part of the movie

[5/10 · 12 November 2020]

This was okay. Cliché, yes, but mostly watchable. Henry Winkler is adorable and steals every scene. The love interest is a fun character, but a bit unbelievable. He just turned 30, but has had like a million jobs and traveled all over the world. Does he have money? Family? It's never explained. Now that he and the main character are together, is he moving in? He's basically homeless anyway. I'm assuming that she'll help him start his restaurant, but they never give these movies enough resolution. They just have the couple kiss and call it a day. Anyway, it was a decent movie. I would have rated it higher if they hadn't put in that bizarre scene where the guy sort of breaks into a toy store and then hits the owner with a trash can because he wouldn't open his store to give the lady a bike that she had previously paid for. They did a good job picking two hot people to fall in love, but there was zero chemistry between the two of them, so it wasn't that exciting to watch. Overall: Kind of cute, kind of meh. Henry Winkler is great.

The Christmas Cabin (2019)

Not the worst Christmas movie I've ever seen, but still pretty lame.

[5/10 · 11 November 2020]

Two cute people get snowed in and have to share a beautiful cabin all alone for three days and the most that happens is that they play Yahtzee and decorate a Christmas tree. Give me a break. I knew not to expect anything steamy because it's a Hallmark movie, but these guys just seemed like siblings having a good time. They didn't even seem remotely attracted to each other, so when they kissed at the end, it wasn't even exciting. My husband and I watch these movies for the sole purpose of making fun of them, so we've seen far worse. This one was just kinda there. If I fell asleep in the middle of it and caught the end, I wouldn't have missed anything.

Never Been Kissed (1999)

Loved it as a teenager, creeped out as an adult

[5/10 · 13 October 2020]

I was a freshman in high school when this movie came out and I LOVED it. Maybe it was because I had a huge crush on my English teacher and this was my way of fantasizing a hot teacher falling for one of his students. My 15 year old self didn't understand how unethical that would have been (not to mention illegal), I just thought it was soooo romantic. Fast forward 20 years to rewatching it with my husband and it was a completely different experience. The premise is still cute and the sad parts are still sad, but I couldn't get past how creepy that teacher was. All she did was read poetry and give smart answers in his class and he was smitten. While my young self got excited every time he gave her gooey eyes, my adult self was shocked that a teacher would act act so inappropriately. If he had been in on the secret, it would have been okay I guess. But all of that with his girlfriend and him getting jealous when she was with other teenagers (also unethical because she was interested in an underaged boy at one point) was just too much for me. I could barely watch it. It could have been a cute movie if it had been written a little bit differently, but wow.

The House with a Clock in Its Walls (2018)

Came for Jack, stayed for Cate

[4/10 · 8 October 2020]

I checked this movie out from the library with no knowledge of what it was. I thought it was a family movie with Jack Black and magic, so it sounded great to me. It's a LOT darker than I expected. If you like scary, creepy stuff, you might enjoy this. In fact, I did enjoy most of the movie, but I didn't like the evil parts. I'm very sensitive to that stuff. Fun, silly magic is fine, but dark evil magic is too creepy and scary for me. I could also have done without the griffin diarrhea and the puking pumpkins. Jack Black and Cate Blanchett were great and I liked the little boy as well. Personally, I wouldn't recommend this to anyone because of the creepy parts, but I did find the rest of the movie interesting and fun.

Bill & Ted Face the Music (2020)

Silly and fun

[8/10 · 16 September 2020]

Look, this film isn't going to win any Oscars. I don't think anyone ever expected that. It's Bill and Ted! It's a goofy time traveling adventure movie and it was fun to watch. I LOVE the old movies and have seen them many times. I'll probably watch this one a few more times. No, it isn't how I imagined Bill and Ted's life in their 50s to be like. They were amazing musicians at the end of the second movie and were world famous. But I was willing to put that aside and see what this story had to offer. The historical figures switching places was silly and fun. I'm not sure if I should have laughed that hard at Jesus and the apostles rocking out at the end, but it was goofy. I loved all of the time traveling with Bill and Ted as well as their daughters. Yes, they should have been their sons, but it's not that big of a deal. In the end, it was Bill and Ted who wrote and played the song that saved the universe, not their daughters. I guess they were destined to form the band that saved the universe. Did we need this movie? Not really. Was it fun to watch? Absolutely! Just try not to over analyze it and enjoy the ride.

Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure (1989)

Most triumphant!

[10/10 · 8 September 2020]

To get us ready for Bill and Ted Face the Music, my husband and I decided to rewatch the first two films and it was most excellent. I loved this movie as a kid, but it was 50 times funnier as an adult. We laughed from start to finish. The message is actually really poignant as well. Be excellent to each other!

Diary of a Wimpy Kid (2010)

Better than the book, but that's not saying much.

[7/10 · 27 July 2020]

My boys and I read the book together and they howled with laughter from start to finish. It was definitely not my cup of tea, but they are kids and I'm a lame adult, so that's not surprising.

I have to say that the movie improved on a lot of the things in the book that annoyed me the most. Rodrick is way funnier and more likeable. Greg, while still selfish, superficial, and a terrible friend, at least feels bad about it and sort of apologizes and makes up for it in the end. Rowley is sweet and dorky and I felt bad for him for most of the time. The parents are still clueless and annoying, but that's the stereotype in these kinds of stories, so whatever.

Besides the disgusting "cheese touch" plot line and the over the top middle school stereotypes, the film was actually pretty funny and enjoyable.

Aladdin (2019)

So much wasted potential

[4/10 · 9 January 2020]

I don't mind the idea of doing live action retellings of our favorite childhood movies if they retell them in a new and interesting way, but I don't need to see the exact same movie, just live action-ized.

This could have been amazing. The colors were beautiful. The sets, costumes, etc. were great. I would have loved to see a version where everyone has the correct kind of accent and the music was more middle-eastern. I would have preferred that they left out the singing altogether and just did some cool dances. The genie could still be funny, but a funny middle-eastern guy. Don't get me wrong, Will Smith was pretty much the only enjoyable thing about this movie. But mixing middle eastern music with hip hop was an odd choice, even though the dancing was fun. And the whole added character arc with Jasmine was so forced and predictable. I could go on, but I'll just leave it at that.

Three stars for Will Smith and one bonus star because Aladdin was hot.

A Christmas Cruise (2017 TV Movie)

Awkward, predictable, and just plain awful

[1/10 · 20 December 2019]

Oh man, where to begin? I didn't mind the main character or the premise. Sure, it was predictable, but it could have still been enjoyable. It just wasn't at all. The main character (I already forgot everyone's names, so bear with me) is divorced, overworked, and lonely. To make her feel even worse, she has the most annoying co-workers imaginable (reindeer antler headbands, Christmas cookies, practically jumping up and down with Christmas spirit) and her mother is obsessed with her funding a man. Then you meet her "best friend" (nothing you say to me can convince me that these two remotely like each other) who is newly divorced and super horny, who invites her to go on a Christmas cruise with her to find boyfriends. She says she can't take off work for it, but then her boss conveniently tells her that he wants her to find some way to write an article about finding romance during the holidays and the cruise is the perfect place to find material. The rest of the movie goes exactly the way anyone would expect it to go. She starts writing the article, meets a man herself, falls in love, goes home, quits her job, and brings him home to her mother. The predictability isn't the problem, though. It's the cringey dialogue, the unlikable characters (ALL of them, except MAYBE Vivica A. Fox), the awkward, forced romance (her horny best friend finds a boyfriend the instant they get on the ship and are happily ever after with no drama or conflict of any kind), and so much more. But I'm rambling now. I enjoy a cheesy romance movie every now and then, but this was so, so bad. One good thing I guess is that I laughed quite a bit.

We Wish You a Turtle Christmas (1994 Video)

Awesomely bad

[10/10 · 7 December 2019]

I'm rating this not on quality, but on how much I enjoyed it. My kids laughed from beginning to end and I never stopped smiling, either. Sure, the costumes are horribly done and the songs are cheesy beyond belief, but that's part of the magic of this little known gem. Just grab some popcorn or some pizza and have a good 22 minute laugh. And have a great year filled with pizza with cheese, whipped cream, and pickles!

Pete the Cat: A Very Groovy Christmas (2018 TV Movie)

Cute story for little kids

[7/10 · 7 December 2019]

I like the narrator's soothing voice and the fact that the show is far less annoying than a lot of other shows for kids out there. The Christmas special is more moralistic than anything, which is fine. I don't care either way whether the squirrel has two dads or not, as long as it's handled well. Whatever your feelings on same-sex marriage are, it exists and we need to respect that. It was pretty subtle. No one turned to the screen and said, "that's right kids, Sally has two dads and that's totally groovy" or anything like that. I don't even think my kids noticed or cared, so I just left it at that. What we ended up talking about was the fact that Grumpy Toad was being selfish and that he learned that Christmas is about giving and not getting.