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dpfrey
Reviews
Predator Island (2005)
This is as bad as it gets
This is one of the worst movies I have ever seen. The highlight of the movie is a comparison between the smell of natural gas and a dirty vagina.
The acting is pathetic. I know acting is hard work and stuff, but that's why it should be left to real actors. Watching these people act is like watching Michael J. Fox perform brain surgery. It's shaky at best.
One of the other comments would have you believe that the movie is saved by the acting talents of Dan Gordon as Chris. Only Dan himself or maybe his mother could believe that was good acting.
The special effects in this movie were terrible. The worst special effects were for the gas explosion in the lighthouse. It looked like someone was shining an orange light up from the bottom of a model constructed from a refrigerator box. Sure there was a little bit of computer animation layered over top, but it didn't help. I suspect that the special effects on this movie were created and rendered using a single Amiga computer from the late 80s.
Ocean's Twelve (2004)
Terrible
I gave this movie a 1 out of 10 because I have seen it twice and I hated it even more the second time because I knew that the whole thing was just the director waving his dick in your face and then the big surprise ending is unfathomably stupid. I was unfortunate enough to watch this movie a few days before leaving on a flight to Europe. The really bad part is that it was also shown on my flight to and from Europe (I was gone for 2.5 months).
You know what, if they stole the egg on the train, show me that in the movie. Don't show me unrelated crap for 90% of the movie and then give me the 2 minute synopsis of what really happened at the end. This movie is a complete and utter waste of time. Anyone who says otherwise is sucking George Clooney's cock.