Nothing new here... just a run of the mill attempt to merge CGI anf live action with limited success. Plotholes galore in this flick! A lot of missed potential in the story, the effects, and the dialogue... What a Shame!
Reviews
19 Reviews
Sky Sharks
(2020)
Garbage...
6 September 2021
I thing the writers, producers, director, and anyone involved it making this movie should have gotten better drugs beforehand. A better title would have been "What Were We Thinking?" or perhaps "Never make a Movie Before Finishing Kindergarten". Pass, run, ignore, save yourself!
From the Depths
(2020)
A movie to fall into deep sleep with...
6 September 2021
After surviving this movie I am plagued by nightmares of never recovering the time it took to watch it, and hallucinations of visits from family and friends, who died of boredom trying to watch this film. It is easy to forget that this is a story about the effects of a shark attack when there are few scenes including sharks.
Venom
(2005)
Watch it before you walk in the swamp. The is a creepy flick!
11 June 2021
Nighttime in the LOUISIANA SWAMP is a creepy enough setting on its' own, but add the snakes, voodoo, and an imposing tow truck driver with a slew of sins inserted into his soul. Why was this not a hit????? Venom was released in the wake of Hurricane Katrina and the promotional trailers were overshadowed by this disaster. The studio responsible was sold soon after the release of this movie, and I have to think that no one wanted to believe this could have put the studio o a successful track of a great possible series of movies with "Mr Jingles" staling the swamps. Creepy atmosphere, setting, villain, characters and story... What more could you ask for? I absolutely love horror movies, and this is one of my favorites. Decent acting, story and character development in this tale along with the way this villain blends into the scenery before striking kept me on the edge of my seat.. I was so disappointed that this did not go into sequel as it was a promising vehicle for a new serial villain. Michael Myers has the neighborhood, Jason has the campgrounds, the Creeper has the backroads, but Ray Sawyer has the swamp.
Stand by Me
(1986)
The Body read it... then see it!
1 October 2020
Wow! this movie sure woke up some memories, My friends and I walked the tracks from Coventry, RI to Sterling, Ct for many years. The tracks are gone, as well as the train, but the trail and the memories remain. I had some great friends in those days, but life gets in the way, and we don't get together anymore. This is adolescence in the days before video games and internet. Boy do I miss them...
Jaws
(1975)
OMG! Wow!
1 October 2020
This is the movie that made the White Shark GREAT! I always wondered what was just below my feet in the ocean, and here it is! JAWS. I read the book before they announced the movie, and loved the book. That summer EVERYTHIING was geared towards sharks. You didn't feel safe swimminf in the pool after watching this movie. It wasn't just a BLOCKBUSTER movie... it was an experience. If I ever lose my memory the high point of my life will be getting to experience Jaws for the first time more than once!
Fantastic Voyage
(1966)
Fantastic!!!!
1 October 2020
James Bond, The Thunderbirds, Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea, The Incredible Shrinking Man, all rolled into one movie! Batman was on TV, The Munsters... times were great and so were movies. Good FAMILY movies with good stories. The effects ight seem cheesy when compared to modern day, but this was IT in 1966. It was as close to the real thing as you could get! Gee I wish they made movies like this again...
The Birdmen
(1971 TV Movie)
Where are these movies today?
1 October 2020
What a great movie and story. A story based on the Colditz Castle Prisoners of war tale. Believable characters because they are based on real people. This isn't your average escape movie, as it highlights the inventiveness of the human spirit when held captive. This is a prime example of how to tell a story through a movie, No "reimagined" tales, no artsy representations of what happened... just a solid telling of a story that is amazing, and at the same time unbelievable. A good ensemle of actors that play very well as a group of men thrown together in a dire situation, and end up striving toward a common selfless goal. This is a movie that still stands up today, and I only wish there were a remastered copy of this movie out there. Great fodder for a remake...and I mean "REMAKE" not a reimagined story full of unnecessary fluff. I am just not sure that there are actors today who could be put in a film together and not have their egos ruin the production. This is one of those films that you watch familiar stars all "play nice" together, and it made a great movie that I was happy to find on DVD after first seeing it almost 50 years ago as a little kid. I love movies, and I must say that this move is one of my favorites from yesteryear. Beyond this being a great film it is a great story. Ingenuity, planning, and the inventiveness to overcome insurmountable odds and successfully accomplish the impossible is the theme that stands the test of time. This is a story of a time when men were men, and thses men would put others before themselves without hesitation for a cause.
Wolfman
(1979)
on one hand...
3 January 2020
On one hand this movies is a stinker, and on the other hand it was free on Shudder. If I had a third hand I would grab the remote turn off the TV and try and forget the time I wasted attempting to watch this crap. This movie had all the horror of an episode of Joanie Loves Chachi.
Crocodylus
(2017)
Oh please let me leave a zero star rating!!!!
8 August 2019
No spoilers here... just let the movie spoil on its own. Absolutely horrible movie! Bad script, bad acting, bad effects, ...just an all around BAD movie! I can't even tell you where it went bad, because it started out that way and just got worse! I am hoping that I can leave a zero star rating so that the actual one star movies are able to distinguish themselves from crap like this. How anyone could give this movie more than one star (and there would need to be a close relative in it before I did) is so far beyond possible for a viewer that was conscious that it would be like using a goldfish to flim a Meg sequel. Good premiss... but it thoroughly missed the mark. It isn't even good enough to say that it was so bad it was funny. This movie is a trajic waste of money, film, and time. Avoid it at all cost.
The Legend of Halloween Jack
(2018)
Halloween Jack should have stayed in the grave.
21 October 2018
Way too much muddled dialogue from a cast of below average actors. Why didn't someone tell the people who made this movie that it is so slow moving and boring that it is like watching the neighbors vacation movies from a trip to a knitting festival. If you want to get some rest on a Saturday afternoon just pop this gem in the player, and you will be asleep in no time. It could have been a good movie if it had better actors, writers, a plot, and a less goofy looking villain. No spoilers in this review, as I couldn't spoil this movie by writing it down line for line! Watching the movie was the biggest spoiler, as I would have preferred watching this DVD melt in my fireplace over watching it play on my TV. Big PASS on this POS film. If you see a rating higher than one star on this check to see if the reviewer is in the film or related to someone in the film. I have seen some terrible movies, but this movie makes them look like Oscar winners. I want to make a movie called "The Legend of The Legend of Halloween Jack" it will be about how people who watched this film mysteriously died of complete boredom.
Accident
(I) (2017)
Something was missing...
27 January 2018
...Like a story, a plot, some character development, motives behind what was going on, a middle, and an end. What a piece of crap this was! By reading the box cover and reading this review, you know as much about it as I do... and I just watched it! That was the biggest ACCIDENT! ...watching it. I've had better times sitting in a car waiting for the police after a REAL accident than I did watching this garbage. Let's hear it for a director that can't tell a proper story. One star was as low as I could go!! So I rated it much higher than I would have otherwise. The best part was when the credits rolled... because it was over.
Jeepers Creepers III
(2017)
Sad to say I wanted more for the wait
26 September 2017
Warning: Spoilers
Nothing to write home about. Entertaining, but fell far short of what it had the potential of being. A few new gags here and there, but nothing enlightening, Ties the two previous movies together well, but that is about as far as it goes. The story was predictable, and doesn't answer any questions the viewer may have from the 1st two films. I wanted more backstory, as did the rest of the people in the audience, but no explanation of the Creepers origins are even hinted at. If this franchise is going to continue it might be a good idea to give some history, and fill in a few blanks about what the creeper actually is. There were some good moments in the film that looked as though things were going to be cleared up, but in the end stayed the course and left us wanting more... anything more than watching the little hair piece stay glued to the top of Brandon Smiths' head while we try to get past the who, what, when, and why of the creeper. Not my favorite of the three to say the least. I left the theater with a lot of disappointed people. We all arrived early, and sat chatting about how excited we were to finally see part 3, and agreed that if there is a part 4 after this we would all wait for a review before buying a ticket for a one night only special event showing that wasn't worth the price of admission. It had such potential... but didn't deliver.
David and Goliath
(2015)
I don't understand how ANYONE can give this movie more than three stars.
10 March 2017
Acting was so so... Costume dept was a joke! Red sweat pants, a tablecloth, and a salad bowl spray painted gold for a helmet. Story... well it isn't like we haven't seen it before. Casting... no one I've ever seen before... Setting... possibly Todd Hoffman's old land after the Gold Rush crew left. Dialogue... to say it was amateurish script writing would be a compliment to this movie, and an insult for amateur script writers,
This is a movie that causes the eyes to glaze over and stop focusing as the eyelids close. I liked the story much better before the movie and the lame attempt that was made to put it on a screen.
...and I started out giving it a 5 out of ten for telling a bible story, so before those points were tallied I would have given it a -3 out of 10. It was painful to watch, but I dropped the remote control while slipping in and out of consciousness, and left it on because the dog was enjoying the light from the TV.
This is a movie that causes the eyes to glaze over and stop focusing as the eyelids close. I liked the story much better before the movie and the lame attempt that was made to put it on a screen.
...and I started out giving it a 5 out of ten for telling a bible story, so before those points were tallied I would have given it a -3 out of 10. It was painful to watch, but I dropped the remote control while slipping in and out of consciousness, and left it on because the dog was enjoying the light from the TV.
Embedded
(2012)
Worst movie I have seen so far....
11 October 2016
Oh my God! This movie was awful... It needed actors, a director, and an actual story. Biggest spoiler I could give on this movie? IT WAS SO GOD AWFUL THAT IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN EMBEDDED IN A HOLE SOMEWHERE INSTEAD OF MAKING ITS DEBUT ON DVD!!! No real actors here folks! Just a lame attempt at taking a shot at making a movie. Did they ask for volunteers from the local PTA or grocery store staff to be in this movie? ...because it sure does looks like it! I am not sure how anyone could give this movie more than 1 star rating, as I would have given in less if it were possible. There is a saying that 1000 monkeys with typewriters will eventually write a sentence... I don't think they had enough monkeys working on this script. Amateurish attempt at a movie at its best, a big waste of time, horrible, this is why children shouldn't play with video cameras.
The Shallows
(2016)
Special effects were incredible!!
23 June 2016
Go see it and leave your opinions at home. I felt there was not one single scene where I thought "Yeah. that was a cheesy shark effect". Quite a few "jump out of your seat" moments that makes this a really intense and entertaining movie. You spend a lot of time scanning the water behind Nancy for a clue of where the shark might be. If you like adventure, suspense, and horror, this is the movie to see this weekend! Blake Lively played the part of Nancy well, and you suffer along with every drop of blood she loses. I haven't had such a good time at the movies in a long time. It came out one day early at the local cinema, and I just had to see it. Very real and believable special effects makes this the shark movie that now sets the bar for all other shark movies. I rated it 8 out of 10, because of a few plot holes that could have been patched fairly easy, but were overlooked. This movie shows what can be done with a good special effects team and the attention to detail that sets this movie apart from others released over the past few years. If this movie causes a resurgence of animal attack movies I for one am ready for the ride, because if they are as well done as "The Shallows" I will have a reason to see things on the big screen instead of waiting for the DVD.
The superheroes are the reviewers who lead us to believe this movie deserves 4 stars at most! CRAP MOVIE!
9 April 2016
What kind of valid rating can be constructed of reviewers who agree that this movie was not the best, yet give it a ten star vote on the rating system? Are you trying not to hurt anyone's feelings, or damage the self esteem of the people responsible for putting this crap on the screen? Review after review relates that this is not the best movie, yet they rate it 10 stars? This is like observing an Olympic diver bounce off the board and perform a "bellyflop", and give a 10 score for the height of the splash! Where do these votes come from? Someone please pay me a few bucks so that I can throw a few bogus reviews out there. I can write things such as:
"IT IS AN OVERLY LONG, BORING PIECE OF WORK WITH NO REAL STORY, BUT IT WAS JUST WHAT I NEEDED TO GET SOME SLEEP IN A PUBLIC THEATER! 10 STARS"
"IT WASN'T AS GOOD AS MOS 5X, BUT SO MUCH BETTER THAN WD40! 9 STARS!"
"THE HEAT IN THE THEATER FELT GREAT, AS IT WAS BELOW ZERO TEMPERATURE OUTSIDE! 10 STARS!"
"I REALLY ENJOYED THE PREVIEWS OF COMING ATTRACTIONS! 10 STARS!"
How does this crap get produced? A great deal of special effects, but they forgot to add a decent cohesive story. My friends tell me "You must be a fan of both universes to understand the movie" I say "Bulldinky!!" All the buildup and publicity, the secret chatter about the production... What a load of horse crap that was. THIS FILM IS A TOTAL WASTE OF 2 1/2 HOURS!!! I would have liked it better if it were 1 1/2 hour long, because I feel that I would not have wasted the extra hour that I did waiting for the movie to suddenly "Get Better..." before it ended. I read both Superman and Batman comics as a kid, and let me tell you, if the comics back then were half as bad as this movie is now I never would have bought another DC Comic. If there is a comparison of DC and Marvel these days it is that DC Comics has a problem telling a story if it isn't referenced in a book as an inside joke known only to the select few people who read the small print.. Waste of time, talent , money, effort, and blank film. Steer clear of this piece of crap movie, and wait until something better comes along like King Kong vs Curious George, because you will never recover the time you spend trying to stay awake for this gem...
"IT IS AN OVERLY LONG, BORING PIECE OF WORK WITH NO REAL STORY, BUT IT WAS JUST WHAT I NEEDED TO GET SOME SLEEP IN A PUBLIC THEATER! 10 STARS"
"IT WASN'T AS GOOD AS MOS 5X, BUT SO MUCH BETTER THAN WD40! 9 STARS!"
"THE HEAT IN THE THEATER FELT GREAT, AS IT WAS BELOW ZERO TEMPERATURE OUTSIDE! 10 STARS!"
"I REALLY ENJOYED THE PREVIEWS OF COMING ATTRACTIONS! 10 STARS!"
How does this crap get produced? A great deal of special effects, but they forgot to add a decent cohesive story. My friends tell me "You must be a fan of both universes to understand the movie" I say "Bulldinky!!" All the buildup and publicity, the secret chatter about the production... What a load of horse crap that was. THIS FILM IS A TOTAL WASTE OF 2 1/2 HOURS!!! I would have liked it better if it were 1 1/2 hour long, because I feel that I would not have wasted the extra hour that I did waiting for the movie to suddenly "Get Better..." before it ended. I read both Superman and Batman comics as a kid, and let me tell you, if the comics back then were half as bad as this movie is now I never would have bought another DC Comic. If there is a comparison of DC and Marvel these days it is that DC Comics has a problem telling a story if it isn't referenced in a book as an inside joke known only to the select few people who read the small print.. Waste of time, talent , money, effort, and blank film. Steer clear of this piece of crap movie, and wait until something better comes along like King Kong vs Curious George, because you will never recover the time you spend trying to stay awake for this gem...
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