This movie had a good concept. It was a tried-and-true concept, but reliable. That being said, there were two major issues w/ the movie. Th first was the poor pacing. Everything was very boring for the first 3/4ths of the movie. The final quarter of the movie felt rushed to me. Its comparable to fire work shows that slowly lets off a few non-remarkable fireworks and then hurriedly light them all off at the very end. The second issue is the godawful acting. To be fair, the script didn't give the actors & actresses much to work with, but they need to go back to acting class. The cast also didnt appear to have chemistry amongst one another or something, so the final product looked just that much more forced. There are many good movies out there to watch or re-watch. I would skip this one.
Reviews
21 Reviews
Jailbait
(2000 TV Movie)
Kevin Mundy is a great actor!
27 July 2022
I remember being 14 or 15 when this premiered and I thought it was hilarious. Yes, I can understand how the slapstick humor may not meet every viewer's taste or version of humor, but, if you take it for what it is- a teen comedy- then it's entertaining and provides a parody of high school stereotypes. Kevin Mundy made the movie for me.
Noise in the Middle
(2020)
Demonizes People on the Spectrum
7 February 2021
While the acting is certainly top-notch and convincing, thus evoking the intended emotions from the audience, there are other issues. A frequent complaint about the horror genre is how it demonizes and/or stereotypes people with various mental health diagnoses and this film is no exception. Autism Spectrum Disorder is portrayed as a complete burden and somewhat insinuates that those who suffer from it may be dangerous or even susceptible to evil. Another good thing about this film is that it kept you guessing. However, I still had some unanswered questions at the end of the movie.
The Legend of Lucy Keyes
(2006)
Slow Moving
15 April 2020
I was tempted at many times to shut off this movie as it was very slow moving and, although I was intrigued at moments throughout due to the sense of foreboding, it didn't allow me to connect with many of the adult characters and- since I tend to watch movies on Amazon Prime late at night- it wasn't enough to hold me in suspense as much as I had hoped (I have been pleasantly surprised before). Towards the end of the movie I did start to feel grateful that I hadn't switched it off. One good selling point is that it is based on a local legend (apparently), so if you are from the area in which said legend did allegedly take place, I would recommend it for you. But this is NOT a masterpiece. That being said, it does beat some of the stinkers you get for free on Amazon prime.
The Haunting of Sharon Tate
(2019)
Bad Acting
20 November 2019
I would still give this terrible movie a one star review regardless of whether or not it was based on true events (which it was). Hilary Duff was speaking in a strange accent throughout the entire film and her acting couldn't have been worse if she had been on the psychedelic drugs popular in that era. She tried to talk all breathy, fluttering her giant false eyelashes and rubbing her prosthetic baby bump in a desperate attempt to emote what her character (Sharon Tate) may be feeling in that moment. During the: ahem: action scenes (if you can call them that), you could tell she was trying so hard to still look sexy for the audience that it was actually distracting to the viewer. Stick to Lizzy McGuire!
20 Dakika
(2013)
It Just Sucks You In
12 December 2018
As another reviewer mentioned, the slow did get off to a sligjtly slow start. It began to really hit its stride after episode 3 or 4, but when it does, it REALLY captivates you. The show is extremely well-acted, you feel an intense emotional connection to the characters (whether it be extraordinary empathy, anger towards them and- sometimes- you swing back and forth between bitterness and sympathy based on the episode/situation) and it keeps you wanting more. This is not like some TV shows or movies where you guess exactly what the ending will be and who the culprit is. I have yet to complete it but I am so excited to just be following the story line. Why not give it 10 stars? The woman playing Melek is gorgeous and a great actress yes, but why must every hair be in place and her (albeit natural looking makeup) be applied during her prison scenes? With the exception of when they made her run in the rain during an earlier episode, she is perfectly put together. In a REAL prison, ESPECIALLY if they are singling you out, you will not get access to the kind of hair care products needed to keep her tresses in top notch condition. Look at some of the other inmates. Anyone in her position would be looking more than slightly haggard (yes even despite her natural beauty). That is the only thing that is detracting from the plot. It is unrealistic. She would be emaciated, have chapped lips, etc. But that is a minor burden since the show is so great in every other respect.
Ice Loves Coco
(2011–2013)
Trashy & Boring
26 April 2018
This reality television show about the former pink and his ex "top :ahem: 'Girl' turned wife is detrimental to society- especially the young women who are flipping through the channels and end up settling on this trash. The unconscious message sent to America is that all you need to do to land a TV deal is to have giant fake breasts/butts/lips/hair extensions/designer apparel and be married to someone with any form of celebrity. It doesn't matter if they do not have brains or what they had to do to themselves to get to the top. Sell your dignity to strangers? That's okay! It will all pay off! No talent? No problem! I remember being in the hospital for a week and I came across the episode where she wanted to be a singer. She went into the studio and started moaning orgasmically into the microphone before breathily moaning "shoes! I love my shoes!" Thanks to Jessica Simpson for paving this road that gets trashier and trashier throughout the years.
Dream House Nightmare
(2017 TV Movie)
The Epitome of a Lifetime Movie
30 January 2018
Warning: Spoilers
Okay, well I can't say that the movie is boring, but I WILL say that it paints each and every character in a villain/hero dichotomy to the point of transparency. The protagonist (aka the woman who is being stalked by the woman she outbid) is just portrayed as an absolute ANGEL. She can do nothing wrong, everything she touches turns to gold, she is a former teacher of kids w/ special needs, she wins over the autistic (?) daughter of her 'nemesis' (in addition to charming her entire new neighborhood) and flawlessly deflects pretty much any sabotage directed at her. It was a classic movie in which every character is one dimensional, good and evil are firmly delineated and you just KNOW how the ending will turn out. The characters have next to no depth and not much thought must have went into this script. I disliked how they villanized the battered woman who has been placed into a caretaking role by fate. She had birthed a daughter with special needs, and while she did love her daughter she had her share of frustrations with the day to day care for her. Furthermore, her husband (who had been abusive and quick tempered prior to this) was injured in a work accident leading to an addiction to narcotic painkillers. Predictable.
Curse of Mesopotamia
(2015)
I Suspect Fraud: Chapter 3
14 December 2017
I have honestly seen better acting in pornographic movies. In fact, the crappy far-fetched plot, the stilted acting (and in some cases over-acting) and the "exotic" mansion & location, I had to double check my purchase to make sure I wasn't in fact, watching an X rated movie. Maybe it would have been more interested if I had been though. It felt like an eternity for this movie to end with it's predictable plotlines, horrific acting and inane script. I BOUGHT this drivel (I was probably buzzed) after seeing the positive ratings on IMDB and, at the time, I did think it's synopsis sounded okay. Joke was on me.
The Cropsey Incident
(2017)
Unwatchable
20 November 2017
This movie is so terrible. I am not really done watching the movie and I am almost considering turning it off, which I rarely do. The lead actress had the most grating voice in the world- so if you suffer from migraines please skip this. This is cheesy but not in a cheeky way or "so bad its good". It's about a bunch of unlikable characters (who are played by talentless hacks) who present themselves as activists for social justice but they really just go around terrorizing people to feed their own egos. (Example- finding a victim of a beating in an alley and forcing him to say stupid things on camera to their liking and stopping only when they hear police sirens). You do not care for the ANY of the characters, the actors voices hurt your ears and it has cheap special effects. I think they actually used a cap gun to simulate gunfire.
Entertaining
17 November 2017
I am pretty generous with my reviews. I really liked the first one except I wanted more of an explanation of 'Bad Ben' and the ending and, with the second two, I got one. However, this is DEFINITELY a horror- comedy. DO NOT go in with the expectation of being scared out of your wits. I found myself genuinely laughing at parts. It was very entertaining. For example, Tom's cussing at the beginning of the documentary. Jacquie: "Tell me what happened here" Tom: "I lost my f*ing money." And when the cameraman was tearfully giving his possible last testimonial "I don't know why everyone calls me Schmiddy, my name is Tristan Carmichael! I'm so sorry I was a Paranormal Investigator- what a stupid job!" Also, you do not know what to predict for an ending so you do get drawn in. No one is particularly likable, so by horror standards, do they all die?
The Snare
(2017)
A Bit Biased...
31 October 2017
BUT I cannot with good faith give this film a high ranking based on the techniques that that filthy monster C.A Cooper did to the poor talent. It is all in the trivia section. He basically scared one of the actors half to death w/ spiders yet screamed louder than my 3 year old when someone said he had one on his back. The only stars given are for the good acting on behalf of the cast. But then again, when the director forces you to basically live like the captives that their roles call for, how can you really fake it?
Emma
(III) (2016)
Emma
8 September 2017
How in the world did this score so high? The actress playing Emma did a great job, yes, but it was boring and forgettable with no climax. Before snobs begin with the "you only hate it because there isn't any blood and guts...blah blah blah.." I will stop u right there. I can appreciate a slow burner. I also appreciate when characters have a purpose? Who was Jacqueline- the teen who was taking pictures and intruding? It made no sense to me. Just a C movie through and through.
Dead Story
(2017)
Okay- But Muddled
10 August 2017
Warning: Spoilers
I am not sure if this really contains spoilers, but I don't want to risk it. Here we go... 1) There is SO much room for improvement, especially when it comes to special effects. This is the first tip off that this film is extremely low budget. 2) There are a lot of grey areas that are not cleared up. For instance, there is no history about the house besides her BFF's husband (or brother in law?)'s story about the house which was said to be fake by both her husband- who had checked the public records regarding the house- and by her BFF/sister. Who was the ghost? There was no explanation or comprehensive backstory. If all the events been in her head (which was not confirmed or clear either) then what was the story said by the radio announcer at the very beginning? Also, if it was in her head then it wouldn't have explained the ending either. 3) The crazy mom in law was just over the top IMO. 4) Again, there was not enough background and too many loose ends.
4.6 out of 10.
4.6 out of 10.
Dark Night
(2016)
This Evoked Almost NO Emotion
6 August 2017
If this wasn't based loosely on the real tragedy in Aurora, CO then it would just be a complete waste of time and film. They went above and beyond trying to be "artsy" and "ambiguous" and in doing so, they decided to substitute their version of "mystery" with any meaningful dialogue and sense of intrigue. You do not get to relate to ANY one of the characters at all because there is 0% character development. The one merit it had was that, if you stand the banality of the film and the "characters," you really do not know definitively who the shooter is (although I had a pretty good idea).
Horror Hotel: The Movie
(2016)
Should Be Labeled as Comedy
8 July 2017
I got this for 2 reasons- I LOVE horror anthologies and I love horror movies that take place in a crappy small motel. The premise was there and I suppose these people have a following that I was unaware of before getting this movie (hence the extra star- oh and I liked maybe one of the stories) but this movie is campy to the point of extreme. It should actually be called a comedy and not a horror movie as, although it is a horror-comedy, it leans much more towards the comedy genre and the acting is complete crap!
The Wake
(I) (2017)
Wow- I know What You Did Last Summer Gets a Reboot??
5 July 2017
Warning: Spoilers
Reminds me of I Know What You Did Last Summer- from the drunken driving, to Freddie Prinze Jr.'s lookalike as the lead to a low-rent Jennifer Love Hewitt (big nose and boobies included), to the blonde Sarah Michelle Gellar doppleganger w/ her the handsome yet drunken (& possibly violent!) BF- this seems a little familiar. The acting is so terrible that I don't know whether or not to laugh (is this a horror-comedy?) or to just shake my head. To be fair though, I had thought the role of the killer was transparent before I pressed play yet I kept guessing throughout the film. Don't walk into this movie w/ high expectations... OH and I also kept wondering- where the hell is the mom's other kid and why isn't she more worried about her only living child????? We never find out about that little blonde girl. Why did they even include that scene in there?
The Damned Thing
(II) (2014)
They Should Have Stuck w/ The Damned Thing as the Title...
8 March 2017
This movie is actually titled "Hotel Hell"- which doesn't make much sense. I am confused as to why it takes place at a hotel when none of the stories have anything to do with that hotel in which he hires a videographer to tour with him. I liked the twist at the end, but I am so confused as I really thought that when he was discussing the rooms that the 3 anthologies would actually be related to the hotel in some way shape or form...It was a solid campy B-movie horror flick, so please do not go into it assuming that it will have any deep meaning or be a work of art. I just enjoyed it for what it was and, if you decide to watch it, go into it with little to no expectations.
Evolution
(2015)
Confusing Film
10 December 2016
The film did have it's share of eerie moments and it does have a decent premise, but overall it was a disappointment. With the exception of the main character (a young boy), you do not feel much of an emotional connection with any of the other cast members. As other reviewers have mentioned, it has beautiful and artistic cinematography, but I usually chose to watch movies (especially if I am paying to rent them) for the plot and to be entertained. I am not opposed to directors and screenwriters using metaphors and having the audience use their own interpretations when it comes to the motives of the characters and outcomes of certain situations, but with this film it is just way too open-ended- at least for my taste. I felt it was slightly pretentious and tried so hard to be "deep" and artsy" that it kind of did itself (as well as its audience) a disservice. Maybe it would have worked better as a book?
Another
(2014)
Movie is Based off the Actress's Beauty and Not Substance or Plot
11 November 2016
Warning: Spoilers
The soft lighting, the slow moving "action" shots are there to make the actress appear ethereal. The director apparently thinks this is a full length music video as opposed to a horror film. The majority of the positive reviews I have read refer to how she is "so pretty" as opposed to her acting ability- which is godawful! Although she must have hit the casting couch, she isn't the only one with sub-par acting skills- the majority of the other cast members must have bribed the director for roles in this sad flick. There are many other horror films that were released in 2016 that are much better than this garbage. Do not even rent!
Slender
(I) (2016)
Huge Letdown
2 October 2016
Extreme let down of a film. I really liked the movie Always Watching (that was my first foray into the Slenderman character) and when I saw this pop up on iTunes New and Noteworthy section of horror movies I got giddy. The trailer looked good but I was not impressed. Whoever made the trailer should get all the income generated from viewers who download this thing. There are brief hints at Slenderman, but the movie is mostly low-budget filler (as earlier reported by other reviewers) and honestly, my favorite part was the beginning because the old dude at the bar was really funny. However, although I gave it an extra star for that, it is NOT why I watched/bought this movie! The filmmakers should go for a different genre because horror isn't their forte. The other 2 stars are for decent acting and a few mild moments which I was interested.
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