Change Your Image
sethdarvick
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Reviews
Clown (2014)
STOP Clowning around!
Hello, Eli? Mr. Roth? Why did you make this movie? It wasn't scary or even remotely unnerving. In the trues sense of the word, it was a flop--like the noise a clown's oversized shoe would make on asphalt. This clown should have perished in a circus fire like the one they had in Hartford, CT over 35 years ago. The premise of the movie: 100% predictable. Direction: Misguided. Lighting: There wasn't any. Sound: Loud then low, low then loud. Acting: Like a crappy comic book. If you enjoy wasting your time or if you are just curious and want to see if this film could be fodder for Mystery Science Theater 3000, then watch it. If you are expecting an Ed Wood masterpeice, you will be let down. If you couldn't tell, "I HATED THIS MOVIE!"
Puppet Show (2008)
You will hate this! Let me save you the trouble--do not rent!
Some guy thought he had a great idea for a movie and managed to get it made and distributed on just a few dollars. That is really the greatest aspect of this direct to DVD stinker--that it was made at all.
I read the only 2 reviews of this film before I rented it. Despite the gushing and overly praised hype about this movie (usually a sign that a shill or someone related to the movie wrote it). I went ahead and rented it despite the warning signs.
I had to resist shutting it of immediately. During the opening sequences I thought to myself, "Duped again!' The main character puppet was just so poorly made. It was basically a rubber hand puppet with a barely workable mouth. They had another puppet or re-used the same one and tried to make it look like a marionette for a few sequences. It didn't work. You would think that they would have had this problem worked out and tested before shooting, but I guess they thought no one would notice. Well, I noticed that and a couple of hundred other gaffes within the first 10 minutes and wondered why this film ever came to fruition,
The only emotion this mess would get from any audience would be extreme agitation.-- especially towards any puppet that remotely looked like Chowder head. Doesn't deserve a star and anyone who said it was good and gave it more than 1 star is full of sh1t. See fake review below.
Mountain Monsters (2013)
Bigfoot Graveyard> What!?
The hillbillies stumble across what is supposed to be a Bigfoot graveyard. Instead of bodies-- Trapper finds a plaster cast of a foot and a baggy filled with hair. Am I supposed to believe that a Bigfoot buried these items? What a bad idea! How do you explain that? They have all kinds of excuses for not catching the animal. Shaky camera work does not not show the audience anything at all! The show is fun and Wild Bill is always were a hoot.
The hillbillies stumble across what is supposed to be a Bigfoot graveyard. Instead of bodies-- Trapper finds a plaster cast of a foot and a baggy filled with hair. Am I supposed to believe that a Bigfoot buried these items? What a bad idea! How do you explain that? They have all kinds of excuses for not catching the animal. Shaky camera work does not not show the audience anything at all! The show is fun and Wild Bill is always were a hoot.