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stuckisean
Reviews
Piranha 3DD (2012)
So many actors, such little entertainment
So what can be said about the film that no one is talking about? You know what I am talking about! A remake you've seen Hollywood poop out several times... A monster comedy about Piranha fish eating up beach spring breakers. I could give you a movie summary and some spoilers but you wont care because I sure as hell didn't. I was so drunk that I honestly don't remember what I was looking at. Me and Rob bought the bud light platinum 12 pack and we had fun, unfortunately the fun stopped once the movie started.
It actually was not that bad. Haunting of the innocent holds onto that crown of dust. A bunch of somewhat famous actors accompanied the fish and double D's, "Christopher Lloyd, David David Hasselhoff, That chick that looked like Emma Watson, and the cowboy from Anchorman." But they couldn't all save Piranha DD. The laughs we're few, corny jokes, and when you see a horror at the store with Piranha fish on it you know you will have just as much fun watching it like dumping your money into a toilet and watching the money go down the tubes...
Mr. Christopher Floyd, you should have more respect for yourself and all the back to the future fans. After this one I could see Crispin Glover in his grace spinning around. 2 out of 10 stars. Much like Haunting of the innocent it was a dumb bore fest, without the platinum I would've been thrown into a boring rage.
V/H/S/2 (2013)
Not that bad
As you people know I am the b movie horror review guy and let me tell you something... I have to drink and drink a lot just like the angry video game nerd to get threw these movies and when I saw haunting of the innocent 2 weeks ago I just could not do it being seriously the worst film I've ever seen but let me tell you a little something. Rob had to go at 10 so we didn't have time to get the film in red box - It was a dude that watched all these weird VHS tapes that they found when running away from 2 people having sex.
They watched around 3 or 4 videos of different paranormal things they did. Being that not that much money was put into this film "Being Independent" shows that some directors can do that job and be the actor that you need to be. Doing the best you can as an actor in a movie that you need to do a good job in because who will hire you if you didn't do a good job.
This "VHS 2" May have been the best b horror film that I have seen running on the independent circuit. They did have those grey cut scenes that don't make sense like the surveillance camera stuff.
Out of the films I watch for you people I suffer and suffer endlessly on Friday. I clicked on this video on Netflix pretty much for the fact that I didn't want to accidentally buy another haunting of the innocence. I put on VHS 2 and I feel that this may have been the best one.
Haunting of the Innocent (2014)
worst movie i've ever seen
I have watched Voodoo Moon and have seen Killer Holiday but Haunting of the innocent takes the cake. For some reason it came out a day early on red box and had a theatrical release for God knows why, my friend asked Ruddigur if I would pay 10 dollars to see this and I would have walked out. A nonsensical bore fest of a suspense horror that looked more like a made for TV dark romance made for lifetime. I have never been so bored watching a movie, I was so mad at the end that I would seriously get in the cage with Chris Weidman and fight in the cage to get my 1.30$ back. I tolerated it by making up my own storyline about the Grandpa having an alter ego "The Dikler" and he ends up being the "a man who gets his way" and a serial one at that. I called Red box before to demand a refund after watching the movie horrible bosses which was a horrible movie but the level of crap makes me want to demand free rentals for a month. 0 out of 10 stars