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dsimcott
Reviews
Torch Song (1953)
Mean spirited movie
This movie left a bitter taste in my mouth and I'm not sure what the writer(s) were thinking or trying to achieve.
A mean spirited, sour faced musical star barks at every person around her for the duration of the entire movie, except when she's singing a handful of songs irrelevant to the paper thin plot.
Except for that one scene where she is crying in bed, there's not a single scene where she comes across as a likeable human being. Nasty, mean, horrible throughout. Her "romance" with the blind pianist makes no sense. He had a lovely sweet girl at home, but no, he wanted Maleficent instead.
Her behaviour has no consequences (unlike in Queen Bee) and there is no redemption either. We don't even learn what made her this way, her family home was nice at least?! No! I'd rather watch Trog ten times in a row than this again!
Fallout (2024)
Parody of Fallout?
I played the games, and this TV adaptation felt like a parody, with a vibe akin to Mars Attacks and Stepford Wives.
While the games do occasionally have humour that I would describe as cheeky or even dark, this TV adaptation is just plain silly, immature and goofy. Missing are also the sometimes scary aspects of the games, as well as large and lengthy action scenes with raiders, robots and mutated humans and animals. Each new building or location in the games is exciting and unpredictable, whereas here in the TV series the locations are repetitive, the scenes dull and goofy.
The acting, or direction of the actors, is mostly cartoonish but sometimes inconsistently serious/dramatic. The script is immature with sexual dialogue that feels out of place. The overall plot is paper thin; the behaviour of characters is unrealistic and illogical, and relationship development non-existent or unbelievable. There are no heroes to be found, nor a mission or characters to stand behind and root for. Yes, there is a "treasure" of sorts that everyone is after, but we don't find out what that is or does until the last episode, so the viewer doesn't know what they're supposed to be excited about. It seems as though the main focus for the writer was to come up with a plot twist for the last episode, and then, conscious of a low budget, construct plodding filler episodes between the first and last, and pad them out with irrelevant dialogue, while neglecting to build lovable characters with story arcs.
Considering how rich the world of the Fallout games is, the writer didn't seem to care to really go deep with anything, as everything feels superficial! The only real credit I can give is to the production team who went above and beyond to faithfully recreate and bring to life all the art and design of the games. It makes for a really fun "Easter egg hunt". It's a shame, because the TV series looks like Fallout, but it doesn't feel like Fallout!
American Horror Story: The Future Perfect (2021)
Psychopathic writing
Everyone died, no one redeemed themselves. Self-absorbed Mamie did practically nothing for 50 years in Area 51. Why couldn't the midwife, Theta, learn to love her human half and help Mamie kill the hybrid and escape?! Mamie wanted to buy humankind some time before the next perfect hybrid was found, and on her way out of Area 51, Theta could have given Mamie some "pills" or a compound that would evolve humankind with the potential to earn themselves a place on Earth alongside the alien races. (Of course we know that didn't work out in Red Tide) but at least Mamie and Theta would've redeemed themselves.
Prey (2021)
Meaningless
The cinematography is beautiful. But the script is awful. The words, the way these "friends" interact with each other, the girlfriend, lady in the cabin/shop, all of their lines and deliver is bizarre and unnatural. This is not how normal people talk. I therefore couldn't get emotionally involved with these people. On top of that, the ending is totally unsatisfying, making this a very meaningless experience.
Good Trouble (2019)
Woke Trouble
I absolutely loved "The Fosters" for portraying lesbians (gays and trans) in a sensitive and realistic way; for tackling (liberal) social and family issues without being unfair or unbalanced to alternative view points. We can only learn from each other through dialogue and/or meeting half way. I especially loved Stef and Lena's many conversations and arguments on parenting and relationship issues, seeing their bond and love for each other, made me want to be adopted by them.
On "Good Trouble" however, gone is the stellar writing, the heart warming and complex conversations and stellar performances. I would have loved to have followed Callie's and Mariana's careers and see them navigate real adult-world problems. We do get little bits of that, but the majority is spent watching their cringy sexcapades and lusting after everything that moves, as though they haven't matured at all. I personally didn't care for any of the new characters because they didn't feel particularly real or likeable. The other Adams-Foster kids turn up briefly from time to time to add next to nothing to the plot. It would have been nice for them to have offered help, guidance or a shoulder to cry on. The exception is episode 5 in season one, in which Stef and Lena show up and made me realise just how much I miss them!
As a liberal gay guy, I found the wokeness in this show overbearing, forced, and cringy. You won't win arguments or hearts with this show when you're literally telling viewers that they're evil and wrong for having a different opinion or voting for the wrong party. The founders of BLM literally participate in the making of this show and their ideology and influence is felt in every storyline. I don't enjoy propaganda, no matter where it comes from. I want the story and script of a TV show to get me to think, but not tell me how to think.
Lastly, I have a soft spot for Mariana, which could be due to the very charismatic actress who plays her. And I will miss finding out what happens to her character next, because I sadly can't stomach any more episodes.
Beneath (2013)
Fishy
The script is abysmal and the writers treat their characters with such venom it borders on psychopathic. Unrealistic dialogue and nonsensical decision making throughout. There's no point to this movie aside from showing off the rather excellent fish monster.
Dracula (1974)
Truly dreadful
This might be the worst Dracula movie I've seen. Jack Palance constantly looks like he's disgusted by something, pulling a mouth like "eurgh". There's no atmosphere, nothing dark, scary or creepy, because all the sets are over-lit. The direction is clunky and highly problematic, which makes the actors look like they're not sure where to stand or what they're supposed to be doing.
Friday the 13th (1980)
Animal cruelty
Mindless slasher, bad acting and script, and killing a real animal on screen should never be entertainment.
Mulan (2020)
Beautiful and spectacular.
I found this to be a visually stunning movie, beautifully shot and the dark subject matter of war and death was handled with a sensitivity so that the movie never became harsh or horrific, despite some awesome battle scenes. Many arrows find their target but due to the lack of blood and gore, it enters the realm of make believe which makes it suitable for older children. I'd you're looking for a carbon copy of the cartoon you'll be disappointed. Watch the cartoon. This is different, for a different audience.
AJ and the Queen (2020)
Lots of heart!
This beautiful comedy drama enchanted me. It's about an ageing drag queen "Ruby/Robert", whose personal life gets turned upside down. Despite everything going wrong and him getting lumbered with a neighbour's annoying bratty child (AJ), Robert soldiers on with determination and positivity, on a colourful road trip encountering countless obstacles. Ultimately the main theme here is "friendship".
Hellier (2019)
Nothing happens
Hours or pretentious talk with zero evidence for anything paranormal.
Scariest encounter: a tin can. No joke.
Bird Box (2018)
Unfortunate editing choices
The structure of the plot is so unfortunately built, that any mystery or suspense is destroyed pretty early on in the movie. Questions like "Who survives until the end", and "what is the "threat"" is either shown or embarrassingly explained within the first 19 minutes. Had it been edited chronologically, and some changes in the script, I'd have given it a higher score.