ivytheplant-1 Reviews

Omega Doom (1996)

What is the IMDb plot description talking about?

[6/10 · 10 July 2006]

Nah, I don't think it's a horrible movie. Sure it lacks a lot of action that movies of the period had, but I never thought of this as an action movie anyway. It seemed to me to be more like a comic book/graphic novel meets 70's samurai movie meets spaghetti western. Despite the obvious overarching situation (apocalypse, possibility of humans returning, obvious society gone to hell), it pretty much all but ignores that and focuses on the problem at hand: ridding the robot town of the "bad guys." It ends with a sense that Omega Doom has really done nothing more than put a band-aid on the whole situation, but his actions are more along the lines of self-preservation than anything else. He just showed up for a drink and gets sucked into a fight. That's how pretty much any of the same genre starts. Someone comes along, wanting to be left alone, but some dumb schmuck picks a fight and then our hero has to teach them a lesson. Nothing is resolved, the world is still as crummy as it ever was, but the hero gets to get back on the road in one piece. Lather, rinse, repeat.

That's why this kind of movie appeals to me. I don't think it's boring or a waste of time. It's interesting enough in it's hopeless nothingness. I don't always want to see a happily ever after ending or some Matrix-y, save-the-human-race type of fight. Those are a dime a dozen. That's what has always appealed to me in old samurai movies, though those tend to focus more on making things better. This movie was very reminiscent of Philip K. Dick stories: bleak futures with small stories that just are what they are.

Of course this kind of movie doesn't appeal to everyone, not by a long shot. I think my little brother fell asleep. Van Damme movies were more his thing. Lots of fight scenes and the bad guys get their due. Not that I don't like those movies, I do. It's just that something of the type of movie that Omega Doom is, is a breath of fresh air. There's a pointless despair to it that I enjoy. Something is done, and yet it isn't.

Also, I know the special effects are bad, but I honestly thought it was an 80's movie. I was surprised to see 1995-1997 as a release date. I think it's much better thinking of it as an 80's movie if you're the type of person who just can't get past special effects not being as good as LotR or Star Wars.

So this gets 6 stars from me. Not the greatest, but not the worst. Despite IMDb's plot description, it doesn't try to be anything other than it is, it fulfills my comic book/graphic novel pleasures, and I much enjoyed some of the talent in it compared to, say Van Damme.

Open Water (2003)

People are dense

[8/10 · 21 May 2006]

Some of the things I've seen written in reviews about this movie make my head hurt. It seems people didn't get some of the basic principles of ocean survival. That is what this movie was about. An accident leaves a couple stranded which ends tragically. "Oh, it's SO boring! I want my money back!" That's nice. I said the same thing about most movies I've seen in the past 10 years. Usually the ones filled with fluff. Like Armageddon.

So, okay, you don't like this movie. Whatever. But instead of listing really dense reasons for hating it, you might want to learn a few things before you list that as a reason. The ones that were the most annoying are listed below:

Q: Why didn't they swim to the boats? A: Because unless the boat is coming TOWARDS you, there's no way you're going to make it. It's going much, much faster than a human can swim, and at best, you'll only exhaust yourself trying to catch it. The best you can do is shout and signal for help. Even better would be to have flares and a signal mirror.

Q: Why didn't the try to swim for shore? A: In Branson, Missouri, there's a water park with a ride that's basically an irregular deep oval of water flowing in one direction. Swimming against it is incredibly exhausting for more than ten minutes. Now try to do that all day against a current ten times as strong and tell me just how far you'll get.

Q: Why did they just sit there in the water and not move? A: Yeah, in shark-filled waters, let's splash around as much as possible and imitate a shark's prey in distress. That's a BRILLIANT idea!

Q: Why didn't they make the head count mistake more "realistic?" A: But the screwed up head count ACTUALLY HAPPENED. Therefore, it is as realistic as it can get!

Q: Even though it's based on a true story, why didn't they make it more interesting? A: Honestly, it's nice seeing something "based on a true story" that isn't filled with 10 minutes of actual true story and 80 minutes of "what can we do to make this more interesting and damn the truth!"

Q: Why did they make up stuff they weren't sure of if it's a true story? A: Ironically, people say this and the question above in the same review. What do you want!? True or made up!? Even if the couple had survived to tell their story, there'd be enough gaps in the actual conversation that they'd have to fill it with something. You can't have it both ways. Unless something is documented word-for-word and action-for-action, it's not going to be 100% accurate.

Q: Why was their acting so terrible? A: Considering they were portraying a terrified couple in the middle of the ocean, surrounded by sharks, I think their acting was spot on. In real life, people don't act. They react. And from what I understand, the lead actress was terrified of sharks. A lot of her reactions were probably genuine. And as for their whining...has anyone ever been in a bad situation or been scared? No one knows how they'll act until they're in a terrifying situation. Bickering with each other is certainly a valid response, and is a response that has been documented. Assigning blame as fear starts to overtake and the gravity of the situation begins to sink in.

So, other than it doesn't suit your tastes, find another reason to hate it before you complain that it isn't "realistic" or "they should have swam faster."

I thought it was excellent and, even if not filled with car chases and explosions, was a satisfying movie experience. I hope there's more movies like this, lest it all become filled with half-naked exploding car chases.