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jackraven69
Reviews
Dark Heritage (1989)
New Low In Horror Is Great
First, seeing that this movie was a Lovecraft adaptation (somehow?) I picked up this priceless gem of horror-genre crap for about $2.50 at a flea market (though I think you can find people on Ebay who will pay you to take it). Upon sitting to watch this beauty, I noticed that there were three typographical errors on the back of the case. Planning to watch the worst piece of effluence to be made in a long time (Polish Vampire In Burbank not withstanding), I knew my wishes would be granted when the DVD title screen popped up: "Drak Heritage" I knew I had found a real winner. This movie went from bad to worse, and I actually believe they only gave the actors parts of the script at a time, so they never really knew how or where to develop their characters (as if the "story adapter" would have allowed characters to seem deeper than a blonde's brainwaves). The acting actually degenerated as the film progressed, or perhaps they shot it all in one day and the "actors" were getting tired. The actors they should have hired are the smooth-talkers who got this rancid pile of whale mucus produced and distributed, as they might have made more convincing characters, even if they were to simply spout gibberish (which might have made more sense plot-wise than the "carefully calculated dialogue" this film sports). But hey, they did great for a budget of $5.00, and seeing as I bought my copy for half that, they must've at least broken even somewhere, though the producers (a group of 12 year old rich boys with nothing better to do with daddy's money, who were undoubtedly promised a bit part in the credits) are probably kicking themselves very hard as far back as their knees will bend. All in all, dig around for $.50 in your couch, order it from some re-seller, and kick back to enjoy rotting your brain with something less entertaining than watching the grass grow. Great for insomniacs, because you will be snoozing in less than five minutes (which, oddly enough, is how long they took to edit this flick). On a scale of 1 - 10, I rate this a definite negative 9, as it reigns almost supreme among the refuse of the world (right below Neverending Story 3).