pornomouth Reviews

Assault of the Sasquatch (2009)

A Fun B-Movie

[8/10 · 6 February 2013]

What made me rent this movie was a tweet Joe Rogan made about how bad it was. No joke! And when I saw internet personality Shawn C. Phillips was in it, I had to see it! I had a lot of fun with this movie. Yes, it is a "bad" movie, but it is a fun bad movie. Th Sasquatch is hokey, the acting is bad and the story is a mess. But isn't that what we want from these kinds of flicks? Shawn C. Phillips fans, you will not be disappointed. He screams every and chews scenery like there was no tomorrow. His face goes beet red, veins popping out of his skull, Dennis Hopper in "Blue Velvet" times 10 type stuff. He really is a loon in this. I seriously thought the poor guy was going to have an aneurysm or a heart attack watching this. It was scary! Everyone else was "blah" but on the fun side of bad at least. Everyone knew they were making a fun b-movie, and a fun b-movie it is.

This is heads and tails above similar fare from the SyFy Channel and The Asylum. Where those movies opt for dry and bland, this delivers the goods with several really good kills, foul language and a sense of humor. a good job by all!! If you like these types of B-Movies, you will like this.

Hanna (2011)

Not a Very Good Thriller

[3/10 · 6 February 2013]

I went into this movie with high hopes, but unfortunately I was let down. The premise is interesting, with the young girl being raised as a Jason Bourne type super soldier and all, but its just so boring and pretentious.

I think the very bland presentation is what did it for me. This could have been a great movie with more heart, or gone the other way and been a great exploitation flick a la Battle Royale. But as it stands, just dullsville. I did not care about Hanna, her father, the dumb family she meets and certainly not Claire Danes doing her best Jodie Foster impersonation.

One scene is good however. as other reviewers have pointed out, the scene in the cargo yard is great. Very high suspense, great camera-work, and a great gimmick of the camera always tilting or panning to show you where Hanna is. And yes, in this scene you actually care a bit what happens to her, you root for her to get away from the bad guys...if the rest of the movie had been made with similar gusto, we really would have had something! But as it is, I cannot recommend this movie. A very bland missed opportunity.