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Terrifier 2 (2022)
Acting killed this one for me
I'm going to start by saying Art is an absolute icon. He's great, he's scary and every scene he's in is absolutely terrific.
This is a film that takes a solid 2 hours of your time. Be warned, not all of these two hours are worth your time.
The acting is dreadful. I'm going to give this some flack in a bit, but for the actors there's not a lot to work with. The script could have been so much better, but it wasn't. So make the most of it.
So onto the acting. The main character's mom. Give this lady a butter knife and let her act her way out of a cardboard box. It was near offensive. Scratch that, it was offensive, please never let her near a shoot again.
Next, the baby brother. YouTubers are not actors. Most kids do a better job at their high school musicals.
If these two characters were limited - fine, I'll take it. But they dominate about 3/4th of the film, just git!
I really likes the original, it was fresh, scary and sparse, with class acting. This is diarrhea.
A 4 star review just for the gore and the dude that played Art.
Also, when you want to introduce girl-Art, maybe elaborate on her story besides claiming she died in a circus accident?
This movie will defacate on your intellect.
Evil Dead Rise (2023)
A great Evil Dead movie
I liked the first Evil Dead because it had a nasty atmosphere. This one followed the recipe, and it was good gory fun throughout. The lead was a convincing possessed lady, and her face was perfect for it.
There were some slow bits, true, but nothing too blatant. Especially when it comes to the kids, at the end of it everybody mostly cares about Kassie only.
As an origin story, there could have been a bit more explanation on the phenomenon. It's hard though, because you don't want to fully pull off the shroud of mystery. But a location or a bit of an explanation why would have been great.
Go see this though, it's got the right vibe, it's got a lot of gore and a lot of winks to the past installments. Would normally rate this a 7, but I'm in a good mood and I think the score's too low.
Jurassic World Dominion (2022)
Way to make a dino movie about locusts
I don't know what happened here. The last two installments, which were not flawless, were all in good fun. They had a lot of dinos, a plot, and a charming cast.
This strayed from the path. Trying to please the fans, they brought back a lot of JP cast. Terrible move, because most of them couldn't act their way out of a cardboard box.
The plot was mostly about some locust plague, and I could not care less. This was however the first 4DX movie I saw in the theater and if you have to go see this film, see it like that. It's the future of cinema if you don't have a back problem.
Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore (2022)
Gave it a 4 just for the Dan Fogler substory
Only thing I liked, the rest of it was an absolute clownshow. It's got Redmayne looking difficult, some deer looking creatures and nowhere to go. Skip it.
Also, not to be an a-hole, but I like how they booted Depp because of controversy, but Ezra Miller's perfectly fine. Draw the line.
Turning Point: 9/11 and the War on Terror (2021)
Decent documentary
Cool overview of the prelude and consequences of 9/11. I like how there's a lot of republican cronies on here trying to justify the war against Iraq. Good luck with that, the documentary is worth a watch though.
Till Death (2021)
Good fun, nothing deep
I enjoyed the performances by all of the cast, but I think Hollywood should say its goodbyes to Megan Fox. Nothing she did in this film seemed remotely like she wanted to be there.
That said, just a fun thriller thriving on a core idea of post-mortem vengeance. It had some cool shots in the snow, and it was a good directorial debut, a proper first full length. Don't expect The Shining, expect some fun parts, but nothing too unforgettable.
Run (2020)
Impressive
This is a sad, sad movie about current affairs in overmedicating. A mother is afraid to let go of her child and medicates her onto the point of disability. Though there's hardly a star cast, both actresses give their absolute best and you can tell. Cool film, nice thrills, definitely worth a watch.
The Unholy (2021)
What did I watch?
The premise of the movie wasn't even that bad, but there are so many flaws that turn this into a bad movie. None of the actors are into it, you can clearly tell. Lacklustre direction really shoves this film off a cliff. Can't recall Jeffrey Dean Morgan ever making such a terrible film, but there's a first for everything I guess. Just a silly, hastily made film that shouldn't get anyone's attention.
The King of Staten Island (2020)
Decent film, not spectacular
I'll start off by saying I'm not American so barely have any sentiment with 9/11, except for that it was tragic and a lot of lives were lost that should not have been lost. Pete carried the film and he did a decent job at it, like just decent. The plot tropes were good and it made for an enjoyable film. What I miss however, are the typical Apatow jokes, there's no potshots or fun stuff happening here, it's Funny People 2.0 - a lot of heart, but no brains or brawl. Would recommend it, but rather as a drama than a comedy film.
Great White (2021)
Good popcorn fun, don't expect any realism here
Five people on a rescue mission in shark infested waters, what could go wrong? Listen, don't expect awesome CGI here, the plot is half baked and I couldn't give two squirts of squirrel pee less about the characters, but the film packs some nice thrills and overall, I was entertained. This isn't trying to be a great movie, but just one for the shark horror fans - and let's face it guys, we've had just 1 fantastic sharkfilm. Ever. Until the next one comes, if it ever does, movies like these are enough to still the hunger.
Paradise PD (2018)
This is sad
Just terrible potty humour, a 12-year old might laugh at this. It's just as as bad as their last show with the scout camp. When something's crude and funny, hell yes, but this is just crude and so incredibly dumb.
The First Purge (2018)
Just turn your brain off
Though it's a huge step down from all the previous Purge films, some scenes were rather enjoyable. I enjoyed a lot of the Skeletor-scenes, he was a convincing angry maniac and practically the only "real" purger in the movie, besides perhaps the masked old ladies and some of the random encounters on the street.
I think the two mains did a good job with the script they were given, which frankly was shoddy at best. I think Y'lan Noel is one actor we'll be hearing more of.
As a bird's eye perspective on today's political climate, this film didn't function too well. There were some cheap shots at feigned politics and they made it look too easy to get away with murder, literally. Some jokes were just bland.
The biggest problem I had was with the end. A drug dealer doing a 180, first killing his competition to end up saving pretty much his entire neighborhood, and being received as a modern day Escobar over a 12-hour timespan? Nah. "What do we do now?" "We fight," said the drugdealer, like a watered down Robin Hood. Not buying it.
The best plan of action is to just shut off your brain and enjoy this film and the real purgers doing their thing and not worry about the deeper message it's trying so hard to convey.