ApostleOfDirt Reviews

Moonlight (I) (2016)

Bring it on !

[10/10 · 5 March 2017]

WTF are all you haters on these days? Go review some super hero movie. I bet that kind of boring suits you well. Movies are the seventh art form are they not ? Art is created by an artist who discovers something admirable and then finds a way to present it to the world so that other people could admire too. Well this artist did just that, he presented some one's real life struggles in way that is easy to understand and empatize. It's is a shame people don't see it. Sometimes we can't see the emperor because we are blind. Most of the movies today are plain commercials in disguise with a team of marketing experts behind them shutting our eyes to true beauty and feeding our primitive desires hence all the more rampant consumerism.

Arrival (II) (2016)

Yet another brain dead pseudo-SF Hollywood crap of a movie.

[1/10 · 3 December 2016]

I'm convinced the majority of positive reviews are bought and payed for by the makers of this :) "masterpiece".

SPOILER ALERT, but only in an abstract sense.

Thanks IMDb, I hope you get a good slice of the pie for allowing this. Now to the movie itself. Denis Villeneuve made his worst movie to the date, and I'm sure he knows that. But hey, maybe he just realized he needs a pension fond. Can't blame a guy for looking out for his financial future. True art can wait. This movie borrows heavily from yet another brain dead pseudo-SF"masterpiece", Interstellar. Heavy narration throughout the movie and time back/forward-flashes of a main character's family moments, and practically steals the aliens from The Mist (Steven King novel), hope Steven got his share of the pie as well. The movie's resolution is so dumb I just have to congratulate the scriptwriters on their breakthrough in the realm of yet unexplored stupidity. Just imagine a language that after you learn to write it lets you see your entire future.

Wild Tales (2014)

Finally, something worth watching !!!

[10/10 · 23 July 2015]

Amazing, a movie with almost all of it's minutes perfectly aligned to comprise a movie watching experience after which you won't ask for your time back, rather you'll feel it has been a time well spent. Time will fly and eyes will grow, jaw will drop, and tears will flow. This movie has achieved for me something only a true Greek drama can. It has borough catharsis back to the cinema, but in a really funny and a really clever way, and with the benefit of repeating it 6 times over. Why is there no more movies like this ??? I presume, because it's such a f... hard thing to do. Watch this movie. You will regret it only if it's your 13'th time. Maybe not even then :)

You Carry Me (2015)

Unconnected at every level. Avoid ! Avoid ! For the love of Art Avoid !

[1/10 · 18 July 2015]

What is this ? How can you invest 6 years of production time into something and it comes out looking like this mess. So, so underdeveloped. First things first. The acting: Lead actor is not an actor, he can not act, it's too obvious. Don't blame him, he is trying and someday he may learn. The girl, his daughter, although somewhat better, not convincing at all. Nataša Janjić brilliant execution, BRILLIANT. The script: Lacks imagination. Redundant and boring mesh of repeated clichés we all heard before plenty of times. Camera: I'm not an expert, but what the heck with all the blur on big open shots, was that on purpose or what ?.

The biggest issue with this movie is that is hyped with no good reason. It's not even average, it's bad. it' way too long. You could hear the audience in the cinema whispering to each other at end of the first hour wishing it would end soon!. It's 2 and a half hours of the worst movie agony you as a movie goer will ever endure. You keep waiting for something to happen but nothing does. I could go through every single scene in this movie and write only about what is wrong with it.

Some characters are really likable and this could have been a good movie , if not for the directors obvious ego tripping on expressionistic overdose. One of the main focuses of this movie is old people's dementia, but it's like the movie itself is demented and it knows there is no cure so it doesn't care that much just like the director.

A Pigeon Sat on a Branch Reflecting on Existence (2014)

We should start seriously considering punishing the movie industry for such offerings ...

[1/10 · 18 July 2015]

To quote a fellow reviewer that pretty much nailed it: "This movie is the film equivalent of hanging an Ikea painting in an art gallery and tell people it's an expensive masterpiece." I don't know what the creator of this movie wanted to achieve. Maybe he was on some kind of mind twist combo of antidepressant drugs, that made him believe the depressing nothingness is the new funny. To call this movie a dark comedy would be like calling a EST a great roller coaster ride. It's not comedy. It's not dark. It is time wasting, random pile of boring scenes. Nothing to learn, just the feeling of what am I doing here, why would anyone in their right mind wanna watch this. If nothing else this movie could be a nice testament to how a movie can be bloated to have artistic value when it's actually quite the opposite. I say to the the emperor is naked and fat. >Go watch this movie only if you need money badly and someone offers money to you if you watch this movie.

Deadwood (2004–2006)

Doubt there'll ever be a gem like this !

[9/10 · 5 April 2015]

Impressive, great character development, highly immersive interplay. It will transport you back though time to meet the real old west. You will be able to smell the manure in the air and be delighted at the same time. This show could be a benchmark for quality air time. Never the less, the show's production does suffer from one disease, the most common one. It accustoms you to a high level of excitement and awe during the first season and then suddenly drops to a pointless lingering about, in other words it seems to be getting stretched needlessly filling the space with empty dialog that serves only to prolong the show, only to commercialize on it. If compressed to about 20 episodes or so it would be a full time mind cocsucking blower.

Crno-bijeli svijet (2015–2021)

What a waste of time !

[1/10 · 13 March 2015]

After watching a couple of episodes I got tired of it's unconvincing, dry, amateurish, humorless (not by purpose), thing they wanna call acting. The only way you could enjoy this is if you have already been brainwashed to this level of quality. The script is exciting and imaginative as a tic-tac-toe match played by a couple of drunken monkeys, no offense to those beautiful creatures. And they show it on prime time and advertise as one of the most expected shows of the year. Unbelievable. Can they produce a show worthy of paying attention ? Has Croatia no true movie industry talents ? I do think it does and that this show is just a fine example of Crony Capitalism at work.