internetuser1655 Reviews

Bad Moms (2016)

A failure with some nasty hateful parts

[3/10 · 29 July 2016]

This is another example of how a good comedy is far more difficult to make than a good drama or action flick.

I was dragged along to this movie by a friend hoping that it would not be as bad as the trailers and TV spots suggested. It is. I really wanted this movie to surprise me, to make me laugh to make me care for the characters and have some investment in the story, but it failed to achieve any of that. What I saw was a two hour mess of a movie. An unfunny, poorly written, poorly edited, contrived cash-in on the beloved Hangover franchise. It has some of the poorest dialogue and worst performances I've seen in a while. I honestly can't think of any redeeming qualities that this film has.

The ugly gag about uncircumcised men is particularly nasty and reveals a mean spirit considering that circumcision rates are declining in the USA and currently at only about 60%. So that's almost half the domestic population that has been insulted by the dirtbags responsible for this disaster. What pathology is behind this scene one can only guess at.

Into the Badlands (2015–2019)

One of the very worst of 2015

[3/10 · 24 November 2015]

This one is truly bad.

At first blush the bright color palette catches your eye and you want to hope for the best. Then the reality starts to set in by the second episode.

Nothing in this world makes any sense. You have an Asian Ninja in some bizarre pre-Civil War plantation/feudal world where slaves pick cotton all day outside the castle walls. But some of the characters do have cool motorcycles and old cars!

Then there's the amateurish writing. The dialogue is stilted and awkward.The end result is a story that just falls flat making it tough to stay focused.

But perhaps worst of all is the acting. What kind of bizarre accent is Martin Csokas attempting there and failing at miserably? I have no idea. The red head baroness is another egregious example of miscasting. The young teen actor is one of the worst I have seen in years.

Then finally there's today's mandatory pandering to female audiences with fight scenes wherein a lone female kills 30 men inside of a minute. After two of these inane fight scenes in the second episode, I decided not to waste anymore of my time in this garbage.

Sad to say, this series does not have a single redeeming quality.

Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp (2015)

Truly Awful

[3/10 · 1 August 2015]

Some shows are so bad that you feel embarrassment for everyone in the cast and crew.

This is one of them. What a let down after all the hype and the big name cast. The jokes fall flat and the young actors are all pretty mediocre. I managed to endure five episodes before deciding it was a waste of my life. Each 25 minute episode felt like two hours.

The only funny moment is when a 41 year old Elizabeth Banks tells her editor "I know I'm 24, but I can still pass for 16 and infiltrate that camp!"

Other than that this is a huge bomb.

What talented actors and actresses such as Paul Rudd and the completely edible Elizabeth Banks are doing in this disaster is a mystery.

Marco Polo (2014–2016)

A Big Letdown

[3/10 · 15 December 2014]

Mild spoiler ahead.

I really wanted this series to be a winner because I like Netflix. Any company capable of creating a masterpiece such as House of Cards deserves our utmost support.

Sadly, Marco Polo is a dud. Let's begin with the good stuff. The production values are amazing and the scenery is breathtaking. It's right up there with Game of Thrones.

As far as the story line is concerned, it can be rather hard to follow at times. Part of the problem is that many of the female actors are hard to distinguish. In the 5th or 6th episode we see two look-alike women talking in a room. Suddenly one commits hari-kari and the other instantly dons her clothes. Who was who? No one could figure it out. Fortunately the males are easy to tell apart.

As for the acting, well beyond the Kublai Khan, Hundred Eyes, and the evil chancellor, it's mostly a letdown. The lead actor makes his character far more wimp than hero. I must say that Joan Chen looks as beautiful as she was in The Last Emperor. Some people age well.

Here's the most annoying bit about the series. It includes the now mandatory tough girl warrior to appease the Tumblr feminists. These characters are always implausible but Marco Polo's is especially so. The Mongol princess has arms and legs as thin as chopsticks yet beats males twice her size. Give me a break. However, the producers didn't stop there. No sir, they added a concubine who regularly defeats squads of men while buck naked.

This kind of nonsense makes me want to turn the show off and go watch Cowboys and Aliens.

Bad Judge (2014–2015)

One of the very worst shows in TV history

[1/10 · 9 October 2014]

If this series was about a male judge who behaved in the exact same crass manner as the lead does, it would be attacked and chased off the air for promoting offensive and vulgar behavior. However, since there's a twist here (hint: it's a female Animal House type lead) some think it's the cat's pajamas.

What has the world come to? If watching a painfully unfunny disaster of a comedy that appears to have been written by 18 year old frat boys hell bent on making the lead as unpleasant, vulgar, and offensive as possible is your idea of entertainment, then by all means watch this utter rubbish.

Everyone responsible for bringing this garbage to the airwaves should be ashamed of themselves.

Candidly Nicole (2014–2015)

What is wrong with people?

[1/10 · 20 July 2014]

Unbelievable!

If you thought that the Kardashians having their own show was a depressing commentary on modern society, you are in for a shock, friends. It's just gotten a whole lot worse with this horrible Ritchie woman getting her own show.

Who on earth is the genius that decides who gets their own show and who doesn't?

Moreover, how on earth do they justify giving this sorry excuse for a human being airtime?

I cannot imagine a worse person based on her egregious record on various human rights issues being awarded a media platform from which to spew more bile.

Halt and Catch Fire (2014–2017)

Trite, banal, and insipid

[3/10 · 2 June 2014]

Okay, it's supposed to be set in the bad old sexist 1980s but within minutes of the pilot episode's start, we are introduced to this ultra-cool yet somewhat butchy girl computer genius who you just know will put all the male engineers to shame. Not only that but she is a rebel who is just too cool for school.

On the political correctness scale of 10, this character rates a 12.

Then there's Lee Pace's character who for no discernible reason decides to ignore a class room full of engineers in order to chase the girl. Is she really the best and brightest of the lot or does he simply want to get in her pants? Frankly, I don't care what the answer is because both are dull cardboard cut-out figures who lack even a shred of authenticity.

And Lee, what's with wearing your tie tucked into your trousers? Are you channeling Forrest Gump?

I'd love to know who the people are giving this mediocrity a 10 star rating. It's most likely AMC employees connected with the show.

Faking It (2014–2016)

Breathtakingly Stupid and Offensive

[2/10 · 7 May 2014]

I cannot believe some of the garbage that now appears on television.

Under the Dome was pretty bad as well. So is House of Lies.

But this little doozy may just win the "It's So Politically Correct That It will Make Your Eyes Bleed Award."

I have no problem with the sexual orientation of these kids. The good lord made them that way. So it's not my problem.

What I do I have a problem with is the idiotic message that being lesbians somehow automatically makes the duo heroes who the heterosexuals will idolize and fawn over.

Who came up with this concept? It's so far removed from reality that it might as well be classified as science fiction.

The Americans (2013–2018)

Pretty Good But With Some Silly Bits

[3/10 · 25 March 2014]

The series is better than I expected it to be. I initially kept putting off giving it a try because there was something about it that made me suspect it would be another Homeland which I detest for the cheap plot gimmicks used to keep the audience in suspense.

However, as it turned out the show is pretty good. The lead actors Matthew Rhys and Noah Emmerich are what make it strong. Rhys even looks sort of Russian and his struggle to remain a loyal communist in the face of daily evidence that America is a freer and far more prosperous model is particularly compelling. How long will it be before he finally admits that he's on the wrong side of history?

I will also add that the kids are not annoying as most TV kids are. The young actress playing the daughter is especially gifted and I actually enjoy the episodes that follow her around.

The only weak point in the entire series is the character played by Keri "Felicity" Russell. Her silly fight scenes are totally implausible. Week after week we see tiny fragile 5'4" 105 pound Keri beating up athletic 6' men trained in martial arts. Frankly, these scenes are plain stupid. What purpose do they serve? Is it a gimmick to appeal to feminists?

Masters of Sex (2013–2016)

Boring Lifetime-style Soap Opera

[3/10 · 22 February 2014]

I am compelled to add Masters of Sex to the list of shows with unsavory characters. (House of Lies is another.) I lasted through 8 episodes of this turd. The only reason I endured so long is because the series launched in the television dead zone when there is nothing to watch.

The central character is a pervy and repressed little man who can't sexually satisfy his own wife and tries to place the blame for their inability to have a child on her instead of admitting that he's shooting blanks, which he well knows is the real problem. Once the audience realizes just how dishonest he is it's game over in terms of ever having any sympathy for him. (His wife is about the only decent human being in the entire series.) Underlying all of his problems is the insatiable sexual curiosity of a 14 year old boy which he attempts to disguise as something scientifically motivated. Yeah right buddy-boy, no one is buying into that.

Basically all the men are portrayed as self-absorbed lechers who spend their days either cheating on their spouses, chasing teen candy-strippers, or both which gives the series a Lifetime sort of vibe.

Men bad; Women good!

Indeed the only male you can feel any sympathy towards is Beau Bridges' character who has to keep his true sexual orientation closeted in the suffocating 1950s.

Then there's the female lead. Oh what an inspirational feminist heroine we have here! She's a 30-year-old floozy with a long history of consistently making the wrong choices. All she has to show for herself is three failed marriages, two dysfunctional pre-teens, and a high school diploma. Like Masters, she's all about sex too. Nothing else really matters to her. Despite all her protests to the contrary about wanting to be a good mommy, actions do speak louder than words. As a result her son hates her but she puts the blame for this on him. You see, he's only acting up because he is too immature to understand just how hard mommy dearest works. She leaves the kids first thing in the morning to work at the hospital all day and then stays till midnight to watch others having sex and eventually starts having sex with her weirdo boss. It never enters Princess Not-So-Bright's brain that being away from home 18 hours a day is screwing up her kids.

Whatever happened to the notion of having characters with at least a few redeeming qualities and the occasionally uplifting story line in a series?

House of Lies (2012–2016)

The Ugly Side of Humanity

[3/10 · 14 February 2014]

My nomination goes to House of Lies for the ugliest cast of characters ever assembled for a television series. Normally I like Don Cheadle but he's totally miscast here as some sort of stud who no woman can resist. On top of that he plays a ruthless scumbag who will lie, cheat, and manipulate everyone around him in order to advance his career. We are too used to him playing good decent people to buy into this Kaan character.

Then there are all the other annoying scumbags that populate it. For example, his two male assistants are guys you just want to beat the crap out of after a few minutes. This goes double for Ben Schwartz as Clyde. Was he created by antisemites? Kaan's female assistant played by Bell is not much better. Then there is Kaan's ex-wife who looks and acts a lot more like a cheap prostitute than a professional woman. Why on earth would they cast a woman half a foot taller to play Cheadle's ex wife? Her head is also twice the size of Cheadle's.

I won't even get into Kaan's screwed up family. Uggh. That kid needs help. Who on earth takes their cross-dressing son to a client's office when the boy is wearing a dress? The kid needs to be in therapy before he's assaulted on the streets or worse. On top of all that actor playing the son is terrible at it.

The show is just a sad depressing statement on humanity.

Somehow I managed to get through the entire first season before finally accepting that it's a horrid waste of time. I did so because I kept hoping there might be some business insights like the book has. Nope. The show is just a train wreck about a group of mostly unattractive, morally bankrupt and psychologically screwed-up people.