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Reviews
Ripley (2024)
OMD, what did I just watch?!
Oh. My. Dog.
It's been weeks since I finished Ripley and it not only has stayed with me, it has completely ruined television because everything I've watched after it has been crap by comparison.
I already knew the story, but it didn't matter. The sets and settings were works of art and the cinematography was so good, you could probably randomly pause the show at any point, screenshot it, print and frame it, and it would look perfectly fine above your sofa in your living room. The casting was completely on point - everybody owned their role. The pacing was perfect. Costumes and props ... incredible.
Anyone who rates this ... I can't just call it a TV show ... this fine piece of cinema less than an eight is developmentally challenged. I myself am tempted to give it a ten, but Aristotle has taught me that there is no such thing as a perfect triangle. Ripley though must come very close.
La belle verte (1996)
Believe me, 5 stars is generous.
On another planet, French aliens who shower rarely if ever, just like the French on Earth, have mastered telepathy and interstellar travel. They send an emissary back to earth to "check up on it and report back" Nobody wants to go as earth is so backwards. But one alien women (who is also the director of the film), who has recently and secretly discovered that she's half-earthling, volunteers to go.
So far so good. She arrives on earth and ha ha ha, we still use cars! And ha ha ha, the cafe is filled with cigarette smoke! And ha ha ha, we still use money!
From that point on, they re-use that shtick over and over and over until her sons come to earth to check on her and they meet two earth girls and fall in love and then the sons take those girls back to their perfect planet to eat vegan and sleep in grass nests by the lake. The end.
Evidently, judging by the 10/10 ratings this thing is getting, people like any story, as long as it's a moving picture and has got a pretty face like Philippine Leroy-Beaulieu's to look at.*
Cats (2019)
Another case of automated bots skewing the reviews.
All these other reviews can only be a concerted effort by some bad actor to trash this movie which, while not Oscar-worthy, is actually pretty good. If anything, it needed more Corden though, not less. See if you can spot the uncredited cameos by Robert Downey Junior and Vin Diesel.
LOL, no I'm just kidding. This was unspeakably horrible.