Benjo221 Reviews

The 7D (2014–2016)

Hilarious Update on a Disney Classic

[8/10 · 26 October 2014]

This show is a really funny take on the seven dwarfs that's updated for modern audiences. There are a lot of good jokes for parents that will go over the kiddos' heads. All the humor is clean however, so you don't need to worry any if the material with your kids. They'll have a blast too.

As a Disney fan, I also enjoyed all of the in jokes throughout the show in regard to the old movies and theme parks. The kingdom of Jollywood is a great send up on Fantasyland within the Magic Kingdom and Disneyland, complete with a Skyway ride and cheesy songs to cheer up the villagers.

Dragonstrike (1993)

...and the evil you will SMITE???!!!!

[1/10 · 20 December 2002]

Simply embarrassing. This "film," which is an introduction into the role-playing board game of the same name, has been a source of amusement for my old high school buddies and me for years. One of us owned the game, although we never played it, but stumbled across this dreck some years back. It is so awful, so ridiculous, that it just happens to be one of the funniest 30 minutes of your life. While trying to lay out the rules and regulations of said game, Dragonstrike gives you a cheesy story-line played out by cheesier actors in front of the cheesiest excuse for blue screen this side of the helicopter crash sequence in Sudden Death. However, Dragonstrike might just be so bad, that it's good. Some notable things to look for during you're "quest":

1. Deron McBee - Perhaps best known for his days on American Gladiators as Malibu, McBee turns in another muscle-head performance here as the Warrior. The running joke between my friends is that we believe they actually blue-screened McBee's teeth in order to make them as white as they appear in the film.

2. John Boyle (I) as the Dragonmaster - Some one should have fired this guy a long time ago. Hardly believable and hilariously laughable, the Dragonmaster is the Narrator of the whole ordeal. Watch for his "floating head," actually Boyle in a black turtle-neck against a black back-drop. Try not to laugh as he asks you to "kindly cast a 'pause' spell on your VCR."

3. "Smite" - Boyle gives us the crown jewel of Dragonstrike which, I am sure, once noticed will have you rolling. Toward the end of the film, the Dragonmaster goes into an embarrassing monologue about your adventures, during which he states, "...and the evil you will smite!" Look closely on the word "smite," and you will notice that it has been horribly dubbed over from the past tense of the word, "smote," that the Dragonmaster must have gotten wrong during shooting. Apparently the budget for Dragonstrike wasn't big enough for another take in this scene.

Gunan, King of the Barbarians (1982)

Priceless Junk

[1/10 · 20 December 2002]

While at the video store a while back, my friend and I stumbled across this gem. And man, is it terrible. This is probably the worst movie I've ever seen, but it's so darn funny.

As you can see from the other user comments posted, this movie is chock full of awful stuff. Obviously, the English dub is horrible, but it's to be expected from a film of this ilk. Even worse are the endless voice-overs at the beginning and ending of the movie. The action scene's are some of the funniest you'll ever see, given that they're all done entirely in slow motion (Watch for the crushing "death blow" Gunan gives at one point where he simply slaps his foe across the back with his sword).

My friend and I believe that the film had to have been directed by two different people, given the drastically different first and second halves of the movie. In the first half, we see the competition between Gunan and his brother to see who is the most "invincible" of the barbarians. Suddenly, the movie turns into Lenne running around topless for the rest of the film, with some strange subplot about a tribe of female warriors which turns into the main battle scene and climax and whatever other garbage the "second" director wanted to toss in. You be the judge.