raphael0033 Reviews

Basket Case 3 (1991)

Mongoloid he was a mongoloid (contains farts)

[1/10 · 20 August 2011]

(Spoiler= this movie is a FART).

Very big spoiler = there's action between 1'08 and 1'12. And some comedy too (between 1'13 and 1'14). But don't worry, there is nothing going on besides those six minutes of action, because this movie is total crap. I would like to thank Duane, the brother of the 10 minutes freaks, especially for his role which reminds me of E.T.

In this "movie" you can see a lot of freaks. They dance, they drink Vodka, they eat pancakes and they like baby-sitting... That's all.

Was that a direct-to-video? Unfortunately, no. But it could have been a direct-to-your-toilets.

Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982)

0/10

[1/10 · 31 October 2009]

Well,

1 is for the movie because i can't put a 0. 1 is for the acting because i can't give a 0. 1 is for the music because it's worse than Tokio Hotel.

The plot ? A mustache ninja is in a conspiracy from planet nowhere with masked robots and... that's it. You understood ? So did I.

This movie is a complete fart. The morale of this story is that big firms that produce Halloween masks are evil because they kill local stores where you usually buy your Halloween masks. Thanks a lot again for this brand new idea.

Thanks for not watching it.

Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007)

For day-blinds only

[1/10 · 20 August 2009]

Well,

There are lots of useless scenes in this huge pile of crap. Stupid characters acting in a pointless plot. Nonsense, e.g.: night, day, then night again, aliens, then predator in less than a minute. Worse framed than the Blairwitch Project. Probably the missing scene of the movie : the Predator with hanging glanders wanting to return home.

The whole movie is even not funny, just boring. You have a lot of "deja-vu" scenes with aliens snorting humans before killing them, a predator (probably named George Clooney) practicing self surgery...

I swear the movie is like that.