Bill Scott: Bullwinkle J. Moose, Fearless Leader, Grumpira, Dudley Do-Right, Additional Voices

Quotes 

• Narrator : In the meantime, Boris and Natasha had been given one last chance to get the fabulous bowler back.

  Fearless Leader : You see this box, Badenov?

  Boris Badenov : Yes, Fearless Leader.

  Fearless Leader : At noon I send it to Pottsylvania with Kirward Derby inside.

  Boris Badenov : Suppose I don't get derby?

  Fearless Leader : I send it back with *you* inside!

  Boris Badenov : But I wouldn't be able to breathe in there.

  Fearless Leader : Believe me, that would be the least of your problems.

  Boris Badenov : You mean...?

  Fearless Leader : Jawohl! You won't *be* breathing.

  Boris Badenov : Hoo boy...

• [Rocky and Bullwinkle are deciding what to do with the Kirward Derby] 

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Bullwinkle, there's only one place that hat should *be*.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : On a hat rack!

  Rocket J. Squirrel : We gotta take it to Washington!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : He never wears a derby.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : No, I mean...

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Usually he wears a wig.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Bullwinkle!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Besides, he's not with us anymore, you know.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Bullwinkle!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : He's gone to the big cherry orchard in the sky.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : I don't mean *George* Washington! I mean Washington, D.C.!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Oh, *him*!

• Rocket J. Squirrel : Now, how do we get to Washington from here? We're broke.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Beats me.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Put on the hat and see if you can get an idea.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Okay, let's see.

  [Bullwinkle puts on the Kirward Derby] 

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Well! Obviously the best way to get to Washington is run for office and be elected!

• Rocket J. Squirrel : Go on, Bullwinkle.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Go on, where?

  Rocket J. Squirrel : When do we get there?

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Why ask *me*?

  Rocket J. Squirrel : 'Cause you're wearing the Kirward Derby on your head, and...

  [Rocky notices that Bullwinkle is no longer wearing the Kirward Derby] 

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Hokey smoke! It's gone!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : My head?

  Rocket J. Squirrel : The hat!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Ooh, I'm glad it wasn't my head. I wouldn'ta had nothing to hang my antlers on.

• [from the "Fractured Fairy Tales" segment, "John's Ogre Wife"] 

  Grumpira : [concocting a witches' brew]  A pinch of this, and a pinch of that, a Dewey button, and a French-fried bat.

• [from the "Dudley Do-Right" segment, "Niagara Falls"] 

  [Snidely Whiplash has traveled to Alaska with Dudley Do-Right in tow, hoping to find a stretch of railroad track on which to leave Dudley, ahead of an oncoming train] 

  Snidely Whiplash : Well, Do-Right, according to my calculations, the 12:02 from Quebec will be pulling into Nome any second. Come, we must find a deserted stretch of track.

  Dudley Do-Right : How about this, Snidely? This looks good.

  Snidely Whiplash : You make the choice. After all, you're going to be tied to it.

  Dudley Do-Right : Oh, this will do fine, then.

  [Snidely drops Dudley onto the tracks] 

  Snidely Whiplash : You know something? I could like you, if it weren't for your sense of justice and fair play. Why don't you rotten up like me?

  Dudley Do-Right : Oh, I could *never* do that.

  [a train whistle blows in the distance] 

  Dudley Do-Right : Hark! Better stand back or I'll miss my train.

  Dudley Do-Right Narrator : This was it, then. This was our valiant hero's swan song. His future would all be past. Nevermore would his innate goodness roam the Canadian wilds. Nevermore.

  Snidely Whiplash : Egad, methinks I feel a twinge of pity.

  Dudley Do-Right : Goodbye, Mr. Whiplash.

  Snidely Whiplash : Some foreign feeling beats within me hardened breast. Do I feel the pangs of guilt?

  Dudley Do-Right : Tell Mumsy how I went.

  Snidely Whiplash : I can't do it! I can't, I can't, I can't...

  Dudley Do-Right Narrator : And with that, Whiplash pulled the switch and the speeding train swerved onto another track.

  Dudley Do-Right : You couldn't kill me, could you?

  Snidely Whiplash : No. I suppose I'm just an old softy.

  Dudley Do-Right : Thank you, Mr. Whiplash.

  Snidely Whiplash : Say no more! Just go! I want to be left alone, to think, ponder, reflect...