Narrator: One ordinary day in May, three magical Goddesses of Fate, found themselves on the doorstep of a loveable college student named Keiichi Morisato. They had joy and laughter and many adventures together. And everyone was happy. Soon after their college days had ended, the Goddesses sold out and became an anime pop culture phenomenon, the was shortly killed off two seasons later by the Evangelion movies. But now there was a new series to pick up the torch. A bold series. A daring series. A series to end all series. That is... if the damn writer can ever get his act together. This is that story.
Belldandy: Doctor What! Doctor What!
Doctor What: What is it Belldandy?
Belldandy: I need your help. I need you to take me on another one of your Super Happy Fun Time Magical Sci Fi Adventures.
Doctor What: You really mean it this time? You and Keiichi want to meet me halfway and live a life of danger and excitement beyond your wildest dreams?
Urd: Wildest Nightmares is more like it.
Keiichi Morisato: Doctor What. We have a very special secret mission for you. One that only you can assist us with.
Doctor What: Oh, wow, this is getting exciting! What is it? What is it? No, wait, don't tell me... you saw Gods of Egypt and it sucked so bad you have to go out and live the real thing, right?
Keiichi Morisato: No!
Doctor What: It's Star Wars, isn't it? Ever since Rogue One came out, you've been wanting to take a magical trip into the world of Message from Space and Starship Troopers, haven't you?
Belldandy: Not even close!
Doctor What: Christfuck! I can't take this anymore! I'm about to fucking explode! Tell me! Tell me!
Keiichi Morisato: We want you to take us to Super Target on Black Friday.
Doctor What: Please tell me that this Super Target is located somewhere far into the future of technology or deep into the past.
Keiichi Morisato: Even better, it's a five minute walk around the corner.
Doctor What: Keiichi, you don't need a Tardis to go to Super Target on Black Friday.
Belldandy: Yes we do! Yes we do!
Doctor What: Dude, the Almighty just gave humanity all of this free shit like flying cars and spaceships! We're practically living in the era of Blade Runner! Are you seriously telling me you can't make a five minute trip to Super Target without my assistance?
Keiichi Morisato: Well, yeah, but this'll be going to Super Target in style! It's the Black Friday Adventure of a lifetime!
Doctor What: Oh Brother. I wonder if David Tennant's wife ever gives him shit like this.
Belldandy: You're goddamn fucking right she does! Let's go!