The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson (TV Series)

Carl Reiner/Holly Robinson/Jeff Cesario (1987)

Ed McMahon: Self - Announcer

Quotes 

• Johnny Carson : [after a lukewarm response to his sketch about royal family photos]  Just to give you a small sampling of what you missed: Did you know a real phobia, there's a phobia called arachibutyrophobia? That's an actual phobia. It's the fear of peanut butter sticking to your mouth. And those are the straight ones. The funny ones were dynamite. And you, didn't ask for it.

  Ed McMahon : Maybe tomorrow night?

  Johnny Carson : Oh no, no, I gotta wait a whole year now for that. My first guest...

  [pause] 

  Johnny Carson : Wanna hear another one?

  [audience cheers] 

  Johnny Carson : You know what gamophobia is? It's a real one. Gamophobia is a fear of marriage.

  [audience laughs] 

  Ed McMahon : How did you get over that?

  Johnny Carson : [chuckles]  Those are real. Now, here's one, I guess people can have this: Stasophobia. Stasophobia is the fear of standing up. I'm not making these up. Now just let me give you an idea of one of the funny ones to show you. Those were real ones. We had some others here. "Nightline-ophobia" is a fear that Muppet creator Jim Henson has his hand up Ted Koppel's back.

  [audience laughs/cheers] 

  Ed McMahon : They didn't pick...

  Johnny Carson : Shame, shame. You would've gone out of here chuckling, but now you're going out with visions of those dumb pictures dancing in your head.