- Stephanie (Steffy): What do you have against flying anyway?
- Wally: Nothing as long as I can keep one foot on the ground.
- Wally: [while eating] Oh, like, wow!
- Stephanie (Steffy): Well, what's the matter?
- Wally: If that's what they call poi, all I can say is "Oh, poi!"
- [Steffy and Wally trick the men following them into thinking Butch and Merilee are riding with them]
- Stephanie (Steffy): It worked. Oh, they think we're riding tandem.
- Wally: What?
- Stephanie (Steffy): Tandem. That means by two.
- Wally: I know how to use the word. Example: These two guys stayed on the beach too long and the sun tandem! Tandem!
- [laughs]
- Stephanie (Steffy): Oh, no!
- Stephanie (Steffy): What I want to know is who were those two men chasing us in that car.
- [Elvis barks]
- Butch Cassidy: You can bet they weren't fans.
- Wally: No, fans are fun, but crooks are kooks. Why do I have to be hassled by crooks?
- [Elvis mumbles]
- Stephanie (Steffy): Don't say it, Wally, we know. You're a musician, not an undercover agent.
- Wally: Ah, you took the words right out of my mouth.
- Mr. Socrates: Pearls will be transferred tonight.
- Butch Cassidy: How?
- Mr. Socrates: Answer: unavailable.
- Butch Cassidy: Where will the pearls be taken?
- Mr. Socrates: Definite answer: unavailable.
- Wally: That's where I'm going to be later, unavailable.
- Butch Cassidy: Anything else?
- [Elvis sniffs Butch's ring communicator]
- Mr. Socrates: That is all. Urgent action required.
- Butch Cassidy: We read you.
- Mr. Socrates: Ah... Ah... Get that dog away from the ring... Choo!
- Butch Cassidy: Gesundheit, Mr. Socrates. Down, Elvis!
- Wally: This is it, Steffy. The U.S. Coast Guard.
- [knocks on the door]
- Man: Yep?
- Wally: [pants] We need help!
- Man: Try the Tourist Bureau.
- [Elvis barks]
- Man: Yes?
- Stephanie (Steffy): Our friends are in the hands of pearl thieves!
- Wally: Take us to Diamond Head in your ship, please!
- Man: I can't do that.
- Stephanie (Steffy): For heaven's sake, why not?
- Man: Because I'm not in the Coast Guard.
- Wally: What?
- Man: I'm the janitor.
- [Elvis gulps and everyone starts to leave]
- Stephanie (Steffy): Can't you tell the difference between a captain and a janitor?
- Wally: In his underwear?
- Stephanie (Steffy): [while sailing in a speedboat] I'm getting a terrible feeling we won't arrive in time.
- Wally: I'm also getting a terrible feeling. It's called seasickness.