Instead of an initial comedy segment, there is just a bit of chatting between Johnny and Doc about their school teachers when young. (The subject is raised due to a news story mentioned in the monologue about a teacher's aide fired for appearing in Penthouse magazine.) Orson Bean talks about how he didn't like school, and tortured his teachers because he planned on dropping out as soon as he could, but his sixth grade teacher was wonderful. Bean then talks about driving cross country with his wife, four children, and cat, including stops in Iowa, the Dakotas and New Mexico; he notes that the cat was tearing around their van for the first thousand miles, but calmed down once they started letting it out overnight, always returning to their motel room in the morning. He also shows various old-time novelty gag items from the Johnson Smith Company catalogue, still for sale, of the type Johnny bought when young - such as wax lips, a joy buzzer and whoopee cushion, and fake cigarettes and ice cubes. Dom DeLuise comes out and first tells some school memories. He then talks about his recent trip to New York, staying with his parents in his childhood home, and all the energy of the city; he comments briefly on his national tour in the play "Luv", and Bean mentions that he will be appearing in Milwaukee in the stage musical "Sugar". In a prop bit Johnny promised before the interviews, he then quizzes DeLuise and Bean on names for common objects (or parts of common objects), from an article in Esquire magazine. Rodney Dangerfield does a stand-up comedy routine, then continues rapid-fire jokes during his interview segment. He shows a picture of his father (who was in vaudeville) with Charlie Chaplin in 1914; Carson surprises him by showing a teenage publicity photo of Dangerfield, in which he points a gun at a doll. Mariette Hartley first talks about a role in "Genesis II" where she had two navels. Johnny asks about her less successful pictures, and she talks about making "Drums of Africa" with Frankie Avalon. She also describes telling a prudish aunt when she was up for a role in "Bob and Carol and Ted and Alice".
—lenab9011