- Sgt. Hamilton Fish: It is the duty, the honor, of the patrician class to lead its countrymen by the sword.
- Craig Wadsworth: [having tamed a horse that Indian Bob was unable to break] Spirited mount!
- Henry Nash: Well, I'll be damned... Where'd he learn to ride like that?
- Sgt. Hamilton Fish: Craig Wadsworth is the finest polo player in the country. Do you play polo?
- Henry Nash: Oh, yeah, every day, right after my bubble bath!
- Wadsworth, Sr.: Life is hunger. Life is anger. Life is pain and dirt. Your grandfather knew life. He didn't recommend it. That's why we're rich.
- Wadsworth, Sr.: To be wealthy, warm, and well-thought of... that's what a man really wants, if he's honest. And you have it.
- [first lines]
- Henry Nash: I miss you, boys. Been more that twenty years. My God, we were young. Well, it was a young country then, full of promise and hope. Anything was possible then if you were an American.
- Gen. Joseph Wheeler: [after his horse was shot] I haven't had a horse shot out from under me in 30 years.
- [sigh]
- Gen. Joseph Wheeler: It's still a Thrill.
- Theodore Roosevelt: If it were up to me, we'd drive every European flag from this Hemisphere at bayonet point!
- Mademoiselle Adler: Mon dieu, help me, I feel faint.
- Edith Roosevelt: Feel free. By all means, fall right over!
- President William McKinley: Where are the Spaniards? It says they've landed at... Daiquiri.
- Secretary of State John Hay: Daiquiri? Isn't that a new summer cocktail?
- President William McKinley: Now you're getting the idea, Mr. Hay...
- Secretary of State John Hay: [examining the New York Journal's account of the Maine sinking] I think you're a scoundrel, Randolph - completely without conscience.
- William Randolph Hearst: What, did Freddie go too far?
- Frederick Remington: You don't really think that those people blew up that boat, now do you?
- Secretary of State John Hay: A naval blockade is in the offing, gentlemen.
- Frederick Remington: A naval blockade is hardly a war.
- William Randolph Hearst: Furnish the pictures, Freddie, and I'll furnish the war!
- Frederick Remington: Very good, Willy.
- Secretary of State John Hay: Well said, Randolph!
- William Randolph Hearst: Thank you, Mr. Secretary.
- Secretary of State John Hay: Cheers.
- William Randolph Hearst: Remember the Maine, and to HELL with Spain!
- Secretary of State John Hay: General, you were one of the finest cavalry officers in the Confederacy.
- Gen. Joseph Wheeler: [shakes his head] Let me tell you something... Bedford Forrest had 32 horses shot out from under him, but he killed 33 Yankees.
- [chuckles]
- Gen. Joseph Wheeler: Forrest was better!
- Col. Leonard Wood: [examining an account of the Battle of Manila Bay] He was your appointment, was he not?
- Theodore Roosevelt: Oh, I had a hand in it!
- Col. Leonard Wood: And it was your plan to have Dewey coal his warships and set sail for Manila Bay.
- Theodore Roosevelt: Secretary Long was on vacation in New England.
- Col. Leonard Wood: So, YOU took the initiative?
- Theodore Roosevelt: I suppose so... But that Commodore Dewey was like a wolfhound slipped from the leash, wasn't he, Leonard?
- Col. Leonard Wood: I suppose he was, Theodore... And Roosevelt is like a young second lieutenant: Ambitious, often overreaching, frequently insubordinate, brash... but, successful - this time. Don't try it with me!
- Gen. Joseph Wheeler: [eating a stew] You stole this hog!
- [makes oinking noises, to the consternation of Wood and Roosevelt]
- Eli: We caught the gator and the snake.
- Gen. Joseph Wheeler: Snake?
- Eli: Footless animal stew, sir.
- [chuckles]
- Capt. Bucky O'Neil: [to Nash, grabbing his throat] Nash! Where were you the night Roosevelt came in? Hmm? I know you are and I know what you did. You should have got out while you had the chance, because you ain't getting out now. If any of my men dies because of you, I'll have you pulled apart by horses! Understand? Savvy?
- Col. Leonard Wood: All in all, Theodore, you're shaping up to be a competent officer. Don't let it go to your head.
- Theodore Roosevelt: No, sir. I shall not do that!
- Gen. Shafter: Our transport ships haven't even got here yet! And now I hear supplies are still aboard trains? And our quartermaster tells me he has no idea WHICH trains! I've never seen anything like it. My God, I've never seen anything like it in my lifetime!
- Gen. Joseph Wheeler: That's because nothing like this has ever happened in your lifetime.
- Theodore Roosevelt: [trying to convince Wood to be Colonel of the Rough Riders] Come on, Leonard, you already know you're going. Why not at the head of the wildest mad cap regiment since the Mongols rode the Steppes?
- Col. Leonard Wood: Theodore, do you know that you're mad?
- Edith Roosevelt: Well, it's never bothered him before...
- Newsman: Colonel Roosevelt, what do you think of this regiment, the Rough Riders?
- Theodore Roosevelt: I think this regiment could whip Caesar's Tenth Legion! I think they could ride with Genghis Khan! They are the best examples of American manhood. We have cowboys, Ivy Leaguers, football players, polo players, bronco busters, New York City policemen... and one man, I regret to say, who used to work for the Internal Revenue Service!
- Sgt. Henry Bardshar: A man's gotta do what he has to do, Sara.
- Sara Bardshar: Yeah, and a woman's got to do everything else.
- Gen. Joseph Wheeler: [to McKinley] But don't worry too much about them people in the South. there's nothing they like better than a good fight.
- [laughs]
- Gen. Joseph Wheeler: Good day.
- [He starts to leave]
- Gen. Joseph Wheeler: Oh, we don't even celebrate the Fourth of July.
- [Guffaws]
- Gen. Joseph Wheeler: Maybe after this, we will.
- Henry Nash: [Pointing out the Apache] Look at that Indian. There ain't nuthin' human about him. He don't even talk.
- Indian Bob: He ain't got nuthin' to say.
- Henry Nash: But he's a wild Indian. What are you?
- Indian Bob: Sioux. You know, the ones who got Custer.