Plot

Johnny reads jokes sent by viewers during the writers' strike. Arnold Schwarzenegger (Red Heat (1988)); Jerry Seinfeld does stand-up about horses, and comments on advertising; Andre Agassi talks about reaching the French Open semifinals.

For the comedy segment, Johnny reads jokes submitted to a USA Today contest during the writers' strike; out of about 600 responses, more than half were either ethnic jokes or jokes about body parts. The ones he reads are generally either puns, riddles, or jokes about animals; the last joke is a submission from West Germany in fractured English. Arnold Schwarzenegger says he is fine with people making jokes about him, and talks about his recent Friar's Club roast; he feels he has a great sense of humor, so he tries to put some comedy in his films. He then talks about his current film "Red Heat", comments on filming in Red Square, and mentions that he is working on "Twins" with Danny DeVito. He talks about working with dialect coach Robert Easton for three months to learn the pages of Russian dialogue for "Red Heat", and a clip from the movie is shown. Jerry Seinfeld does a stand-up comedy routine about horses. During his interview, he talks about his young nephew but says he is not ready for a family of his own. He also talks about his Clio Award nomination for a commercial, and comments on movie posters and billboards. Tennis star Andre Agassi is just 18 years old, but is coming off the French Open semifinals; Johnny projects him as a future champion. Agassi talks about hitting with Jimmy Connors as a young child. He says he didn't go to Wimbledon because he couldn't dress as he preferred. He also says he needs to get some rest.—lenab9011