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- Crazy creditsBefore feature is over, card reading "The End (but what really happened?)" is displayed.
Featured review
Unconvincing thriller made for the clique members to enjoy
With their steady stream of DVDs and continuous flow of website content, porno team of Bree and Alan have to be considered a success in the Adult field, but "Project Pandora" is yet another example of how much further they must travel before concocting cogent features. Bree's script is poor, overacting encouraged, and net result quite disappointing.
It's better than their incredibly overrated horror opus "The Turning". This tale of fear of being blackmailed on account of one's lesbian indulgences is hardly in the Cate Blanchett/Kate Mara league, but even as "just porn" it's stillborn. Instead of sitting on well-cast lead Cherie DeVille, the auteurs let her chew up the scenery, reducing a potentially moving role to mere camp.
Early in the lengthy feature there is verbal allusion to "The Turning", but its relevance is never adequately established, other than namedropping that Lesbian Armageddon as "last year's virus". Mention of women not being allowed to congregate together just sounds silly and is violated for the rest of the nearly 3 hour trek.
Legendary myth of Pandora's box is here merely a box stored away by Cherie as Isadora, containing photos, letters and mementos recalling her youthful affair with her cousin Kitty. Lots of flash-shots and ultimately sex flashback show Cherie and Kitty making love at age 18 (chosen merely for pseudo-legality by our timid pornographers), played in young incarnations by Mia Malkova and Abella Danger.
In the lengthy BTS featurette the interview with the filmmakers has Alan making a key Freudian slip. He's very proud of the matched casting (besides Mia to Cherie there is Abella to Mercedes Carrera in the Kitty aging role). He boasts how he and Bree have much experience in matching resemblance as they cast their endless series of stepmother/daughter and step-sister lesbian vignettes for a variety of websites. Having these "unrelated" (for fear of censorship re: incest) couples look like blood relatives clearly betrays the hoax underlying most of their work: shooting incest porn that is supposed to be interpreted as incest by the sensational-hungry audience, while constantly claiming (ad nauseum) -no, they're not related!
Punchline for me is that Mia and Cherie, also Abella and Mercedes do not resemble each other to make the 18-year-old aging to about 32-year-old believable. In the porno world breast implants can account for some drastic physical progressions, but even with that cop out (and Abella already has big real-life breasts at age 20), Danger does not look at all like Mercedes (let alone Latina, period). She also had to suddenly grow a few inches in height after 18 to reach Mercedes' altitude.
Storyline is hardly gripping, as we suffer with Cherie due to her endless guilt over an affair long ago with her cousin. She keeps protesting in equal measure the horror of having committed incest and the horror of giving into lesbian tendencies. The fact that those two genres sum up the entire output of Bree & Alan gives you an idea of how self-serving, nudge, nudge, this entire show is.
I won't include any spoilers but suffice it to say that Cherie is a victim of a conspiracy and some malevolent forces that I, for one, could not connect with the previous content of "The Turning". Structurally, I was astounded by the directors' infantile gimmick of providing more story and twists in the last 3 minutes of the video, AFTER "The End" was flashed on screen, than in the previous 160 minutes. Also notably clunky is Cherie having a nightmare in which she makes love not only to cousin Kitty = young Abella, but also to herself = young Malkova. What scripter Bree must have thought was imaginative was to me very, very stupid. Of course, however one reacts from a story-line point-of-view, such a scene is there just to inject some 3-way action.
A minor crew member Billy Visual (who directs terrible videos for Digital Playground) is cast as Isadora's stolid husband and plays it like a cardboard cutout, befitting the cardboard character Bree wrote. Biggest waste of talent is cute Jenna Sativa as Isadora's transparently sinister sister-in-law, yet another role still floating around in Bree's cranium, waiting to be properly written -oops! It's too late! The DVD has already hit the streets for my enjoyment. And worse yet, I have to sit through another 3 hours ditty titled "Telepathy" to find out the "origins" back story behind this loser.
It's better than their incredibly overrated horror opus "The Turning". This tale of fear of being blackmailed on account of one's lesbian indulgences is hardly in the Cate Blanchett/Kate Mara league, but even as "just porn" it's stillborn. Instead of sitting on well-cast lead Cherie DeVille, the auteurs let her chew up the scenery, reducing a potentially moving role to mere camp.
Early in the lengthy feature there is verbal allusion to "The Turning", but its relevance is never adequately established, other than namedropping that Lesbian Armageddon as "last year's virus". Mention of women not being allowed to congregate together just sounds silly and is violated for the rest of the nearly 3 hour trek.
Legendary myth of Pandora's box is here merely a box stored away by Cherie as Isadora, containing photos, letters and mementos recalling her youthful affair with her cousin Kitty. Lots of flash-shots and ultimately sex flashback show Cherie and Kitty making love at age 18 (chosen merely for pseudo-legality by our timid pornographers), played in young incarnations by Mia Malkova and Abella Danger.
In the lengthy BTS featurette the interview with the filmmakers has Alan making a key Freudian slip. He's very proud of the matched casting (besides Mia to Cherie there is Abella to Mercedes Carrera in the Kitty aging role). He boasts how he and Bree have much experience in matching resemblance as they cast their endless series of stepmother/daughter and step-sister lesbian vignettes for a variety of websites. Having these "unrelated" (for fear of censorship re: incest) couples look like blood relatives clearly betrays the hoax underlying most of their work: shooting incest porn that is supposed to be interpreted as incest by the sensational-hungry audience, while constantly claiming (ad nauseum) -no, they're not related!
Punchline for me is that Mia and Cherie, also Abella and Mercedes do not resemble each other to make the 18-year-old aging to about 32-year-old believable. In the porno world breast implants can account for some drastic physical progressions, but even with that cop out (and Abella already has big real-life breasts at age 20), Danger does not look at all like Mercedes (let alone Latina, period). She also had to suddenly grow a few inches in height after 18 to reach Mercedes' altitude.
Storyline is hardly gripping, as we suffer with Cherie due to her endless guilt over an affair long ago with her cousin. She keeps protesting in equal measure the horror of having committed incest and the horror of giving into lesbian tendencies. The fact that those two genres sum up the entire output of Bree & Alan gives you an idea of how self-serving, nudge, nudge, this entire show is.
I won't include any spoilers but suffice it to say that Cherie is a victim of a conspiracy and some malevolent forces that I, for one, could not connect with the previous content of "The Turning". Structurally, I was astounded by the directors' infantile gimmick of providing more story and twists in the last 3 minutes of the video, AFTER "The End" was flashed on screen, than in the previous 160 minutes. Also notably clunky is Cherie having a nightmare in which she makes love not only to cousin Kitty = young Abella, but also to herself = young Malkova. What scripter Bree must have thought was imaginative was to me very, very stupid. Of course, however one reacts from a story-line point-of-view, such a scene is there just to inject some 3-way action.
A minor crew member Billy Visual (who directs terrible videos for Digital Playground) is cast as Isadora's stolid husband and plays it like a cardboard cutout, befitting the cardboard character Bree wrote. Biggest waste of talent is cute Jenna Sativa as Isadora's transparently sinister sister-in-law, yet another role still floating around in Bree's cranium, waiting to be properly written -oops! It's too late! The DVD has already hit the streets for my enjoyment. And worse yet, I have to sit through another 3 hours ditty titled "Telepathy" to find out the "origins" back story behind this loser.
helpful•12
- lor_
- May 11, 2016
Details
- Runtime2 hours 43 minutes
- Color
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