- Michelangelo: Does he have a pizza for a face?
- Pizza: Yes!
- Michelangelo: Then I will call him Pizza Face!
- Pizza: But we all have pizza faces...
- Michelangelo: Enough!
- Irma Langinstein: That's garbage pizza delivered from crazy town! I'd sooner eat a jar of toxic waste filled with onions and tomatoes and...
- Michelangelo: Now, what would be in the best pizza ever? Duh! Hot sauce!
- [sings while preparing a pizza]
- Michelangelo: I love a little hot sauce on my pizza! I love a little hot sauce, yes I do! But hot sauce isn't hot, without sardines, son! It just tastes like a pile of sticky GOO! Some protein from a pile of worms, some garlic, chives and marshmallows too! But wait a second, BOO! If you please, I'm missing the most important part: CHEESE! A cheesicle, I need my cheesicle, Ice Cream Kitty, give me a cheesicle! Come on!
- [Ice Cream Kitty gives him a cheesicle]
- Michelangelo: Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty! Kitty, kitty, kitty! Ice Cream Kitty give me a cheesicle! Come on!
- Raphael: Are they ever gonna stop singing? It sickens me!
- Pizza: W-Where am I?
- Michelangelo: I'll ask the questions here, see? Tell me what you've done with my brothers and my sensei, see?
- Pizza: Think I'm gonna spill my toppings? No way! My crust is sealed.
- [Mikey peels off a piece of pepperoni from the pizza and eats it]
- Michelangelo: You're gonna talk. Now let's try this one more time. Who is the pizza mastermind?
- Pizza: Grill me all you want. I'm not gonna give up the big cheese.
- Michelangelo: Tough guy, huh? 'Cause I don't grill cheese, I BAKE it. In a hot, sticky oven! Get the picture?
- [shows the pizza an oven filled with burnt remains of pizza]
- Pizza: [shocked] You sick little monkey!
- Michelangelo: There's only one way out of this... and that's eating my way out!
- [starts chomping on pizza]
- Pizza Face: Mamma mia! What are you doing?
- Pizza Face: [eats Mikey] That's a-spicy a-meatball! Huh... No! NOO!
- [Mikey eats his way out of Pizza Face]
- Michelangelo: How much?
- Pizza Boy: At Antonio's the first one's free.
- Michelangelo: Whoa... How many times can you order the first one?
- Michelangelo: You think I'd joke about the pizza? You know me a little better than that, Donnie, to joke about the pizza!
- Pizza: They'll never believe you now... Totally... worth it. Ugh! I'm going into the light...
- Michelangelo: This is like so. Messed. Up.
- Pizza Face: [singing to the tune of Funiculi Funicula while wrapping people in calzones] Mushrooms, olives, mozzarella too, peppers, onions, mortadella roux, yum-a, yummy, yum-a, yummy, yum-a, yum-a, yum-a, you, humans taste so good inside a calzone yes it's true, hey!