"Eine halbe Ewigkeit" (which means "half an eternity") or "Ein Herz und eine Haube" is a German television movie from 2011, which runs for 1.5 hours exactly pretty much like most German small screen movies. Director Tiefenbacher is really prolific and his writer here Volker Krappen was not too experienced when this film came out almost a decade ago (maybe more depending on when you read this review) and sadly it shows. The script is a mess at times and it rarely feels realistic. This takes place at its core at a monastery here in Germany and I believe that when this was made, the ARD series "Um Gottes Willen" was pretty popular and had millions and millions watching on a regular basis, so maybe that is why they decided to make this film that has a similar background. Froboess instead of Speidel, Habich instead of Wepper. It kinda fits. I am not too familiar with this series, but the extracts I saw I didn't like too much, so I am not surprised I did not like this film either. Kinda embarrassing to see Froboess even received awards attention. I mean she is clearly not the worstg actress in here, but even she despite all her experience has a fairly weak moment here and there, although it needs to be said that the script did not exactly help her. Or any of the other actors. The maybe worst example is the young student who wants to become a full-timer at the monastery. Oh well, she was really bad at times. Like unbearable to watch and she made the already poorly-written lines even more of a failure, also with her body language and face expressions. She is also the one who gets a story line about another character potentially being related to her and this felt all for the sake of drama too to me and never authentic. Same for the romance story at the center of the film between the two older actors I already mentioned. Their relationship is the title of the film basically because they meet again after decades and of course they fall in love now and what did not happen when they were young (at least not permanently) happens now. There is never any denying there would be a happy ending. Screw cancer, another part of the plot that felt very cheap to evoke emotion only in the pretty simple-minded. Kinda shameful to handle a serious subject like this in such a shoddy manner. They really rushed in all they could to evoke any kind of emotion from the audience and it would have been enough for a 6-partg 9-hour mini series. Oh well, I guess I am glad I only had to sit through this for an hour and a half. The characters also all lack shades completely it must be said. Either completely good or bad. At least that is what they were trying to sell us in terms of Lambert Hamel. He was sort of the main antagonist, or at leastg they wanted us to see him like that. I personally felt sorry for him. He loved the female protagonist for decades (God knows why) and is eventually pushed away from her for hardly any reason. He is the kind of actor by the way whose face you recognize immediately, but the name not so much. So here it is again: Lambert Hamel. He was good, certainly too good for his character, and I almost found myself cheering for him. Oh sorry, I am supposed to hate him right? Thanks, but no thanks. This film was a big mess that lacked realism from beginning to end. Plus acting chops. But most of all a good screenplay. When was the last time you were heading to a pharmacy and the pharmacist at the counter tells you about another guy's illness. Not even doctors are allowed to do that. Come on. But yeah, then the dramatic music plays and we are supposed to feel bad for Habich's character because the secret is out right? I know I didn't. I felt nothing for this film at all. Except surprise why it was made. Massive thumbs-down.
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