Plot

Fred suspects that his new music teacher is a vampire and sets out to prove his theory.

Fred's life becomes like a horror movie: his favorite music teacher is missing and all suspicions point to her replacement, Mr. Devlin, a pale man who dresses in all black and carries an umbrella in the sunlight.... Fred suspects that he's a vampire. With the help of his faithful friend Bertha, Fred sets out to save the town from this garlic-hating fiend.—Evan Dalton

Fred arrives home screaming and shares his flashback with the audience. The day before Fred went to music class to play Fur Elise and his favorite music teacher Mrs. Felson, who has trouble hearing, told him that he plays beautifully. The next day he comes in to play, expecting Mrs. Felson, but finds out that she has been replaced by Mr. Devlin. He then sees Mr. Devlin cleaning up and throwing away a hearing aide, which makes Fred wary. Later he is walking home with his best friend, Bertha, and sees a girl named Talia following them. Believing that he is being stalked, he runs home and arrives screaming.

The next day at school Devlin supports everyone to join a community called Join the World of Music. Fred thinks that Devlin is trying to turn everyone into vampires by having them take his lessons, and to his horror everyone takes the lessons. That night Fred spies on him and sees him burying something, which he suspects is a body. After Fred finishes talking to Talia, she vanishes, causing him to think she is a ghost; he imagines her ghost in his house and falls down the stairs reaching for her. The door is knocked on and he opens it to see Kevin's mom and she invites them to a party; then it is revealed that Talia is Kevin's sister. The next day, the doorbell rings and Fred opens it to see Mr. Devlin, who is taking his mom on a date; this makes him become immediately uneasy.

Fred enlists the help of Bertha to lend a helping hand in getting enough proof that Mr. Devlin is a vampire. Fred and Bertha spy on Mr. Devlin and Fred's mom's date, with Bertha posing as a waitress (when Mr. Devlin remarks that she looks just like one of his students, she covers it up by claiming to be her mother). Mr. Devlin orders a bloody steak making Bertha more suspicious. He then spies on Mr. Devlin sees his old music teacher's jacket; he then becomes even more suspicious of Devlin. Later that night, he falls from his window because he notices Mr. Devlin see him as he is trying to get away. Then, his "dad" pulls him up and brings him to a wrestling arena, where they form a tag team. Mr. Devlin and Kevin also form a tag team. His dad beats up Mr. Devlin, Fred finally pins Kevin and him and his dad win. At this point, Fred wakes up, suggesting it was all just a dream.

The next day Fred is so captivated by Mr. Devlin that he has another one of his infamous "Fred flashbacks/daydreams". This time Fred imagines himself engaged in a homo erotic fantasy whereras Mr. Devlin is sucking Fred's neck engorging himself with his sweet and tantalizing blood. Realizing this is taboo, and against his whole moral code, Fed snaps out of his daydream and runs down the street screaming his trademark high pitch/girly like scream absolutely disgusted with himself. He runs into his alter-ego, Derf, who helps Fred snap of his panic. Once Fred calms downs he gives Derf a 5 minute run down of how to rid vampires utilizing a street sign "cross; garlic sauce and a few other items he looked up and found on he internet to help ward off and destroy vampires. Derf warns Fred that it's illegal to steal street signs as you hear a police siren in the background and Fred goes running frantic to a Chinese restaurant to get some garlic chicken "hold the chicken" as part of his plan to rid the eccentric Mr. Devlin and puts it all together to take to the piano recital where Mr. Devlin, "The Vampire", will be performing along with his minion the next day.

Fred goes around the neighborhood putting up crucifixes to fend off Devlin, as vampires hate all things holy. He also fills up squirt guns and super soakers with the garlic sauce (hold the chicken) that he acquired from the Chinese restaurant to arm himself for the big vampire eradication. He arms himself with all of the "How to rid of Vampires as Seen on the Internet" items and walks into the piano recital hall where he then goes on a "Vampire Shooting Spree" soaking everyone as he enters, including Talia. Afterward, to Fred's horror, Mr. Devlin invites him into his house for dinner so that they can "bury the hatchet". Fred sets up a live video streaming from his phone so he can prove that Devlin is a vampire. Inside Devlin's house, Fred discovers a secret butchers' room behind a wall filled with meat and bones. As Fred investigates, Devlin creeps in with a long knife and a tall head-dress, scaring Fred; Fred then drops his phone into a pot of boiling liquid. The video freezes on Devlin, and the frozen image of Devlin in his headdress causes everyone watching the video to think that he is a vampire. But after Devlin explains every weird hobby he has, Fred starts to relate to him, and he comes to like Devlin.

At school he realizes that everyone has seen his video, which makes everyone believe that Devlin is a vampire. He runs to Devlin's house to apologize but Devlin is too depressed to answer. When Fred sees Mr. Devlin get fired, and put up a sign for his house, saying that he is moving, he feels guilty and tries to fix it all by making them think he is the vampire. Bertha and Talia both help, as Talia reveals how much she dislikes her brother. Kevin and his friends go up to Devlin's house because they think he has Talia. Devlin tells them that vampires are not real, but Bertha comes out and says, "Vampires are real, but it's not Devlin. It's him!" Then, Fred walks out of the garage carrying Talia, threatening to turn her into a vampire too. Bertha makes Kevin stab Fred, and he gets sprayed with fake blood. Devlin sees Fred and accepts his apology, revealing that he quit his job and sold his house of his own choice, but still sees Fred as his one true friend. In the end, as Fred's mom and Devlin go out for dinner and go out the door, Fred looks at the mirror in his house and sees that Mr. Devlin has no reflection, revealing that he was a vampire after all, and Fred screams in terror as the film ends.