On Christmas Day, the town of Crystal River is awakened to a rude disturbance. A nuclear primate, known as the infamous Christmas Ape, surfaces from the woods to wreak terror throughout the city. Meanwhile, three young scienticians; Dr. Horatio, Dr. Millencroft, and Dr. Kane are searching for fame, fortune, glory and maybe a little meaning to their lives. Their big chance is handed to them as the Mayor of Crystal River offers a $100,000 reward for capturing the Christmas Ape. The three young scienticians form Crystal River Research Ape Patrol without hesitation. The problem that arises is how to capture this giant ape. Hilarity ensues as the three scienticians battle to keep their hopes alive, at any cost.
—Luke J. Ogrodnik