- Lisa Simpson: Dad, can I ask you something?
- Homer Simpson: Sure. What's troubling you, my son... I mean, my girl son?
- Bart Simpson: A boy is beating me up at school.
- Marge Simpson: Is it Milhouse?
- Bart Simpson: Milhouse couldn't beat anybody up.
- Marge Simpson: Are you sure? He's been going through a growth spurt.
- Bart Simpson: It's not Milhouse! It's Nelson.
- Marge Simpson: Nelson? I never thought of him as the bully type. Well, if a bully picks on you and Milhouse isn't there to protect you, the best way to deal with him is make him feel good.
- Bart Simpson: How do I do that?
- Marge Simpson: You could say something nice about him. Try complimenting his glasses.
- Bart Simpson: It's not Milhouse!
- Lisa Simpson: [Walking down the hall at school] Ugh. What's the point of getting rid of all the distractions at home if I have to do my learning here?
- [Walks into the library and opens a book, smiling because it's quiet]
- Groundskeeper Willie: [Walks into the library, running a loudly whirring floor waxer. Sings] Oh, I'll wax the upstairs and I'll wax the downstairs, and I'll get drunk in the library!
- Lisa Simpson: [Annoyed] Willie! Do you have to wax this floor now?
- Groundskeeper Willie: [Turns off waxer. Apologetically] No, no. I can come back later.
- [Turns around to leave and slips on the waxed floor, landing with a loud crunch. He screams in pain]
- Groundskeeper Willie: Aaah!
- Lisa Simpson: [Concerned] Oh! Should I get the nurse?
- Groundskeeper Willie: Nay, just keep studyin'. I'll scream this out.
- [Writhing on the floor]
- Groundskeeper Willie: Aaah! Oy! Aaaahh!
- Lisa Simpson: [Frustrated] Ugh!
- [Lisa covers her ears]
- Lisa Simpson: Mom, I didn't know you won the science fair.
- Marge Simpson: Oh, that's ancient history. Ooh, my paper on ancient history!