Better Off Ted (TV Series)

Mess of a Salesman (2010)

Andrea Anders: Linda Zwordling

Quotes 

• Linda Zwordling : [to Veronica]  There's really no middle ground with you. Either you don't care at all or you care 100 and crazy %.

• Veronica : I'm getting an award! Every year the Veridian Charitable Foundation honours someone who's been outstanding and this year they've chosen me.

  Linda Zwordling : For what?

  Veronica : For being outstanding!

  Linda Zwordling : For being outstanding at what?

  Veronica : [pause]  *I'm* getting an award!

  Ted Crisp : You realize as an honouree you're gonna have to raise a bunch of money for the foundation?

  Veronica : I know, that's the part I'm dreading. Linda, you do it for me. Huh, that wasn't so bad!

  Linda Zwordling : Before I agree to do something I have no choice in, do you even know which charity Veridian's giving the money too?

  Veronica : [pause]  *I'm getting at award!*

• Veronica : It's time for this fawn to strap on a machine gun, spread it's wings, and fly

  Linda Zwordling : Okay, what exactly do you think a fawn is?

• Linda Zwordling : [Speaking to Mr. Page; head of the Veridian charity foundation]  No, we're not done here. This woman opened her heart, and that happens so rarely, you could hear the hinges squeak. I will not let you slam that rusty heart door shut.

  Veronica : [From behind Linda]  Go, Linda. Release your anger.

  Linda Zwordling : You will not crush this woman's spirit and love. You spineless, condescending bureaucrat.

  Veronica : Good, Linda. Only your hatred can destroy him.

  Linda Zwordling : You, sir, are a bad egg.

  Veronica : Yes! now strike!

  Linda Zwordling : [Head butts Mr. Page]  Wow. Where did that come from?

  Veronica : I *am* a good mentor.

• Linda Zwordling : His head made a boop sound!

  Veronica Palmer : Boop!